The Rogue the Slayer and the Mage
by sabrina-diamond
Summary: Keliare, Seraphine and Tetris, three unlikely Adventurers and their journey to end Safiria's reign over Darkovia. Will their differences end their unity? Keliare unwillingly fight the Lycan tribe as a war trigger. MQ crossover
1. Refresh

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

Keliare sniffled loudly though her Rogue crossbow was steady. Even her leather armour was not good enough for this Undead attack - and what was more, most of her health potions were used up.

The white-haired lady's hands were shaking through exertion of the force that she was holding, as the rough wood strained against her palm.

The Undead Zard laughed at Keliare's effort to defend as it leapt forwards. She felt the piercing fangs scrape at her arm, stinging and raw.

Her final thought before she fell towards the ground was one of pure regret.

* * *

Meanwhile, in another part of Battleon... There was a young and enthusiastic female, wearing a familiar brown cloak with a deep-seated brim in the hat. 

The other people at the inn were puzzled at her appearance as the Adventurer strode into the room with an unusual confidence. The female had amber eyes as well as jet-coloured hair that fell around her shoulders like an inky wave.

"Hello there," smiled Yulgar's blond cousin at the female, he was attempting to make conversation with the chatty girl. _Seems like she is very experienced for her age._

Noting the shadowy darkened wolf near the Adventurer's feet, Hans saw that the animal had an unusually wise expression on its face, almost one of amusement.

* * *

"I see you like pets," Robina Hood laughed at the face, "What a cute canine…!" 

"I have many other pets," gestured Seraphine very gently, her voice was silky and yet slightly rough for her age, which surprised Robina…

"Where do you venture when night appears?" wondered Twilly, the small one sensed…

Something eerily wrong with this female, the girl didn't smell like 'ice-cream and fishes' to his sensitive Moglin nose.

Instead Twilly smelt a musky and almost pungent animalistic scent.

Twilly leapt away agilely from the female, who had seemed to have noticed his strange reaction. Robina didn't seem to mind as she continued chattering to Seraphine.

"Well… I go to seek out Darkovian citizens, vampire-queen Safira for instance. I'm a Slayer you see, it's my job to weed out the _emotionless_ undead who leech deserved 'health-points' from others." There was a slight hesitance in the voice.

"That's very interesting news from Darkovia; we don't often get Slayers coming to the Inn. Remaining Slayers seem to avoid the Inn like a plague of Lycans…"

Instinctively the canine companion started to howl mournfully.

Seraphine swooped to her feet as nimble as a surefooted Neff Kitten.

Robina was surprised at the swiftness, almost stepping back in fear.

The next words sent shudders down numerous spines.

"_Hush,_ I hear someone moving outside." Seraphine murmured as she listened intently.

One could almost see the female Slayer's ears 'twitching' in utter concentration in response to an unseen presence.

"It's one of _them."_

"Who?" breathed Hans in squeaky tension.

The tension was demonstrated in the way his voice was strained.

"_Vampiric soldiers."_

* * *

The first sensation that hit the rogue was utter confusion, kaleidoscopic star bursts seemed to erupt inside her eyes, making the eyelids wince in familiar recognition.

Then there was a slow and painful awareness of the curtained surroundings.

Keliare could sense the hypnotic flame coloured dress sweeping in front of her as a sultry elegant voice caressed her mind, seducing her with the silkily velvet fabric...

Instinctively Keliare felt like she wanted to bat the dress with her hands, a voice was tempting her but she quickly disregarded it.

Then it hit her like a ton of bricks, she was in a room that was gothic in appearance and the lady in front of her was at least 6 feet tall.

Realisation made her quake morbidly as she gaped up at the towering Queen above her view.

"_My slave, worthless ninja cat, you must submit to my authority."_

The only sound that was emitted was several pitiful wailing squeals as the transmogrified Rogue realised she was now in grave danger.

She glanced at the barracked wooden door and saw deathly pale foot soldiers guarding the entrance.

Sensing Keliare's apparent fear, the Queen ordered the guards to back off.

Obeying the commands, the demonic foot soldiers glanced at the strange being at the gothic Queen's feet and hissed loudly.

"My Queen, what shall we do with this scallywag?" bowed a General as his voice echoed broadly through the increased darkening shadows.

"Nothing, General Grim-Weld. I have _my own_ plans for the Rogue."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Muhahaa, I ended it on a cliffhanger didn't I?

They are based on three of my Adventure Quest players! More will be added soon

Poor Keliare and Seraphine will be drawn into the battle of their lives soon.

And what is up with Seraphine? She seems very tense. Will she defeat those vampiric soldiers?  
What is the secret that Seraphine covets? Why didn't Keliare get the Grim Reaper treatment?

Why does Safira want Keliare for her plans??

All will be revealed soon


	2. Seraphine's fury

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"This is for your 5, 000 year old unholy alliance with the Undead!" Seraphine yelled when she stepped outside the Inn as the rest of her numerous pets were braying at her feet.

A flame-coloured Vampragon leapt out of her special bottomless sachet that Adventurers always carry.

A small Void Dragon snapped hungrily as the Dark-wolf pawed at its master's feet.

"What alliance?" commented a slow, immature and jerky voice as the humanoid stepped into the Inn 's lights…

A tall yet stocky mage with a somewhat dimwittedly simple appearance grinned, his manners was deceptively docile and eager as he approached the Slayer.

An experienced vampire Slayer would not fooled by the mage's outlooks.

The Slayer was eying his unnaturally sharpened teeth...

"My name's _Teretis._ I am in the soldier ranks of Safira's army."

Seraphine reacted with an unexpected laugh, which confused Teretis.

"Teretis… A wicked name indeed." Seraphine snickered.

"I was expecting something slightly more intimidating like _Sir Vlad_ or even _Bram Striker…!"_

The Slayer's lips curled in a sneer, in her opinion, she could finish him off extremely easy, _nothing to it._

"You slayers always talk tough," commented Teretis in a heartless voice, he yawned in an awkward fashion. "Slayer D seems to get new recruits every week." He insulted.

"Got any more insults for _moi?"_ the mage dared sluggishly at the female.

"No, but if you insist, I got a joke with an extra sting." offered Seraphine.

As the Slayer spoke, she fingered the metallic long bladed sword which was crafted for special occasion.

The craftsman who made the blade had sculpted the weapon from the finest materials that Darkovia could afford, the aim was deadly accurate.

The blade was hidden deep in her coarse and hirsute Slayer uniform...

* * *

The pets shifted uneasily under the mage's grin, they sensed the lust for bodily fluids and they were conscious the owner of the slow voice would battle primeval forces.

Seraphine continued with her weapon tucked safely away so that Teretis wouldn't notice.

Meanwhile Teretis was staring at her hungrily; wondering whether to attack.

Seraphine was swift and before Teretis knew it, she launched the first defence.

A flurry of action occurred as the mage widened his stance, blocking the swing with his wrist as _skewing_ of the blade plunged deep into a nearby tree…

"You are a fantastic Slayer; months of experience have prepared you for _them..."_

"However can you dodge my _brand_ of magic?" commented the undead mage.

_"Fire bat Swarm."_

Immediately, Seraphine had to duck as the tree she was currently occupying burst into several flames...

* * *

"You could have killed me." Seraphine yelled in uninhibited frustration...

"This is so typical of your undead minions. _Well, now you shall have to pay."_

Suddenly, as Seraphine leapt from her refuge, there was a swift transformation and then was a toffee-coloured furred Collie in the familiar Slayer uniform... Her fur was long and flowing and was the same colour as toffee.

Teretis was so started at the revelation that his brain couldn't comprehend the change fast enough.

With a vicious growl the Alpha-female stalked the mage in her anger.

_"I don't take kindly to the Undead, so let's get this over with."_

* * *

**Author's Notes:** Whoo!! That was an intense fight wasn't it? And Seraphine is not a wolf-being, she's a Collie-Lycan... (yeah, yeah, I know... A Lycan is someone who gets bitten by a wolf.)

Will the unlikey alliance ever resolve their fights?!


	3. Irony

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"Seraphine, why do we have to duel in Darkovia…?"

Teretis was cynical.

"For a Slayer, you may have some good tactics, but your strategies are actually bunked."  
_"You think of a good reason why I shouldn't suggest this…"_ Seraphine chuckled.

"You sure have a lot of perjure. But did I tell you, not many Undead roam here."

As they were talking, the dark woods of the fabled Darkovia were hiding a secret.

The two rivals were walking right into a _trap._

Immediately fishing net swooped upwards and captured the two quarrelling protagonists.

('Hey!' Teretis shouted)

"Get your mangy dog tail out of my armour…!" screamed Teretis.

Seraphine sighed in desperation as she kicked the mage in the crotch, _would he shut up?_

_"Can't you tell the difference between werewolves and Lycans…?" _

_"NO,_ also I want to tell you that you have some nerve to plummet me!"

_"Of all the vampires and mages I could have been stuck with,_ I had to get stuck with the _idiotic_ type. Emphasis is on _idiot."_ Seraphine snarled through the fishing net, she knew that Darkovia was full of blood-sucking fiends.

But she never knew they were this dim, maybe Teretis was one of the newer generations that spawned.

* * *

Just then there was a loud chuckle from the bushes as Kabroz sauntered out...

"Meheeeheehe!" the animal chuckled in an annoying voice,

the two Sub-races blinked dolefully as if they were fish caught in a net.

Kabroz's eyes were a startling red as he glared up at the two unusual specimens, his Moglin nose was sharp.  
"What do we have here?" the Moglin muttered fiendishly,

"my brother never told me about those strange beings. Maybe they're feral humans." (Seraphine groaned)

"Excuse me, my good Moglin." Teretis offered in respite, "You do us a favour?"

The eyes turned a freakishly green colour, _"Good?!"_ Kabroz screamed,

"You think I'm in the league of the good Moglin? As a punishment for such insolate names, I shall cast you and the _beast_ to be bound together with a restraint order…!"

_"Hey, it's not his fault he has the brain of Undead Frogzard," _pointed out Seraphine in glee.

But already, she felt her anger dissipate and she morphed back to human female again.

Kabroz threw a carbon crystal at them and cast the spell.

"I hope this restraining order means that we don't end up like _The Odd Couple."_

"You've seen the _film?"_ asked Teretis in amazement, "But there's no TV."

"Oh yeah, I forgot Undead can't comprehend these technology." Kabroz yelled.

"You're weird," commented Teretis off-handed.

* * *

Meanwhile, the Rogue Keliare was thoroughly miffed.

Not only did she just got resurrected by the Queen, she was expected to obey the gothic Queen's orders

worse still, she was trapped in the body of a ninja-assassinating _cat…_

She could've laughed at the irony, but only her terror prevented her from acting out her thoughts.

Keliare wanted to have her original body back.

True it was ordinary and plain; however she longed how she could swing her limbs around and the agility… Most of all, she missed her white and purified hair that she kept neatly in a short fashion.

She remembered Lord Cyrus when he bestowed onto her the abilities of Dragon-kind.

The rogue missed his philosophical voice and how he kindly gave her armour.

* * *

_You know why I chose you?_

As if the Queen reading her thoughts, Keliare was shocked into reality.

The vision dissipated to be replaced by the Queen's image.

_I expect you to be confounded by my regal plans for vampire-kind. _

_Therefore, my sweet ninja cat I shall tell you the current campaign. _

_You Keliare were loaned to me by Reaper because I had bribed him for your supple body. _

_I can command you to do duties the other worthless skinks wouldn't diverge. _

_Plus, the dragoness heritage in your line means that you are a worthy opponent against Lycan-kind. _

_Your duties are this: Step into the dojo of Kroves-port. There the Lycans reside._

The Queen laughed haughtily as Keliare scowled in a catlike way.

_And what do you expect me to do? The Lycan tribe will tease me!_ Keliare shouted.

"Lycans are afraid of felines; they rage against them and go feral at the sight."

_I see… Then what are your commands?_ Keliare could see where this was heading.

"While the Lycans are distracted, utilise your Dragon-Ninja-cat status and knock Alpha Were-King down. This'll allow time for glorious Vampires to strike."

_But what you're doing is insane, there will be havoc and blood will be spilt…!_

"All the better," replied the Queen, "Lust for blood strengthens Vampire's health and make them battle more furiously. Vampire-kind will reign supreme after that."

* * *

_This will include GENOCIDE?! _Keliare yelled in her thoughts.

"Yes," gloated the Queen, "And after that, Night-bane the Were-pyre will become _King of Darkovia_ & Ill be the _Queen of Darkovia…!"_

Keliare couldn't BELIEVE what she was hearing from the Queen… She felt like covering her face.

"Our kind will soon spread throughout Battleon, the Undead shall begin…!"

"Wait," said Grim-Weld, "We seem to have a new recruit." He pointed at a Paladin.


	4. Shadowing

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

Seraphine was less than impressed with the new circumstances that were ahead. Not only was Tetris lagging along, she officially wished that Kabroz was back with his brother where both of them belonged – in their hideout.

Cutting free of the net's bonds she tossed aside the remainder of the threads and stood up sulkily.

"Not so confident anymore, eh Slayer," mocked Tetris behind her back, "looks like your egoism has been kicked down a notch." The only reply was a slight silence followed by a whisk of air as Seraphine adjusted her uniform.

"Well, let's see what other jokes I have for you, Slayer…" the mage grinned, revealing his yellowish incisors. _"What do you get when you cross wolf with wetsuits…?"_ he offered cheerfully, "A Wash-and-wear wolf!"

"Very funny," said Seraphine with oblivious sarcasm in her voice…

"_What do you call a vampire with a straw?_ A _sucker…!"_ she commented.

It took Tetris at least two minutes to realise that the teen was referring to him…

"You remind me of someone I knew of a long time ago," mused Tetris angrily, "Her name was _Buffy_ and she hunted our kind for a living_…"_ The mage stormed off in the other direction, only to notice something weird occurring to his feet…

Even though the mage was actually walking forwards, some strong magnetic attraction was dragging him back to his original starting point. "Seraphine!" Tetris wailed, "Do something…! Anything…" Instantly, as if the name was the catalyst, the force immediately stopped dragging his feet. Seraphine noticed his terrified reaction to the supernatural phenomenon and paused in her own direction.

"What is it this time, Tetris?" she said consolingly, a tone she never used unless she was addressing humans. Tetris just pointed at the twin tracks that were created in the sand where his feet were dragged within several seconds... Seraphine stared. _What in Slayer D's oath have occurred? Did Kabroz put that restraining order?_

"So it means we're stuck together for the rest of our journey," Mage Tetris shrugged as Seraphine looked even more furious than he ever thought possible.

"KABROZ!!!!!" Suddenly a flock of owls from a Deadwood tree nearby burst into flight at the loudness of the female's projected voice.

* * *

_About 3000 years ago in outer space…_

"Have you set the coordinates correctly Worsh?" asked Star-Captain Sys-Zero.

The handsome brown-haired pilot nodded briefly as he glanced towards the asteroid belt.

The pilot wasn't exactly focused on the job, he was steering the _Gamma_ ship with white knuckles, casually looking over his shoulder.

Senior-Pilot Worsh was hoping that when they landed at their new destination, it wouldn't be an absolute disaster… Given his previous hover-craft records, he had previously crashed into three minivans in the last year.

Worsh winced at the single thought as an amateur entered through the cockpit. Recognising the student, he waved at the seat next to him as his firefly buzzed around his head. "Hi there," The pilot greeted the student with flame red hair.

"What's up with the gnarly signals Worsh?" Vixen stated as she was seated across the cockpit, Worsh winked at the familiar sight of a student as _his_ equal… Judging from the way her posture bent, that student was eager to drive the _Gamma!_

"How's it going with Devi Whirl and Misako Irwa?" Worsh requested; he was curious about the going on of students milling around in the 'control room'… Vixen was his only link to the 'control room' which was guarded from the staff.

"They're cool with everything; Devi keeps going on about a _new_ haircut though."

"Why? Doesn't he like his hairdo? I think it's awesome," Worsh turned around. Instantly, there was an order from Sys-Zero being broadcasted over the system:

_Worsh, what the heck are you doing? Get back to steering the Gamma NOW!_

Ignoring Sys-zero without a word, Worsh handed the controls to Vixen.

"Worsh, what do you _expect_ me to do? Drive the Gamma?" Worsh nodded,  
"Oh great," responded Vixen sarcastically, "Handing the ship to a total amateur."

"Just drive it next to that swirlier hole over there."

9


	5. Recount

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"_Ode to Safira, she just grows nearer, lalala- deedeee!"_

For what seemed like the tenth time Tetris was getting on her nerves.

For a dim bloodsucker, Tetris really knew how to turn the volume up…

This time however, Seraphine wasn't even going to bother answering his complaints, she simply had to relax and this total _idiot_ was only making things worse for the Slayer.

Her inky black hair streamed as the female just gritted her teeth in great annoyance.

This had got to stop.

_Why couldn't she at least end up with a handsome mage who knew it all?_

Behind her, Tetris was singing a Darkovian aria that he composed himself.

His singing was extra terrible as several Eyes fell out of the sky; apparently stunned.

"Tetris are you going to be like this? Warlic can probably help."

Tetris paused for a moment before being dragged by the spell. "Yes- aahhh!"

"So, if you're a wolf Lycan, then how come your form is like a collie?" Tetris demanded insistently. "And what clan are you from and other stuff?"

The mage was curious about this strange sub-race Seraphine hailed from.

The Slayer smirked, he was really pushing her privacy and she didn't want to share this information with a weird leeching Mage. Finally, she gave in if only for his sake.

As they were walking along a dirt-brick road, Seraphine recounted.

It was an intensely sunny day and Tetris wondered why it was always sunlight outside his native home. He was starting to fall into deep plot holes in the road.

"Okay, don't tell anyone but there are different types of Lycan clans. Some of them have different regulations. I have hailed from the _Faluno_ clan."

"I was walking near Nightbane's fortress when a bodybuilder Lycan warrior happened to be lurking around that area just sniffing for scraps."

"Ironically, he wasn't even pure-blooded; he was just a stray whelping that was kicked out of his own clan for a disgrace. Turns out that his bloodline was collie or something similar."

Tetris stared in dumb amazement.

"So, long storyline short?" he said as he happened to walk into a heavily guarded sun-wasp's nest.

Seraphine grinned as Tetris yelped with pain. "It's not funny!" he wailed as he slapped wildly at them.

"I'm just laughing because of your expression…" Seraphine replied.

"Anyway I was going to finish this Lycan off, but he charged at my pet Gizzard, Celadon. This Lycan was immensely rabid at the moment and before I knew it, he had my head in some sort of grip-lock and brought me down to my knees."

She paused for some dramatic effect and some creepy music in the background.

"And then that's it?!" Tetris yelled, "Boy, you're sure are a storyteller!"

"I've fought more battles than you can count. This Lycan was drooling and I could see every single fang in his furry maw. And before you know it, done. I'm just a whelp by Lycan standards anyway."

Tetris could see that the female said it in a matter-of-fact voice, like it was something that she had been expecting all along. He wondered what was on her mind right now; he would even give his yellow fang-molars to know.

An inner thirst told him to slake some fluids off, so he took a huge sachet of congealed-hermagoblin and gulped it down greedily. He always took precaution.

Seraphine was watching in disgust, wrinkling her nose –

She could barely stand the putrid stench congealed-hermagoblin gave out.


	6. Crashland

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"Vixen, I told you three times already." Worsh yelled into the co-pilot's ears.

"Remember that the comet's trajectory is equal to the amount of thrust you force into the control input!"

The spaceship erratically hovered from one route to another, bouncing like a pinball machine stuck on hyper-mode. Vixen glared at the greenish holographic screen in vain, trying to figure out the quickest route to Soluna City.

"It is so firkin' hard with all those asteroids near _our_ viewing screen!"

The amateur swore loudly as Worsh started to look worried...

Would this look good on _his_ driving records?

He just hoped that this 'incident' wouldn't go into the databases of Soluna Police Department.

Vixen managed to steer the ship's booster out of a stray comet's tail, the thrusters started sparking as the cabin lights in the student dorm gave one last flicker.

Misako was chatting to Sally the coffee-addicted girl when this event happened.

"So Sally, as I was saying a moment ago… I can't wait to get to Soluna City."

Misako stated as she leant on the coffee machine.

"What jobs they have in this city – I wonder if there is an energy weapon class? Those werewolf bikers better run when they see _Officer Misako _with a light sabre."

Misako mimicked holding an invisible staff, she duelled as the rest of the students stared.

"Light sabre? Ha!" laughed Ping and Ron, the two twins who played Ping-Pong.

"Officer Misako at your service," they jeered as the lights went out for the final time.

"What happened to these lights?!"

Suddenly, Devi gave yells as the HAL machine blanked out in the middle of cutting his brand new hairstyle.

"Help, HAL got stuck in my newly permed horns! AAHHH!! My freaking hair, noooo!! You stupid machine; why won't you _work!"_

Tek and her Farbit entered the compartment to find that Devi was tangled amongst the red menacing scissors and metal wires as the faulty machine whirred and clicked its shears.

"I guess the comet impact is causing irreversible damage to the Gamma,"

"Whatever, ya please gets me out of these blades!!!" Devi snapped at Tek.

"Okay, but don't blame me for your new hair." Tek started snipping…

"NOOO!!! MY HAIR; my smexy ivory haaaairrr!!!"


	7. Iron Mecha

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

**Note:** Going for a more serious approach this chapter...!

"ARRROOWW!!!" Sharp howls yelled out from Darkovian plains, increasing in tempo as it reached vampire-slayers' ears. It was a half-moon tonight.

Inhuman wolves prowled the district, raising their heads in an augmented union.

Their orbs widened as distant stars caught Lycan admiration, ivory claws glinting.

Some of the Lycans were sitting on their haunches, while others retained their human postures and original hair colour. _"Hail Celestia!"_ yelled the Were-King.

_It was THAT night,_ groaned Slayer E as he watched human-transformations.

Because of the rapid growth of muscle and razor claws, most of the Lycans ripped their own clothes to shreds. Younger 'whelps' shook off the clothes as easily as a Flibbly-gibbet out of a cocoon. More experienced 'leaders' mended their clothes.

The unnamed Alpha surveyed his vast tribe; they were all from his tribe and they served under his judgemental rule, although exceptions presented a problem.

The random hubbub the animals were creating made many slayers sit up at their posts.

Slayer Theodosius rubbed his eyes blearily as sudden screams of jubilation tore his ears.

Those cries made him cross and snappy because of the sheer volume.

He could have been enjoying nice cups of chocolate by a roaring fire at Frostvale, but _no_ this particular night really cheesed him off! Granted, night was _always_ here in Darkovia.

Slayer T rolled his eyes in recognition; _those Lycans are playing up again._

This male slayer could tell each Lycan's call individually, depending on pitch.

"Shut your trap, Alpha Alphonse!" he screamed at the rousted burdened beasts as they ignored him. Hopefully the lowly beasts would just _shut up_ and let him sleep.

The teenage slayer tried to throw rocks at them; they missed and hit Slayer A.

"OW! Why did you do that, slayer T?" The fragile girl snapped at him.

T paused while he apologised to her. A red blush rose up his pale cheeks.

"_Rostrum_ tribe are acting up, those party animals been howling all night."

"I can see that," replied Armidale as she glanced in the Lycan's direction.

"_Rostrum_ tribe's district is bordering on _Faluno's_ territories." She was definitely trying to make conversation during frost-filled evenings, however T was grouchy.

"What's the point of this slaying job if we have to stay out nights in frozen frost?" Slayer T grumbled as he settled in for the night.

* * *

Snow started to fall densely in large clumps which caused A to shiver in fright.

"I see something!" screamed Slayer A as startled T fell from his post.

"Where is that monster?" exclaimed T as a dark shadow blackened the moon.

"That's it!" yelled A when an unimaginable metallic figure crashed through trees...

It was roughly ten feet in height which made the humans look puny and weak.

Worst, it had a bubblegum-pink haired lady in its grasp…

Slayer T looked upwards to see a huge iron giant. "WAARRGH!" he cried.

"Don't be afraid," boomed the gigantic red Mecha with the white iron claws,

"Devi not here to fight; I simply want your attention." T cowered in its sight.

Devi was sitting in the pilots' compartment and he was thinking: _Firkin cowards._

"What do you want from us, O godlike giant?" asked Armidale softly as if she feared its wrath. "Just lowly Slayers with disputable reputations." She added.

At this response the male pilot laughed.

This conversation was turning out great!

_The Slayers are worshipping us? Just what Tek ordered!_

He felt like winking at Tek.

* * *

Unfortunately, Devi forgot that he didn't turn off the PA volume knob and his loud laugh echoed throughout the wide Darkovian landscape.

"Oops," he added shyly.

"That thing's evil!" gasped Armidale, "Are you related to Arikoth by chance?"

A maniac gleam came over the Slayer's face and the two reached for the weapons.

Tek stirred and glared at Devi's mecha, "Now's a good chance to run!" she told.

"WHERE DO I GO?" yelled Devi as A sheathed her best _500 Wolf-bane gun._

"Just run!" Tek yelled as she rode on the Mecha's back, "We have to find Worsh!"

"They're attacking, this future is nuts!" swore Devi as Tek yelled at the Slayers.

"What did you expect?" asked Tek sarcastically.

* * *

Suddenly, a huge menacing shadow swooped over them and the Slayers ran for cover in renewed panic. "Dragon Ninja-cat!" they yelled as the shadow took form...

"_Wace?"_ Tek's eyes widened as she gripped Devi's mecha.

The ninja cat was not normal, its eyes glowed green as blue dragon wings began sprouting from its back. Its twin eyes flared. At once two shining daggers appeared in the smallish rounded paws. It would have looked kitsch if not for the fact that this was serious situation.

"A human." The Ninja-cat spoke in a harsh voice as it approached them silently.

Tek screamed in shock. "Why is this weird black cat talking?" she demanded loud.

"What did you call me, human?" the hybrid cat asked coldly. Tek shuddered.

"Nothing," Tek glanced upwards hopefully, frantically waiting for Devi's mecha.

What was taking the pilot so firkin long? "What are you anyway?" she shivered.

Tek was taking a long time to adjust to the intense coldness of the snow…

Wearing a short tank top along with her bright vermillion overalls didn't help at all...!

The very question seemed to surprise the creature, it had a sorrowful look.

Flakes drifted down as the Ninja-cat hissed, it refused to answer her question at first.

"I am a _slave_ to vampire Queen Safira," it said finally. "Name is Keliare."

Tek was silent for a minute – she didn't want to remind the cute but deadly creature of its original motives, she watched the held blades in apprehension.

The human felt pity for this totally bizarre cattish figure, even if said beast was holding blades. "What became of you, then?" Tek asked as Devi's mecha stood impatiently waiting for orders.

"You don't want to know," said Keliare darkly, Tek looked uncomfortable, what was it?

"Don't worry, I'm not ordered to hunt _your kind_ down, Safira has someone _quite_ different in mind."

The minute figure rose on wings of earth-bound flight as it left Tek, going in the other direction. Tek glanced as shortly howls erupted from the heart of the forest...

"Keliare, what a strange name." commented Tek, "I wonder if I'll see her again..."


	8. Why Frostvale?

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"Happy Frostvale!" greeted Hans as he sighted the long awaited return of Seraphine, but the mysterious lady seemed to have someone darkly trailing as she swooped into the now familiar Inn.

Seraphine sighed in relief, _finally _she can rest. She threw herself promptly into a nice woollen chair and draped a blanket around her bare legs, shivering. "It's cold out there...!"

"How was your journey to Darkovia?" questioned Aquella warmly as she glanced at the Slayer's chocolate eyes. Seraphine's eyes lighted up when she heard the water elf.

"Disastrous to say the least. Things didn't work out quite as planned," she sighed.  
It was then that the aquamarine elf noticed the newcomer with the Slayer.

Aquella quirked her eyebrow; "Was that because of this hungry guy over here?"

The aquatic humanoid pointed to the window where Tetris was salivating at Aria.  
He was muttering something under hissing breaths, "Aria's juicy, tender neck…"

No comment, but an exaggerated roll of the eyes. "Yes, that idiotic person,"

"I see, the _idiot_ must be new to Battleon," Aquella worriedly accentuating her fear.

"Did you hear the rumours?" Robina spoke up. "I've heard that this ship crashed."  
She lifted her arms to emphasize the size of the vessel, but overbalanced. "Whoa!"

"Arh," commented Captain Rhubarb as he chewed on his jet pipe. "It be pirates?"

Robina could have punted him on the head, "No, silly! It's a strange space-ship!"  
Rhubarb smiled cheerfully but his expression was somewhat sober. "Really."

But no one noticed that the back-door was now open, leaving deep tracks in the snow...

* * *

Pet-shop keeper Aria was terrified of vampiric teenager as he tried to inch towards the tightly monitored shop, failing only because of the intense spell Kabroz placed on him.

Tetris cursed his insanely bad-luck.

"Must get sustenance," Gritted fangs snarled as he pawed his way through _Gargoyle-Kibbles_ placed outside the store.

"Hello!" Miss Aria hollered, "Is anyone willing to buy my pet products?"

Tetris grinned; his luck may have just turned. It was then the vampire realised he was still wearing his mage robes and vampire armour.

"I'll just take this off."

The dim one wiggled out of his comfortable armour, carefully placing under snow-covered rocks thoughtfully placed there by a stranger. _Was Seraphine in the inn?_

Mage Tetris brushed his hair downwards and retracted his incisors, making it short and presentable. Now he looked unrecognisable, and with any luck that Lycan Slayer won't be here to see his new meal. The lust for a meal satiated his appetite somewhat and he hummed cheerfully and sang in a deep throated soprano voice.

"_I am here, have no fear, cause I have a sick… uh, Trobble!"_ Smiled once more.

* * *

At this, Aria's eyes widened. She loves Trobbles and they were all so _fluffy!_

Excitedly she fumbled with various door-locks. One by one they fell on the floor.

"Trobbles?" Her various creatures piled behind Aria with wide-eyed innocence.

"Don't worry, dear pets. He only wants to cure his Trobble!" Aria squealed gaily.

At once, Tetris stepped into the shop. "Good afternoon, miss." He said politely.

The flame-haired store owner stocked up various items in front of the stranger.

"Let's see, I have supplies of Trobble medicine, leg splinters." Their eyes met.

Aria blushed and looked away, as though she just saw something. "So, it's ok?"

"Yeah, my voice sounds pretty hoarse after that singing." Tetris confessed.

She giggled bubbly, "No silly! I meant your fluffy little pet!"

Aria's cheery voice seemed docile and very innocent.

"My Grams say the best treatment for beastly injuries is nettle ointment."

The girl then remembered something, "Are you from around Warlic's shop?"  
It was then that Tetris lost his composition. "Er, yes. I'm the Archmage-assistant."

Which wasn't far from the truth, he _was_ a mage after all doing random quests.

"No wonder." She bent down to inspect her storage of herbal pills.

* * *

Tetris felt his excitement growing sharply.

While she wasn't looking he lengthened his fangs, feeling the incisors slide down his pale gums and past his chin.

It was so long since he last drank, weeks spent with Seraphine made his thirst cry out more.

The mage remembered his last conversation with the Slayer; she had scolded Tetris for his sinful ways and made him take a long oath not to drink any virgin.

_Well, now it was revoked._

Grabbing Aria's shoulders, he sank them into the neck.

* * *

_BoOM!_

Screeching, Tetris dropped the virgin. "Holy mackerel!" he shouted.

Warlic was glaring at him with a stern expression full of fury. "Tetris?"

At once Seraphine dashed onto the scene, she was holding a bow full of ice quivers.

"Tetris, you dumb son of a Minotaur." She cursed, pulling the vampire's ears.

Being a Lycan meant that nails were razor sharp, of course humans didn't know.

Ears ringing, Tetris was shameful. "I was just thirsty, Warlic!" he begged.

"Begging won't do it Tetris," snapped Warlic, "I demand the full story."

"Fine, Seraphine and I met when we got caught in a net. Kabroz came along and bind us together with a _firkin_ spell of his. We've been travelling together for the past six weeks, plus this Slayer's getting on my nerves! Oh, we talked about TV."

At his insult Seraphine pulled his ears even harder, "What did you say?!"

* * *

"Wait, you guys got caught in a net? Don't you mean Internet?" Warlic smiled.

Seraphine laughed, "Yes, funny story that. I'm Seraphine Newt," Tetris chuckled.

"I'm totally serious, that's my full name." she growled. At this revelation, two mages laughed even harder, until their faces turned totally purple.

"Miss Newt? That's the weirdest name." Warlic spluttered as he gasped.

"So, what did your parents call you," demanded Seraphine. He blushed redder.

"Archmage Warlic Blancmange." Warlic groaned. "It's the worst name."

"Aha, see I told you so." Seraphine tittered, hiding her smile.

Aria stirred from her trance, Warlic helped her up. "Luckily my shop's near you."

"But I'm still thirsty!" wailed Tetris. The female Slayer slapped him hard thrice.

"That's your punishment for breaking our oath." Seraphine winked at Warlic.

"Come into my shop you two, tell me about yourselves." Warlic offered.

* * *

_Meanwhile in Darkovia…_

Nightbane was impatient; the last campaign plan didn't go very well. Frustrated, the Dracoprye roared for his servants. Juan stepped forwards, "Yes?"

"Bring me the legendary Protean-Pilot," demanded Nightbane.

"I need this strange weapon's presence." It was then that Worsh was tossed into the room, cowering before the fearsome draconic beast. He ran for cover at Nightbane's curled fangs.

"Please don't hurt me!" screamed poor Worsh, still covered in Protean-ooze…  
"I'm just a lowly Mecha Pilot!" It was then that he saw something pulsating and he squealed.

"Shut up!" yelled Nightbane, "Now, tell me what this is!" he lashed his tail.

Paladin Juan interrupted briefly, "I think it's from a ruined space-ship."

"Yeah, it's brain-slug!" screeched Worsh, terrified of the inky creature.

"Brain-slug," At this Nightbane's eyes flashed demonically. "It's an alien?"

"_Alvenos__! Wace Dakittu Shigu."_ The brain-slug spoke illogically.

"AAAHH!" yelled Worsh, "It lives!" Nightbane snarled, laughing loudly.

"This Alien may just let me have the upper hand on Darkovia. Queen Safira will now love me for this campaign. The Werewolf King better tremble! Down with the Lycans!"


	9. Potent Potions

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

**Author's Notes: **Yes, this is mainly to do with the long forgotten past of our favourite sarcastic Slayer. Plus, a very superstitous Valencia Surehunter gets the shock of her life after the events of this chapter...! Meeheehee. Can she handle meeting... her great-great grandma?!

Doppelganger: (definition) A person who is an exact duplicate of a person and who acts and talks like them. Legend has it if you run into your doppelganger, bad luck and tragedy will rain down upon you.

_

* * *

_

_A dark human figure upon a steed of pale ivory rode down the steep hillside, his cloak billowing in the non-existent wind. No one recognised where this person had hailed from, however most Undead in Darkovia spoke his name with familiar dread. _

_They called him Artix Krieger of the Golden Order. He rode onwards frantically across valleys and castles of eons long ago. Never pausing, not once he stopped._

"_Savant Zaru" he hollered as he sped down the hills as a fiery white star. As the dark figure leapt over a gully of inconceivable depths, his Nightmare steed neighed. _

"_A message for you from past war decrees of Alpha Wilcox." Haunting grey eyes were waxen with tears as Zaru surveyed the male Paladin, trembling as he read. _

"_My wife, Lucile Trelicvor? Is she alright?" Mage Zaru questioned weakly. Artix put his hand on the stained parchment, "I'm sorry, I don't know how she joined their cultish Order. She gave her love to him" Zaru gripped the hands in fervour, pleading._

"_No! If my relatives knew of this incident, I'll bring dishonour upon our entire bloodline. Dear Lucile had an illegal affair with that damned Eros, isn't that wrong!"_

_Artix paled. "Did she already give birth?" Zaru asked the dark shining Paladin. There was no need for him to speak, he already knew the truth. It chilled him. _

_Eros Newt was a charming, docile Slayer who Zaru mistrusted after a tavern brawl involving a flask of 'Vintage Xeric'. Drunken Eros was in a tipsy mood and slapped Zaru clumsily. It soon started a fight involving magical orbs and flashy fencing coming from both parties. At this moment, Zaru's outlook was undeniably changed. _

_He saw a smile on his wife's face, eyeing Eros with simpering nonchalant expression. According to the Mage, Slayers were slimy misfits of Battleon. Zaru couldn't possibly imagine what Lucile saw in Eros or whether it was his charm or foresight. _

_It caused the mage to angrily scold his wife after various incidents involving late forays into Darkovian territory, with an excuse each time. "Potions, herbilogy."_

_Lucile's silken buttery hair framed a passionate face, doe eyes filled with ardour. Elder Zaru was desperate to make the lady stay by his side. Alas, it was never to be. Having enough of the frequent scolding Zaru administered, dear Lucile had fled deep into woods months earlier, claiming love for Eros and him only._

"_It's a girl, I think. I'm sorry about this tragedy. Lucile said that Eros will raise it."_

"_What will I tell my own son? That he has a half-sister that he doesn't know about?"_

_Artix leant on his axe of gold, he was silent, a plaintive sigh came out of his mouth. He was obliviously thinking of a way to make up for Zaru's unfortunate path, his mouth set in an uncharacteristic grimace. "There is little you can do to redeem yourself, Mage Zaru. It is of Eros's own doing." At this, Zaru nodded sternly. _

"_However, your son need never know about this incident, if in his youth he takes the path of a just and mighty Paladin. It is the least I can do to repay your services."_

_Zaru's hands shook, he looked at Artix. "Gratitude, friend Artix. The new pact?"_

_Artix smiled, placing a silvery hand on the handsome mage's light red hair._

_A rustle of the cloak and Zaru ushered his young son forwards, rusty hair sticking._

"_On this day henceforth Artix pledges a new Paladin of the Golden Order! Your name youthful boy?" Artix bent down on one knee, kindly smiling. "Juan Luxor Trimphant."_

"_Welcome to my Golden Order, youthful Paladin Juan. Thou shall learn from me."_

* * *

Lucile smiled wanly, as she hushed her little infant. A mess of dark hair stuck up from the newborn's head, reminding Lucile of Eros's own unique hairstyle. 

"How 'bout Cybele?" said a Slayer jokingly, "Yes, that would work real fine!"

"Cybele is such an old fashioned name," commented Lucile, "I want nobility."

"Nobility?" repeated Slayer Winter, "Heh, why don't you just ask Quasar?"

"Why should I ask Quasar?" asked Lucile, "It's not as if she has good suggestions."

"Whatever," Eros groaned. "Give a Hellhound a good name and it'll follow you."

"You give such excellent advice," smirked Winter, "I can't wait to see the name."

"What was that?" asked Eros, "Listen, I fathered this child and what goes stays."

Winter then launched into a 'war of names' with Eros, her cloak whisking.

"How 'bout Nephrite or Tanzania?" Winter laughed haughtily, "Real catchy."

Eros shook his head before yelling his choice. "Argentine and Penelope are better." Winter looked like she had been hit with a brick before choosing her next names.

"What about Saluki, Hanoi or Lysander?" challenged Slayer W as she smiled.

"Antis, Nature or Junos." Eros Newt stated quietly. He was sick of shouting.

_Getting ridiculous, at this point the child won't have a name till after Harvest!_

"Filipe would be great name." Winter suggested. Lucile shook her head, "No way."

A few days later, Eros was officially tired of suggesting names.

"Quiet you all!" yelled Polo, "I have a really good idea." The slayers grumbled.

"We'll just vote. Who thinks Arles is a cool name!" A raised hand from miss Winter.

"Taels, is an awesome name." No one raised their hands, much to Polo's dismay.

"Fleiss, Natimuk or Seraphine." Lucile was startled, finally someone had chose name.

"Polo, I think everyone likes that name," Lucile pointed out as everyone raised their hand. "Seraphine sounds like word _Seraphim,_ so I'll vouch for that name."

All heads were turned. "Yeah," commented another person, "That sounds cool!"

* * *

"Welcome to my abode of mystical alchemy." Warlic introduced as the draped curtain wavered, holding a hushed vigil over the darkened temple-like room. Tetris entered cautiously and then eyes widened in wonder. "Potion ingredients!" Slow but devilish smile crept on the vampire's face as he fingered Mermazon kelp. 

Immediately Archmage twitched and his hair stuck up like cat's fur.

"Tetris, I'll rather you don't touch that!" strained Warlic, his face bleached.

"Aw, when I was your apprentice, I always get to experiment!" Tetris wailed.

Warlic gave a ferocious glare that reminded Seraphine of a barn owl she saw.

"Then you failed to obey my exact instructions the last time I heard?" Warlic snapped, "I was worried that you had wandered off heading for trouble!"

"Sorta. I saw pretty cool-looking lady with hot fangs," Tetris grinned. "She had fishnet stockings, wild dark hair and crimson eyes. Plus an awesome red dress,"

"Wow," commented Warlic as he mixed a bubbling potion, "Sounds real romantic."

"That was over two years ago, pity that. I'll be nearing my 193rd birthday soon – of course, being immortal means age doesn't matter. I'm real dumb for my age…!"

Seraphine froze in shock, _it couldn't be._ "Tetris." She muttered to his ears only, "Lady sent to dispatch Lycans?" Warlic gave her an odd look as if to say _what?_

"Never mind, Warlic." Trying to change the subject, Seraphine blushed meekly.

"Hey, what's on the shelf? Wow, cactus juice!"

She read the faded label: _Only apply to insolent/annoying rabbles._ "What the-? Rabbles," Intrigued, she looked at Warlic.

"A fad, everyday everyone thinks there's dazzle to magic…" Archmage shouted as he picked up the empty jar.

"Sheesh, Adventurers pawn my place like fire ants."

"Make yourself useful for a change, Seraphine. Sit down and don't meddle." Archmage Warlic ordered as he left the room. Behind him, Tetris pulled a face.

"Hah! Blue-mage Warlic can't see _everything_ that happens while he's gone." Vampire mage chuckled as he turning his back on the female Slayer. "Heheheh."

Being curious, Seraphine peered over the apprentice's shoulder.

"What is that gloop?!"

"Green hair would make you prettier?" commented Tetris with a concealed smirk.

"What!" exclaimed the Slayer, imagining with horror the resulting makeover; she would never wash all that hair dye off…!

Anyway she hated green. "Warlic said-"

"Who cares Warlic said?" Tetris hooted, "Besides, I _worked_ for him, Lycan."

"Specifically referred to not conjuring up ingredients," Seraphine spoke logistically, her dark hair shining as Tetris dabbled in various herbs. Warlic would be displeased.

"Fine, Tetris. Bear consequences of your actions." She shrugged; this vampire might become so low on blood-sugar that he just couldn't think straight this time.

If most of descending blood-suckers of Darkovia had this low IQ, Seraphine wasn't surprised that they got themselves into a lot of trouble with the other Slayers often…

Plus, their ability to drain life from Adventurers made them rivals.

"Yay, a dash of this and a smidge of balderdash." Tetris giggled femininely.

_SPLOOSH! _

An explosion rocked the place and hair potion splashed everywhere.

Seraphine glared at Tetris, who was beside himself with laughter. "Haha, your hair!"

"My hair, what in LORE did you do to it!" she muttered, realising the problem.

"Tetris, you shouldn't have," the girl wailed melodramatically.

Just then Warlic re-entered his shop. Tetris's eyes widened.

_That Archmage has worst possible timing!_

"What in Battleon had you done Tetris?"  
Warlic screamed, clutching his hair.

"_My lovely shop!"_

"I leave you two alone for _twenty minutes_ and this chaos results."

The entire shop was now covered in ghastly lurid green dye as it covered illegible labels.

Now it was Tetris's turn to gulp in apprehension.  
"Oh boy, I'm in major trouble?"

"I have good mind not to give Tetris his Frostvale presents!" Warlic boomed as magic surrounded his form.

"No fair! I always get Darkovian presents from my Queen."

Disgruntled, the old Archmage dumped a large heavy looking present in front of Seraphine, "Here, you have it."

"Thanks, Warlic. I can't wait to open them." She whispered as she unwrap them.

There was look of rapture on her face, "Great, Blowout shield for Earth attack!"

Until she opened that _other_ present, unfolding her new pink 'bunnies-costume'. "Wow," The teenage girl stated sarcastically, "Just what I _always_ wanted."

Warlic finally looked glad, "It's the least I can get you." He bowed gravely.

"No offence Archmage, but was that costume meant for him?" she made a quick motion towards idiotic Tetris and then Warlic nodded. She sighed. "Oh well."

Tetris tried to muster some dregs out of chicken-noodle soup; Archmage noticed and tossed a glass of tomato juice at him. Happily youthful vampire drank it down.

"There, that will keep you quiet, by the way. Nice hair miss Newt." She blushed as Tetris sulked in his corner.

* * *

_Meanwhile…_  
Legendary treasure hunter, miss Valencia came up the hill with Grumbles, her lizard of burden in tow. Her flying Moglin meeped insistently on her shoulder...

"Just a few more stops until the next city." She whooped.  
_Meep! Meep, meprit!_ Truffles squeaked, pointing towards a figure in distance.

"Wow! A huge machine," gasped the violet rogue as suddenly the robot stopped in front of the rag torn trio. _Meep!_ Truffles pointed as the red robot ejected a female-mechanic sporting bubblegum pink hair.  
"Hello!" yelled the familiar looking teenager at Valencia.  
_"Wace?_ You look similar to me, what is going on here?!"

At once, Valencia seemed to jump a mile in the air.  
"A doppelganger!" she shrieked, "AAAAHHH!"


	10. High oh, Lolosia away!

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

"… Basically your root dialect is mostly similar to ours, but from Soluna to Lore, words got lost over years of mistranslation due to the transgenic reset." Tek finished her lecture on Soluna...

"For goodness sake, speak more simply." Valencia stated in her confusion. Listening to the roundabout conversation made her even more excited to tell the others about the discovery.  
"So you're saying that your Soluna-city clans _could_ be ancestorial... Somehow warped here along with twenty other students, and there were robots and cool stuff?" questioned Valencia.

"Yes, that's the gist of it," Tek said as she unsheathed her large spanner on her back;  
"Where's Dean Warlic by the way?" Valencia's eyes gleamed. "Aha, I knew that person!"  
"Warlic?" continued Valencia, "He's not a Dean and I still think he's an Archmage."  
"_Meep!"_ said small flying Truffles as she sped behind its owner, terrified of the green and flying space-rabbit floating nearby, the Farbit tsked in amusement as it glared at the Moglin.

"Enough chatting," stated Valencia as Tek was awed by the huge monster behind her...  
"Time to see what _rare items_ you have brought from the past!" Devi laughed in glee as Tek dropped several technologically advanced items from her satchel, polishing each of them one at a time, a Photon-Phaser and Smokey-Flamethrower among them, "Here."

Devi's face looked alarmed. "Disrupting normalcy of our time-flow aren't we? I still don't think that's good idea." He stated to Tek privately. "Tek, you heard of the _butterfly effect?"

* * *

_

On other side of Battleon, Tetris was looking pretty bored. He already finished Warlic's tomato juice which was cool and refreshing, but on the other hand he was waiting for-  
"How do I look?" ventured Seraphine timidly as she exited her simple tent... Instead of her normal Slayers outfit she wore the fuchsia bunny-jamas, plus she twirled her weapon twice.  
Tetris's response was burst out laughing as he crouched, "Ahahaha! You look _kyute!"_

Seraphine sighed in repressed frustration, "I took an hour for _this, Tetris!"_ she roared.  
Already; long collie hair was starting to grow along her arms and Tetris stopped laughing. "Alright, you shouldn't take that joke seriously!" he begged, "I just thought it looked-"

"_Kyute?"_ snarled Seraphine femininely, _"Whatever, I think you owe me an apology."  
_"Full moon fever," muttered Tetris to himself, _"Even worse_ than girl hormones."  
"_Alright, but watch your words, bloodsucker."_

Instantly she reverted back to human form, but only problem was she still had that brushy collie tail amongst her costume and furry soft ears sticking out of her head...  
Seraphine almost looked like a furry cos-player, albeit with realistic fur...!  
"Hey, now you appear cool!" remarked the vampiric mage, she smiled gratefully.

Then something stirred in Tetris's pocket, "A present for you." The apprentice offered.  
"Oooh, a pet rock." Seraphine observed. "Great, let me just get this to Valencia-"  
"-Stole it from Warlic's shop, hope he didn't mind." Tetris winked.  
There was a loud bellow from the other side of town... "Tetris!" stormed Warlic as he realised his potions and pet rocks were both missing from his store.

* * *

"Let's go," Seraphine said quickly as she dashed towards Valencia's spot. "Valley!"  
Somehow the Slayer realised the item hunter wasn't there. "Have you seen Valencia?"  
Robina was sharpening her arrows on a grinder, brown hair tucked behind her ears, "No."  
"Robina Hood, if you had some rescent news, I would gladly hear it," Seraphine calmly said. 

The female ranger was casually dressed with her hair down, it was still early morning...  
"Well," began Robina cheerfully, "Lolosia has been rebuilt after years of ruins, Graemor has just been destroyed by the Galin... Artix is wanting supporters of Battleon to help his cause."

"Lolosia? Isn't it that Seaport place with all the Windzards?" Seraphine cut in excitedly...  
"We could use a sea-change, both Tetris and I," she spoke out. "I think I have bad grammar."  
"Don't worry about it, even I have bad grammar," Robina winked at the female.  
"Why are we taling about pronouncation anyway?" wondered Tetris. The girls stared.  
"Where did you come from?!" shouted Seraphine, "I was having a conversation alone with good lady Robina... Unless you wanted to comment too." Tetris blanched out.

"Yeah, I think it would be a great holiday," pointed out Tetris, shuddering coldly:  
"all the cooling salty winds, blitsering sun and the surf... It can't be good for my skin...!"  
"I have a fairly pale complexion, so I think I should get a sunny tan," Seraphine laughed, hiding her furry ears so that Robina wouldn't see what sub-race she came from.  
"Do you want to get _skin cancer_? Well go ahead, you deserve a relaxing holiday after all that fighting." Robina stated, crossing her arms, "It's the only way to rest nowadays..."

"Hello guys!" Valencia burst into the town, towing all sorts of strange technology on Grumbles, "You'll never guess who I came across, I shall introduce miss Tek and Devi Whirl..."  
"These people came from this faraway place in some other continent...!" Tetris fainted in shock.  
_"WACE!"_ screamed Devi in total awe, "It's a rural town, coolskis-!" Seraphine sweatdropped.  
"It's rather homely, I've lived in Darkovia most of my life." The slayer introduced herself.  
"Well," chortled Devi, "It's rather different from Soluna-city," He began glancing around, delight filled his face "Wow, I never knew our future-town would be sooo... Medieval."

The others stared: "What?! Are those people from around here?" They glared at Valencia.  
"We need an explaination," the local residents muttered to the rare-item rogue, "Explain,"  
"This is going to take a while," sighed Tek as she relaxed on a bare log which then moved.  
_"Twilly doesn't like being sat on! Oh noes!"_ Twilly protested, leaping up in annoyance.  
"Sorry lil one," Tek apoligised, amidst Twilly growling in anger at the incident.  
_  
"Great, I get sat on, punted around and hurt from various injuries."_ The moglin squeaked.  
"Hey, do you speak?" Tek gasped in amazement, "Back in my day, I never saw one up close. Ramifications of Moglin autonomy never ceases to amaze me, even now..."  
Twilly healed himself, _"Don't speak techo-babble, miss Tek..."  
"I can't hardly understand your highly incomphrensible words! I can'y wait to see stuff." _

"Anyway, what is that _anyhow?"_ He pointed to the huge robotic structure and inched away...  
"That is a Mecha, a highly inconphensible piece of machinery." Tek used her natural prowness.  
"oooooh," Twilly was wowed by the robot, its eyes glinted. _"Twilly wants to play with it!"  
_"No way, _shimei!"_ Devi cried out, protecting it. "That's my mecha, now back off!" 

"Valencia, I have found a Pet-rock for you so that we can gain access to Lolosia for a holiday." Seraphine handed Valencia the jumping rock with eyes, "Hopes you'll like it."  
"Very well, but just to make sure these two don't get into trouble, can't they come too?" Valencia begged the two Adventurers, Seraphine glanced at Tetris and he nodded relucantly.

"Oh no!" groaned Tetris, gritting his canines together. "I hate company!" Devi stared at him.  
"You need a holiday..." stated Tek, "And we've only just arrived here to Battleon."  
"Yes, let's go," Seraphine yelled impatiently, "The seaside awaits!"

* * *

The sun was shining, the sea-salt was fresh in the air and tangy, the sea was whispering secrets... Perfect except for... 

"AHHHHRRRR! It burns! My skin burns!" wailed Tetris, "Why me?!"  
"Stop being such a baby," Seraphine was getting tired of his complaining. "It doesn't affect me."  
"That's a different matter!" Tetris snapped, "I have a rare medical condition of the skin!"  
The vampire mage was literally screaming as he tried to shade his body using a palm tree...

"Torturing your 'friend' Tetris is funny to me," acknowleged Devi, embracing the balmy heat and heatful sun, Tek was basking in the sun. "Look! An ancient seaship used awhile ago!"  
"What sea-ship?" Tek asked, "It's an ancient vessel..." Tetris stopped screaming, "Where?"  
"Over there," Seraphine pointed out, "It's Captain Rhubarb's ship."

"Thar she blows!" yelled a creaky voice as an ancient Captain appeared. "Welcome to Lolosia."  
"Yaaaar," Devi saluted the sailor, "Nice to meet you, old sea-legs!" The sailor blinked.  
"What in Lore are you?!" questioned the old sea-captain, "You're not human!"  
(Devi was still in his Mecha.)  
"Oops, sorry." Devi looked serious in the cockpit, "I hear the surf's really nice in Lolosia..."  
_"Enjoying the sun so far?"_ Twilly stated cheerfully, The mage growled at the Moglin.

"So, whatcha doing in a small port like this?" Tetris pointed out to the beatnik salior...  
"What's with the wooden leg...? Did something or someone happened to chomp on it?"  
The mage snickered, trying to put his mind off the blistering pain of the sun which scorched.

"Yes, how come you've arrived here? Any sea-voyages?" Seraphine interrupted with a grin...  
The sailor just shrugged, "Nah, it's just because I've spat out by thar nigh _Sea-Fiend_...!"  
Everyone stared, even the innkeeper, Rusehi (spelling?).  
"Sea-Fiend?" they all puzzled. "What?" Devi looked excited

"Alright, a sea monster...!" cheered Devi as he leapt, "Right, it's off to see it I go!"  
Tek followed him closely, clearly concerned about his wild and unpredictable behaviour.  
The mechanic now had a decent tan after lying in the sun for clearly too many hours...  
The oceanic-haired Ryusei shook with fear, "No, I wouldn't go there, travellers were eaten."  
Landing in the golden sand, Tetris grumbled about circumstances - "You'll be fish-bait...!"

"I can take about anything this sea-dragon can dish out," Seraphine boasted as she listened to a spiral seashell, "I'm very experienced for my age, I even slayed powerful Undead soldiers..."  
At this statement Twilly giggled childishly at the pink costume she was wearing, incapitated by laughter. The Salior shook his head in dismay at the bravado the Adventurer showed him...  
"You may be fantastic at slaying creatures, but trust me after seeing this Dragon...?"

"Ah, who cares," snorted Devi, "This beach's great and it's paradise in Lolosia, yeeha!"  
The pilot leapt into the water, embracing the chilling surf as it sprayed everywhere...  
Then the Mecha started rusting because he forgot he was still in the cockpit - plus it floated.  
"You can't do that," Tek warned desperately, "Mechas can't handle much sea-water...!"

"You could have told me that!" shrieked Devi as the mecha floundered around in the sea... Tek sighed as she tried to hitch out the heavy mecha, "You're going to have to pay..." Feathery Windzards squawked with glee as they attacked the fishy smelling robot.

Just then familar menacing Jaws music played: _der-do, deerr-do... _Water started to bubble.  
Everyone looked around in fear, except the Sea-Captain who was ignorant of the figure.

"What was that?!" Tetris questioned, "It sounds like a sonar!" Seraphine sweatdropped.  
"Of course it isn't a sonar, you bloodsucker," The female commented, wiser for the wear.  
"Wow, Twilly's scared already," laughed Devi... Just then, there was a huge thunder-roar...

"It's behind me isn't it?" The captain stated calmly, oblivious to the huge sea-dragon.  
"Yes, okay!" yelled everyone on the shore, terrified of the Sea-Fiend rising from the briny depths of whatever was down there in the sea...! Everyone hated to think where it came...  
"So, what does that mean?" the captain yelled blindly.

"Turn around already!" Tetris snapped at the one-legged captain, "Are you blind?"  
"Yes, I am blind in one eye." the Captain chuckled ironically. Tetris snarled.  
"Well, THANK YOU CAPTAIN OBLIVIOUS- Arrhgggh!" The vampire yelled in shock.

_Der-do, deerr-do, der-dun, DER-DUUUNNNN...!_ continued the annoying music.  
Just then, the Sea-Fiend fully arose from the depths of the sea and tossed Devi's Mecha into the air as well as clumsy Tetris who fell...! They spun rapidly before the Sea-Fiend caught them... with its mouth... "AAAERRRRR!!!" The two males yelled as the jaws closed.

_"Twilly doesn't like the looks of this!"_ Twilly whimpered pathetically. The Sea-Fiend chuckled as the rest of the group looked on in abject horror at the dragon beast's jaw...

"Tetris? Oh well," Seraphine shrugged nolachantly, "Never liked that sucker anyway, this isn't a total loss to me anyway, but at least Warlic will get his alllll potions baaack-..."

"Shut up!" yelled a muffled voice from inside the Sea-Fiend's mouth, "It's not funny...!"  
"He's still alive! YAY!" Tek cheered, "Devi's back...!" Everyone looked expectedly.  
_I am still hungry,_ commented Therefus the Sea-Fiend telepathically, _Time for appetizers_.

"Not without fighting me, you won't...!" Seraphine declared heroically, before getting whacked by the Sea-Fiend's tail. "OUCH! I'm telling my mother about you- OWW!!!"  
The Slayer clutched her head in pain, but then got up again, with full Fighter armor.  
"Any other plans?" Tek glanced at the remaining team, but saw they all shrunk back.  
"Fine, time for me to go into full Mecha warrior mode- Enpower Tek Jutsu!!!"

Tek glowed pink before she arrived in full female Mecha-like armor, complete with spanner.  
_"This is getting crazier by the minute,"_ groaned Twilly at the whole situation...

"Yeah I'm back, baby, and sugar rushed power as well!" Super-Hyperion-Tek cheered as she struck the dragon with her special spanner, which was full of sugar and dragon-orb powered goodness... But it refused to let go of its hostages... "I need help!" Hyperion-Tek called.  
_"Computerized Flash Blaster-!"_ Everyone blinked at the power-word... "What?"  
_"Romance Computerized Battler!"_ Super-powered Tek continued, "I think I lost power..."

The attack didn't do anything. So Hyperion-Tek had give up crimefighting for meantimes.

Seraphine launched a full-on attack, firing her blood-tipped ice arrows at a rapid rate into the dragon's tough hide... "It's not working," she cried as Thefarus laughed at her efforts...  
_  
"Dark Lighting! Elemental Rage_!" The dark-haired girl desperately shouted, stuttering out the words... Shadowly lightning blasted out of her fingertips along with explosions of a fire-water tornado filled with electricity zoomed at the dragon hypersonically...  
_You'll have to do better, you pathetic Slayer! (Hey, I made a rhyme!)  
_"Okayyy, ummm..." The Slayer was loss for words for now. "Shapeshifter spell!"

* * *

_Meanwhile inside the Sea-Fiend's mouth...  
_  
"We're gonna be digested!" Tetris wailed, "And I never knew true love!" It was hot and sticky inside the azure dragon's mouth as Tetris hung onto a sharp looking tooth in the gumline... There was a deep crimson cavern leading to who knows where, but it looked terrifying and sticky... The mage hated to think where THAT cavern led to, probably down somewhere with bile... and lots of bones and seaweed and other eaten stuff accumulating for years. 

"Shimei, Tetris!" Devi was attempting to look on the bright side, despite his fears...  
"Hey, help me! We're not gonna get digested," The pilot's voice was strained with panic...  
The Mecha pushed its iron arms upwards, against the roof of the Sea-Fiend's jaw, drool started to drip down the rusted arms. "Isn't this scary," he muttered, "How low can we go?"

"Isn't this just like a Neo Genesis Evangelion episode with both the Pilots, Asuka and Shinji and that fishy Angel with a big mouth?" Tetris commented, "We need someone to help!"  
"Yes, I say this is EXACTLY like a Neo Genesis episode! _Open! OPEN!"_ Devi yelled as the NGE theme music started playing in the background... "Shut up...!" he screamed at music.  
Suddenly the theme music stopped as Tetris glared at the Soluna Pilot, "I was enjoying it..."

"Give me your bases... I mean your pets," Devi corrected. Tetris sweatdropped, "Only one."  
At this, a small grey bunny rabbit bounced out of Tetris's backpack, "Neep?" it squeaked.  
"That'll help," Devi's voice was full of sarcasm, "What can it do?" Tetris grinned in delight.  
Immediately, a strong wind buffeted up as the bunny-rabbit... flew?! "YAY!"

At this, Thefarus's jaw opened a tiny fraction and Devi cheered. "The wind's doing well!"  
"I told you it'll work! Seraphine! Hand me your wonder, pointy Fearsome Dualight...!"  
_"WHAT?!"_ bellowed configured voice that was recognisablely femine, outside the mouth.  
"Fearsome Dualight, DUALIGHT!" Tetris persisted. Seraphine sighed and tossed her weapon.  
Tetris caught it with quick hands and propped the pointy sword between the jaws. "NOW!"

_AHH, aaah, Arrrr... CHOOO!!!!_ Thefarus sneezed and everything in the mouth blew out.  
Tetris toppled into the sands and Devi's mecha crashed outside the Giblet's inn... "WHOA!"  
_I'll, I'll be back to destroy Lolosia...! But first, I must return to Aquella and Water Lord._  
Thefarus sank into the briny depths, never to be seen again - for a long time at least...

"I hate dragons now," Devi groaned outside the swinging sign, "I never want to see another Dragon for as long as we live...! I think we all need to see a psychiatrist, but that was fun..."  
"Fun? Seraphine, you saved my life!" Tetris hissed, "How can I thank you?" He hugged her, but the Slayer ran away as fast as she possibly could, a shocked expression on her face...  
"Noooo! I wanted a holiday, but this is what I get?" Seraphine questioned...  
"Next stop, Graemor," A mysterious stranger announced, "Want a ride?" Everyone nodded.

* * *

_Paladin Juan Luxor Trimphant scowled as he trekked, watching from the sailing boats near Lolosia, hitching a ride as he adjusted his goggles. _

"So that's my new target, heh, that female Slayer looks scrawny from here." He was referring to one of them. "I can't believe Nightbane recruited me to do this mission..."  
"Still, I wonder if she's one of those foul four-legged subraces I heard about in legends?"  
Juan grinned as he polished his golden Axe...

"This will be an interesting encounter for all of us... I abide thee, Slayer Seraphine Newt. May your sudden 'accident' bode well for the other Paladins of the land of Lore... Foul beasts, all of them, most of tainted Lycan blood..."

"And those technological strangers, I must confirm their arrival with miss Safira." 


	11. A 'Grave' Situation

**

* * *

**

The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage 

Disclaimer: I don't own Dragon-Lord Alex, he belongs to his owner, Blade100_

* * *

Last time on 'Powerful Morphing Mecha-Rangers, episode 534'...!_

_"Hyperion Tek, you and your powerful cronies must stop the ebil Xorbu from taking over the Soluna city galaxy!" said the Dean formerly known as Warlic Blackmange (who in reality was Warlic the third). Tek was stunned by this sudden revelation, _

"I'm a Mecha ranger?!" The Mechanic shouted, "And so are the other stulos?"  
Vixen was adamant, "Gnarly! How did we gain these superhero powers?!"  
"Woohoo! We are the Rangers!" Misako cheered as the screen went blank. 

_"It all happened when you experimented with Tek Mech's Floorivator as miss Tek was experimented with consuming too much sugar, the resulting explosion and her insane sugar rush caused every stulos in the room (Tek included) to transform into powerful morphing Mecha Rangers!" Warlic explained to the dumbstruck trio, who were staring.  
"Then how come we can't remember the incident?!" Vixen commented  
"Because you all were unconscious and changed back!" Dean Warlic shouted. _

"Coolskis! Let's all transform again!" Devi shouted in joy, "Cerulean Hyperzardian!"  
Instantly he transformed into a lime green Dino-Mecha: "WHAT?! This is unfair!"  
"Crimson Rage!" Misako chanted and immediately she reappeared... in red, torn Spandex.  
"This is soooooo embarassing?!" she shouted, covering what was left of her humility.  
"Golden Novalithium!" Vixen was smug, determined. Suddenly there was a boom and she changed into a 20 foot tall giant, "I wonder what went wrong?!" Everyone glared at Tek.

"Don't ask me, ask Warlic!" Hyperion Tek was the only proper transformation sequence.  
"Whatever, anyone want to gatecrash a party?" suggested a giant Vixen, Misako glared.  
"Yeah- sure," cheered Devi as someon-_

* * *

_

Ooops, wrong story...! In our reality, Devi Whirl was dreaming the whole crazy episode as the other traveled to Graemor. "Tek and Devi, wake up! We're here!" shouted Seraphine as she pointed out a distant town. "Erthhhhh..." Devi yawned and stretched his limbs, "Wace up?"  
"We're in Gravy moor," the Mysterious stranger pointed out, "I mean the town of Graemor."

"It's so big, spacious, not to mention spooky," shivered Seraphine, "I don't like this."  
The slayer was rewearing her usual Slayers uniform, she didn't like her pink jammies much.  
Tek blinked in mute surprise, "We've just arrived, and what happened to the town!"  
"Muhahaha," laughed the Mysterious stranger, everyone stared. "Errr. I mean, what?"

The town was completely shatted, rubble was strewn everywhere, the white moon was glowing very weirdly and that was just for starters...! "This looks creepy," Twilly commented, "Eeeep!"  
"Time to get off!" shouted the Stranger, "Pay the fare, please... That will be 558 tokens."  
"I don't have 600 tokens," Seraphine realised at this, "You're just ripping us all off,"

"That was my intention, either that or... Another _DOOOOOOM_ weapon." Stranger demanded. Everyone's hair raised on end as the revealed skeleton reached towards them expectantly.  
"This guy's freaking me out, everyone get off the ride early!" Tetris yelled as he jumped off the black coach and everyone else followed shortly...

It was then he saw that the horse pulling their travelling carriage... was an Undead horse. "Waaarrrgghhh!" The mage screamed as he tumbled down a hill roughly...  
Before he was landing at the foot of a recent campsite pitched up.

"Hey, hello-! oooh, a lady." A lady called Lucentia was startled as he entered her tent...  
"No intruders allowed here!" Lucentia shouted, twacking the vampire on the head. It was then Tetris realised he left his vampire armour back in Battleon, so he looked close to normal...!  
"You young ladies are soooo predictable," he laughed in an attempt of black humour.

"Is that so, you ignorant stranger?" Lucentia yelped in distaste, holding some clear water.  
"This is sacred holy water blessed by the god of Lore, Lorithia," she told the idiotic mage,  
"One splash of this - You'll wish you've never been turned undead for as long as you live...!"

Tetris paled and then declined, "On second thoughts, I think I'll slink away quietly."  
He started to leave the tent, but the Potion specialist spoke up in a stern voice.  
"Not so fast," a firm hand gripped his shoulder, "I need someone to wash Potion bottles."

"I hate this lady," Undead mage wailed as he wiped Potion bottles in the washing-bucket...  
"That's a good Vampire-servant," Lucentia cooed softly, giggling at the situation...

"Only one thousand and eighty bottles to wash now... Plus I added some more Holy-water to these washing tubs as well!" she commented off handedly, then Tetris screamed in pain.  
"My hands!" Tetris held up his burnt hands as Lucentia snickered at the sight.

* * *

"What's that in the sky?!" Devi shrieked as he spotted several dark figures flying against the moonlit skies, Twilly glanced upwards in intrigue: _"They're dwagons, huge ones, oh noes...!"  
_  
"Here be dragons? Noooo!" Seraphine exclaimed, looking up at the skies, "I can't believe!"  
Just then one of the figures gave a piercing chirrup as if it was searching for something and the other one laughed curiously at the specks on the ground, instantly flames shot out of its eyes. 

The sown field in front of the gang burst into many flames as they watched in terror...  
"Duck! Everyone, duck!" shouted Tek as she transformed once more into Hyperion-Tek.  
"Is that all the logic you have to say?" said Devi sarcastically, "Really we're under attack here!"

"Wow, a first for Devi... sarcasm," Seraphine had to smile at that, maybe her unique attitude was 'rubbing off' on the Soluna pilot. Twilly was hiding under a patch of leaves, shivering.

They came nearer now, it was that strange half-dragon cat and another fire-dragon, Arikioth.  
"It's that lady!" spoke Keliare clearly in the language of dragons. The rogue-cat was riding on the back of Arikioth and issuing commands to it, another flame-dragon joined their party.

"I hope they won't find Twilly here!" The brown Moglin yelped as his leaves caught fire.  
_RAAAWWWRRR!!!_ screamed the fire dragons as they circled the area, they were closing in...  
"I think now would be a good time to scream and flee," whispered Devi as he sweatdropped.  
"This is the reason I now have a phobia of Dragons...!" he glanced at the ground in panic

"AAAHHH!!!!" Both the Soluna-city pilot and Tek ran from the area as dragons chased them... Unfortunately, both of them were heading for the 'Undead Cemetery', but they didn't know-!  
A sign was at the enterance in ruins. The remaining words on it were crossed outs...

* * *

"Wait, come back here!" Seraphine yelled, long resounding screams replied her call.  
"Undead! Loads of undead!" Devi, Twilly and Hyperion-Tek came rushing out a few seconds later, with an undead war-party close on their trail... "The future blooowwsss! AAHHH!" 

"Serves them right for not reading the sign - Oh wait, I can't read it!" Seraphine commented as she chased after the trio. "I'm telling you guys for the last time, slow down!" _TRIP-! _

"Oh no, I'm stuck in a trap!" The female slayer was now hanging upside down in a makeshift trap which was crudely made by an ametuer (kinda oblivious if you ask a certain Paladin)...  
"Hello young Slayer-!" greeted Paladin Juan, happy to see his outrageous plan had finally worked, jumping up and down in glee. "Artix sent me a task of biblicial proportions..." 

"What's a 'Bible'?" Seraphine asked sharply, she's clearly not amused...  
"I'm the Paladin Juan-! I'm supposed to be targetting you anyways," he giggled darkly.  
"Oh great and your IQ level must be really low," she insulted back at the male Paladin.

The girl with flowing 'green' hair attempted to untie her legs... And landed in a pile of sloppy steaming and fresh dragon 'doo-doo'... "Ugghhh... Juan-!" she raged at the smirking teenager, who just stood there with a huge mischievious grin plasted on his goggled face...

"Muhahahaa..." Juan chuckled, "Here's a nice sink to wash up your clothes and face... Lycan."  
"What did you call me?" Seraphine threatened at the youthful and energetic Paladin...  
"I'm dangerous when angered-! Who told you this information?"  
"No one in particular, I'm just a naive Paladin," Juan looked so innocent for a moment...

Before raising a huge hammer to his side, "Thunder Rawk hammer-! I love trickery...!"  
Juan laughed, knocking Seraphine down before she had a chance to even protest...

* * *

"So what do we do now?!" protested Devi as he continued screaming for a prolonged amount of time... It was a strange sight seeing the time-travellers fleeing for their very lives...  
The demonic War-party was getting nearer now as they rattled their weapons in excitement... Hyperion-Tek sweatdropped, "How 'bout we just keep on running until Seraphine slays them?" Tek looked around, but the Slayer wasn't there - instead a huge skeleton was jeering at the sight of the Soluna lady. 

"Now would be a good time to scarper," suggested the leader of the war-party, patting his skinny wolfhound, "Want a cup of Grove tea...?" Tek stared, Devi stared as well...  
"Time to start slaying some Undead," Devi grinned, "Sorry, I can't take your request!"

Heaving a huge weapon, the Mecha knocked the skull away from the rest of the skeleton and the bones scattered everywhere... "Yeah! My first battle!" But his joy was short-lived.

Amazingly, the bones reconstructed themselves. "That wasn't very nice-!" the leader snapped.  
"Errr... I'm sorry!" Devi admolished over the PDA system, but the leader was furious.  
"CHARGE-!" The undead Leader yelled over the soldier's din as the Mecha stood there like a idiotic machine. "Now what do we do?!" repeated Hyperion-Tek angrily at the Pilot...

_"Devi, you just made things worse!"_ Twilly replied to Devi...  
"Quick, to the crypt in the Cemetary!" Devi panted, "That's the only way!"  
"Not that-!" Tek groaned, "I don't like this plan at all!" Twilly nodded mutely...  
_"We have no choice!"_ Twilly replied, Devi's expression was like daggers.  
"Fine, any plan is a risky plan, but I have no idea!" The red mecha bellowed at the two.

* * *

"Get me out of this haunted house!" Seraphine wailed at Juan as the Paladin locked the door behind him, smirking all the way... Juan looked satisfied with his task and made faces outside one of the windows, the Slayer angrily made the windows rattle... 

"Fine, I'll just try to defeat the first beast or ghostly fiends which I find!" she scowled, asking her dark wolf to come out. "That can't be too hard, I'm not scared of anything..."

_RAARRRR! _screeched a jumbled Undead monster with skeletonal features and crocodile teeth. The Slayer paused, her eyes widening... "On second thoughts... I'll use my Razorscale."  
The battle began and the Undead bones was rentless in its attacks, the female Slayer blocked the attacks and used a chair against it (what? She has to use something as a weapon!)

Much, much later... "What?! Another monster?! This is one of my worst nightmares!" Seraphine realised after the third time she got defeated by a 'wave' of unbeatable monsters...

"And I'm out of my special potions!" She was at the point of exhaustion, her pet Banewaer was panting erratically and it growled in pain at the darkness attacks. _HESSSS..._ A moglin ghost grasped the air and shot a dark wave of energy, this time the Lycan was just too tired to resist the attack... She dropped like a rock.

_"Back again so soon?"_ the Avatar of Death grinned at the Slayer, rattling his scythe.  
"Hehee, I have a good mind to do some reaping," The hooded skeleton considered.  
"Ummm... Haven't you got anything else to do while in your domain? Nice darkness." Adventurer Seraphine said wittily, retaining her sense of razor-sharp humour...

"Well, I've been busy reaping souls of monsters all day, salaries are due," considered the Reaper in glee, "But as you've been so good destroying all those beasts, you'll go free."  
"Oh goody," the Slayer said in irony, "Maybe you should consider taking a hike."  
"Name one reason why I shouldn't evaporise your health right now." Reaper argued.  
"I bet you won't be needing this then." Seraphine smirked, snatching up the hourglass.  
"What? No! Come back here you dimwitted Slayer!" Too late now, the Slayer vanished.

"Now that's what I call, cheating Death!" The female slayer got resurrected again...  
"Wait, this is the same room! Am I stuck in a time LOOP?" Another ghost wailed in fear...  
"Maybe if I exited through this hallway!" she panted, taking a shortcut through the house.

* * *

"You got any _other_ smart ideas, Devi Whirl?" glared Tek as the two Soluna people came across a haunted graveyard full of 'dirty' holes dug up eons ago... "I still don't like those crypts!" the frightened female mechanic protested as poor Twilly shivered in fright... 

"This was the only idea I could dig up!" shouted the red Mecha as he started walking through graves, "See, I'm okay!" _CRASH!_ "Make that un-okay!" _Crrrreak._ "AARHHH!!!" he shouted.  
"Devi, that's just so happens to be a undead creaking plant." pointed out Tek in amusement...  
"No, not that!" shook Devi, "It's the Undead war-party!" Tek and Twilly ran for their lives.

"Heheh. That had fooled them! Pass me the mechanical shield, you good person."  
Devi chuckled, an unseen firm hand handed his Mecha the unnamed weapon... "Shimei, this isn't what I asked for-" A smile froze as he realised the hand... was rotting. "Zombies!"

Immediately, all the zombies rose from their fresh graves, groaning for shopping bags...!  
The Mecha grabbed the nearest building it could find and sent the wall of crypts tumbling.  
"This is so horrific, I'm going to be killed 5,000 years after I was born!" Devi bellowed.  
Then he saw Hyperion Tek battling the zombies and Twilly in the crypt. "Twilly! Tek!"

"Hyperbeam!" surprisingly, Tek did quite well against the shopping zombies.  
"Raugh, shawping baaugs...?" growled one of the zombies before being blasted.  
"This would make quite a good movie back in Soluna cinimea!" commented Devi.  
"You think?" squeaked Twilly as the two red dragons passed overhead... "Dwagons!"

One of the dragons opened its mouth at Keliare's commands and shot a firebeam at the army of shopping undead and they fled the scene. "RAARRR!" bellowed Keliare as a Ninjacat-dragon.  
"Keliare doesn't approve of undead creatures, all shall run." The hybrid rogue spread her wings over Devi's mecha, plunging her blades into the machanical robot and grabbing Hyperion Tek with clawed feets... "Come with me." she insisted, "I know you won't resist."  
"Where are you taking us?!" demanded Devi and Tek furiously.

* * *

"Oh Loritiha! I despise this house," proclaimed Seraphine to the hungry monsters, "I hope this isn't an eternal (not to mention ironic) punishment from above!" The monsters nodded.  
"Well then, no use fighting all of you guys, I shall accept my fate. Do what you like with me." the Slayer dared the haunted house monsters, who all grinned evilly. They slavered. 

_CRASH!_ Suddenly, a large hole crashed through the house's walls and a creature pinned the monsters to their respective walls, the Slayer's eyes widened. "Devi and Tek! Of all people!"  
"Let's get you outta this house!" Devi's Mecha tore another hole before the trio exitted.  
_  
"Yes! Beat that, Paladin Juan!"_ Seraphine in her Lycan form cheered as Banewaer grinned.  
"Seraphine?! How can that Slayer escape so easily!" wondered Paladin Juan, apparently in a deep rage as he watched the dragon-creature make its way across the starry night...

"I only did that because I owed everyone something," admitted Keliare shyily. "Take this..."  
"A Dragon-Lord's amulet, but why?" questioned Twilly. Keliare mewed once in reply.  
"It belonged to one of the greatest Dragon-Lords of all time, Alex the Dragon-lord." replied the transformed rogue... "Your team might need it on a future quest or something."  
"Geez, thanks." complimented Tek in wonder as she grasped, "But why are you helping?"

"Safira the queen thinks she can get the better of handling Dragons, but I prove otherwise." Keliare spoke up nobily, "She can enslave me, but not Cyrus's ancient bloodline..." It smirked.  
"I want your team to help our dragons rise to the status they once had back in Falconreach,"  
"If that 'sucker was here, he would be furious." Seraphine smiled at the thought of Tetris.

* * *

"736, 730..." counted Tetris wearily as he nursed his burnt hands in agony. Lucentia had a smug expression on her face as she patted the exhausted vampire's head. "Good servant."  
"I wish I was staked," The mage cried out, "anything is better than this holy water-torture!"  
"Nice mage, you deserve your reward!" Lucentia smiled once more as she kissed him. 

"RAAAWWWR!" screamed Keliare as she entered the tent with everyone else.  
"A dragon!" Lucentia scowled, knocking away Tetris. "In my potions tent, of all locations!"  
"Everyone!" Tetris smiled, "Take me away from this cruel gryphon-lady! Please!"  
The undead mage begged Keliare and everyone was struck by the irony of the situation.  
"Go! Go away from my tent" shouted Lucentia, "I don't like strangers snooping around!"  
"We're going," groaned Devi as the lady twacked him on the head with a fan.

Once out of Graemor, everyone (excluding Keliare) ran for the hills of Battleon.

* * *

"Helllooo?!" Misako and Vixen both called as the Oeykens entered the town, "Anyone here?"  
"Woohooo!" Devi called from the hills, "My two Oeyken friends! Don't worry about here."  
Everyone in town facefaulted at each other at the new encounter, "Who are these travellers?!"  
"We're out of our holiday," spoke Seraphine, "And who are these girls?" Vixen glared.  
"A _Xanatolv,_ I see." Vixen growled in distaste, "A pure _Xanatolv..."_ Seraphine blinked. 


	12. AAAAHHHH! Minotaurs!

**Movie Preview: Space Moglins: Episode XVI**

_Twilly Trekwalker grasped his energy weapon as his opponent, Dart Twang sneered at the small looking creature.  
"Had enough yet?" The white masked Dart Twang as he approached his eternal rival, "I have a secret I've been wanting to share."  
"It isn't that 'I am your father' pun is it?" demanded Twilly as he used his Force to transform its mace into a healing staff.  
"No, worse than what that Oban Twig had told you..." Dart Twang laughed obsinately, he leant in close to wispher his secret:  
"I AM TWIG'S GREAT GRANDFATHER!" boomed Dart Twang, removing his mask. Immediately Twilly Trekwalker gasped...  
"NOOOOOOEEEEESSS!" The brown Moglin squeaked in horror as Dart Twang approached him and did the Force again.  
(Disclaimer: No sane Moglins were hurt in this production, not even the ebil ones. And this had nothing to do with Star Wars)_

It was always the same dreams that plagued her since the strange transformation.  
First Keliare would be running as her normal human-self, whipping out her twin blades as she charged at the _'prey'_, yet another Torch-feet which wobbled on its base… The female rogue felt exuberant – It was a fantastic feeling which she never wanted to end, the hands which grasped the blades...

The silent wind rushing through hair, the dizzying sensation of soaring through the air… _Wait a second, gliding?_  
Keliare turned around to find she was pursued by a gothic presence through the atmosphere as she spread her transparent dragon-wings which sliced the air. _NO!_ Elemental creature raged as it ravaged the broken wings, screeching with loudness...  
Then the rogue was spinning through the skies as she realised she was about to plunge…  
But the impact never came, instead the dreams always concluded at that precise moment.

The Ninja-cat awoke with a jolt; she could still feel the cold stone floor below her. Voices were shouting outside the dungeon. "Those technological-advanced strangers had arrived." Safira stated as she scowled, revealing her cutting canines.  
"This single event ruins every plan I have consulted over the ancient millennium. Plus with those Slayers around creating nuisance, our regal numbers are decreasing faster than we could gnaw! Paladin Juan,"  
The Queen purred is if in seething rage, her eyes aglow with a terrifying vacant expression.  
"Your helot ninja-cat has revolted against your grandness," responded Juan calmly, pointing towards her.  
"I had witnessed her assisting one of those Slayers in that gothic town of yore."  
That was a huge mistake, Juan realised. It was if a bat from the depths of nowhere had being released...

Instantly, Safira exploded with rage, as she glared at her ill-gotten slave with uttermost hatred.  
"So, you thought you would betray your Queen," The young looking Queen hissed, "Keliare, look at me."  
Mewing with fear, Keliare glanced quickly at the Queen, the face was transformed into a snarl. It was for her ears only.  
"You shall understand that until my contract with the reaper has broken, you belong to me..."  
"And no person, dragon, monster or beast has ever survived getting out of my castle _alive."  
_They became undead, Keliare realised with a sickening realisation, they never came out.  
Sibilantly, Safira seemed demonic at that moment, Keliare tried not to cry out in horror...

"I have plans for you, if you betray me a second time, throw you in the moat. or better still... How about The PIT."  
"My queen, it is not nessarcy to use such threats." Grim-Weld interrupted, "For if we use tatics to our advantage."  
The silence was broken and Juan looked uneasy upon the beast that was Keliare. _That twisted beast.  
_Safiria has a smile on her face. "What about Tetris," she spoke in a clear voice, "He is travelling with the Slayer."  
"Correct, I am checking in on their progress." Juan conceded, "And those time-travellers are with them."  
"I knew I could count on you Juan... Keliare, do you think we can finish off the Lycan subrace?"  
Keliare felt like she would rather not do the task at hand.  
"Finish her, dragon. Including the time-travellers." The Queen concluded, "Change of plans."  
"I knew I couldn't count on that pathetic minion, Tetris Arktos."  
"Why, I could say... Maybe he's starting to fall for that Lycan Slayer...!" Safiria gloated.  
"In love, miss?" Juan added with a snicker as the other Vampires laughed with glee.  
"What did you say?!" Safira roared, "No minion of mine gets romantically attached to a Slayer!"

* * *

"What is this bizarre item?" commented Seraphine as she pawing through Vixen's private stuff and finding a gadget which was very shiny, had a screen and appeared very high-tech. The Slayer was confused at the sleek device, not used to the dazzling buttons on the item.

"That's a holomuniator, item from our time period. Pretty cool, huh? It pre-records holographic images of people, acts as communicating device and files voices." Vixen instructed sneakily, hiding a hidden smile.  
"In fact, before this time-trip, I recorded three singing lessons!"  
"Awesome, eheh." Tetris grinned with a glint in his eyes, "Can we _see?"  
_"Sure, the tutor I had back on Terra said I had a great voice for my age." The foxy pilot nodded with a smile.  
"Now, let me press this button." Instantly the screen opened up and shot a colourful holographic image- but what they all expected _wasn't_ random gibberish.

"_Exrosata ehtn deux, Exrosata ehtn deux," Devi screeched horribly with a karaoke microphone, dressed in a silly Martin outfit – Totally outdated. "Alabama jeix nuxro!" He was standing in front of some girls and he was totally into it, jiving like the whirlwind._

"That's your song?" Seraphine gaped sarcastically, "No wonder, it was ruined."  
"Devi, did you overwrite the special item I brought on spaceship? What did you sing."  
_"I'm too Sexy for my Shirt – Martin version._" Devi snorted as his hologram continued belting out random lyrics...  
"You don't like it? I thought it was already blank." He spoke to Seraphine; she shook her head and chuckled quietly at him. Tetris was rolling around on the Inn floor, laughing like a maniac after watching the hologram for a couple more minutes.  
"Bwahaa!" cheered the dim mage, wiping away tears of laughter as the hologram continued to holler out.  
"That was by far the silliest fiasco I ever saw!"

Vixen looked furious, her eyebrow twitched with anger, "Is that all you recorded, Devi?"  
As if on cue, the hologram was replaced by a low, alto voice distinctly humming a familar tune in Soluna language with showering heard in the background: _"Oops I did it again; I missed a spot here... (Pause) Aaaahh…! Get out of here NOW! Oh no, you can see my two antenne, can't you?!"_ The voice screamed, high-pitched.

"I think I left it in the showers, accidentally recorded this audio." Devi explained, sweat-dropping.  
"DEVI!" screeched Misako from the hallway, "That was MY singing voice you recorded. How could you?" she laughed.  
"Wow, Misako doesn't seem angry with him," commented Tetris to Seraphine with a secret grin.  
"It's a girl thing," Seraphine scowled, not impressed with Vixen's item by now, instead she seemed far off in her thoughts.  
"But what about my song, you ding-dong." Vixen argued with Devi, "Where's the rest of my recording??"  
"I taped halfway through," admitted Devi with a sneaky grin, "Here's the untaped bit." Vixen glared.  
_"-Oklahama, let the rain dance or shine, through driven rains or day sunshine, the farmwork is done all day!"  
"Well done, Brassimio! Now let's try that again, with a bit more pathos!" The tutor clapped. Another round of singing.  
"The rain in Spain lies mainly, all the same." Vixen continued singing, voice wavering.  
"WHAT? That's not the right words! You need more work on your lines! Your lines!"_

Then the tape finished, Vixen sighed. "What did you think?" Everyone didn't comment, but were sweatdropping.  
"I would rather be battling monsters than listen to that again," pointed out Seraphine, looking weirdly at the item.  
"Your voice is brilliant, but you didn't sing the right words," giggled Tek, "That is the funniest thing ever..."  
Misako came in, but she banged her head on the iron lantern, "Must this be in the way?" she was very tired...  
Bags were under her eyes and everyone stared. "Not enough sleep," commented Tetris, leaping up and grinning.  
"It was all because of you...!" Misako snapped at the mage irritably.  
"I couldn't sleep because of this Alvenos in the next room! I ended up sleeping in the attic, ALL NIGHT LONG...!"  
"I can't help it if I crave liquid, mmmmm!" snarled Tetris playfully. "Did you like your stay with Bishop Finch?"  
"Go to kelf, you strange Tetris." Misako muttered as Finch hung from the ceiling. "Besides, what's on today."

* * *

"It's the running of the BULLS!" Seraphine shouted with delight as a new proccession came to Battleon.  
Everyone yelled with delight at the sight, including the Soluna pilots as they stared at the red and gold festivities.  
"You mean Minotaurs." pointed out Tetris. "Ole, hola, ole!" the mage greeted one of the new people in garbs...  
"Seniorita, bourgious!" The minotaur-fighter Rico announced with a stunning grin, which made all the girls faint.  
"Translation?" wondered Tetris as he oggled a glass of red wine being drunk by an unhappy Necromancer.  
"He's speaking LORE version of Spainard," Vixen wondered before speaking again with the blue haired Rico.

"¿Hola Rico, qué festividades hay encendido hoy? Soy Vixen Foxtrot, y éstos son todos mis amigos..."  
"¿Espero que usted pueda introducirnos al arte de la tauromaquia el Minotaurs? ¿Es eso duque con usted?"  
"¿Cuál es su nombre?" Vixen finished off her speech, to the amazement of Misako who looked stunned.

"WHAT are they saying?" Seraphine felt like screaming because she couldn't understand a word of Spanish language.  
"She's just introducing us to him and asking about bullfighting the Minotaurs, the festival and a Duke," Tetris explained.  
"When did you last understood Spanish!" Vixen broke out of her Spanish words to ask Tetris.  
"Since last time _the great one_ granted me the ability to understand all spoken languages." Tetris replied mysteriously  
"Okay, you lost me there, you blood-sucking Mage." The Slayer face-faulted as Rico replyed in LORE langauage.  
"Amigos, I shall teach you the art of bullfighting Minotaurs! And that duke's name is the famous _Duke Whirlwind!"_

At this introduction, a tall person wearing a chain of glinting jewels, smug smile underneath his white Zorro-like mask.  
_"WACE_! A duke called Whirlwind! How romantic!" Misako smiled as if she was fantitising what was underneath the mask.  
"Avaust! This mask I wear is my mask that hides my hidden sorrow, but none shall glance at what lies here..."  
At this point, every girl in Battleon broke into song, except for some exceptional people (including Devi and Tetris).  
_"Sweep the floors and clear the room! Duke Whirlwind makes all the girls swoon, with his charm and his mysteries!__"  
_"This is NOT a musical!" Tetris screamed out loud, "This is real-life!" They all ignored him as Rico gave a dazzling grin.

"No wonder they like him," commented Devi sulkily, "Look at his outrageous mask! And his jewels! And his clothes!"  
"We get the point!" yelled Seraphine, cooing over the Duke of Whirlwind. "You're so cool!"  
The Slayer had a bedazzled look to her face, as if in rapture. It was quite unlike her personality.  
At this her furry ears twitched and the Duke yelled in absolute horror, tossing her away with a wave.  
"A female Lycan! Admiring me! Get away, you young scondrel of a Whelp!"

Duke transformed into a literal Whirlwind and blew the poor Lycan away before she could protest back.  
"He's so awesome! He's so awesome!" The Rest of the girls chanted, already under the Duke's spell.  
"Silence!" Rico cheered. "I shall now select two people to herald the GREAT minotaur of Dwarf Mountains to assist the Duke."  
"Ooh, let me try!" Tetris boasted, jumping up. "I shall drain away that Minotaur's lifeforce!" Suddenly mage hit on a idea.  
"I'm already not liking him." Devi groaned at the insane fiasco as the Duke was pompous and yelled Avaust!

"Listen Devi, I think I have a plan. You see the Duke?"  
Tetris had a cunning look towards the Duke, making sure none of the girls overheard his current plan...  
"yeah, what about that know-it all show off?" Devi snapped in distaste, Tetris bared his teeth.  
"The Duke's enchanted all of the girls in Battleon with his spell or his charming attitude towards the others. He's a menance. We should get rid of the competition, you know... Get him drunk with imported Masala wine before the Minotaur fight."  
"Ohhhh... Why didn't you say so Tetris?" Devi winked with glee, "Gotcha there, my new partner!"  
"Gotta catch him unaware!" Devi cheered deviously, with a sinister grin at the Duke, "You have a free meal,"  
"Gladly," Tetris smirked ebilly, feeling his insicors lengthen. Ironically, Devi didn't know of his plan...

"The new assistants are: Devi Whirl and Seraphine Newt!" Rico announced. "Now bring in the Minotaur."  
"Wait a minute! Shouldn't the Duke rest and have a drink from the tavern first!" Tetris yelled, creating a commotion.  
"Sure, why not I've only just arrived, avaust, my dear girls!" the Duke waved as he went into the tavern...  
('Leave everything up to me,' Tetris winked at Devi as he gave a thumbs up.)

About ten minutes later...  
"What is taking him so long!" Valencia complained to Tek, "I want to see him NOW!" Some of other females groaned.  
"Dunno, but the new Duke's such a dreamboat," smiled Tek dreamily as the other Oeyken agreed with a nod.  
"I don't know either," Robina said passionately, "But he's mine!" Finally, the Duke staggered out.  
"Alright, let's do this minotaur fighting thing." The Slayer spoke up somewhat impatiently, checking her blood-red uniform.  
Seraphine was already dressed in the finest Bullfighting outfit that put the other costume that Devi wore to shame...  
"AW...! Seraphine, your outfit is much more snazzier than mine!" yelled Devi out loud.

"Well, at least your performance in that weird screen was sub-par," commented Seraphine rather cheekily as the Lycan inspected her tucked-in tail. "Now let's see how we fare with the real thing, right Devi...?"  
However, Devi was already running across the square towards Rico, "I need a new bullfighting costume!"  
"Sorry amigos Devi, I am the one who chooses the outfit." Rico laughed. Devi's ego looked deflated as he stared at it.  
The brown-furred Minotaur-hybrid bellowed and pawed the ground with its two hooves.

"YUUUUUUUUUUUU!!" the sound carried.  
"Ole! Ole!" Seraphine chanted as she posed with her cape fluttering in the non-existant breeze,  
"Hasta no visita, Minotaur!" she mocked the bull-man as it attempted to butt her in the ribs, but Seraphine was too quick for the clumsy ox-like humaniod, mainly because of the special powers the crimson bull-fighting uniform had given her...

"Here, you big bully!" Devi said as he kicked the Minotaur right where the bull's tail bone was...  
The minotaur was furious: _How dare this two-legs hit it in the hip! _Rearing up, the minotaur rammed him backwards so hard...  
The poor Martin landed on the ground, on top of the Duke, who was still recovering from whatever was in that liquid.  
"Hey! Get ovvv me!" the Duke yelled in a thick accent, shoving the confused Pilot away, "Haster no arksro!"

The poor Duke wavered, his words slurring before falling on the ground, completely drunk... Everyone gasped in shock.  
"And I don't even wanna know what that meant," Tek stated as everyone sweatdropped. "What? I had to say something!"  
"I'll be back in a minute," Tek retired to a nearby building. A minute later, our favourite superheroine Hyperion Tek appeared...  
"Ok, events were totally predictable," Hyperion-Tek said, "But no matter! Time to save the day! YEEHA...!"

"Take this and that and this and that!" Seraphine continued as she teased the bull and it snoorted as she whirled around. "Wow, I should make this a career!" The Slayer realised, "Too bad it's only a one day thing! Love this eveeeennttt!" she yelled.  
"UUUUUUU!" The male minotaur wasn't impressed as he knocked Seraphine down with a toss of his head...  
"PARRY!" Seraphine leapt up again with a fencing sword in her hands, "Ha! This is awesome! Grrrrawr...!" A snarl ensured.  
Minotaur didn't give up however. It locked its eyes on the fallen Duke. Hot steam poured out of its nostrils as it charged.  
"AAAHHH! Habre non Sanchos!" The duke screamed and ran around in little circles as the Minotaur chased him...  
"WHAT'S THAT Supposed to mean!" Rico bellowed over the stampeding of the bull-man. "I dunno!" Seraphine yelled back.

Suddenly... "Is that a bird?" screamed Tetris, "Is it a dumb vampire bat?" A pink haired lady wearing red armour appeared.  
"No," giggled the lady, "It's Hyperion-Tek! Here to save the day!" Tetris slapped his head in annoyance as all the girls cheered.  
"Hyperion-Tek...!" Devi mused as he groaned at thoughts of all of the plans to get rid of the ANNOYING Duke (though it was the dumb Tetris's idea in the first place), "Of all places, why now...?! I want to enjoy my time in the spotlight!"  
"Because I have to save the day, using my ultra special weapon... _Bubblegum!"_ Everyone facefaulted and fell anime-style.  
"NOT BUBBLEGUM!" Everyone in Battleon village groaned, "Anything but the bubblegum!" Hyperion-Tek sweatdropped...

"FFFFUUUUUU!"  
A huge and gigantic pink bubble inflated from Hyperion-Tek's mouth and it was elastic. It then floated away from the superheroine and stuck to the Minotaur's shaggy fur and the fierce animal looked confused...  
"It's working," cheered Robina as she shot an arrow into the bubble and it exploded sticky stuff all over the poor beast.  
The Minotaur ran around in short bursts, confused at which direction it was going in, because it couldn't see with the stuff.  
"Shall we do the last honours?" offered Misako cheerfully as she waved another red cape, Vixen shrugged in delight.  
"I don't see why not." Vixen sighed. "ALL FOR ONE and... Your line...?" She looked towards her friend confusedly...  
Misako sweatdropped, "Never mind." the Oeyken declined. "Just coax the Minotaur back into the enclosure."  
"I can do that...!" Hyperion-Tek offered, but then Rico stared at those words.  
"Nope, strictly Minotaur fighter's business." Rico stated, dazzling smile again.  
THUMP! The two Oeykens fainted because of the beautiful whiteness of Rico's teeth.  
"I'LL DO IT." Devi fumed somewhat guiltily. "I feel responsible for all this mess already! Here Minotaur," he spoke as to a kitty.

The minotaur wasn't so happy about the Two-legs so it chased the poor Soluna pilot across the sqaure, RAM...! And then the beast ran into the enclosure and shut the gate behind it, snorting smartly. Seraphine had to laugh at the unexpected genius...  
"That was funny," smiled Artix as he chuckled at the sight of the Minotaur's smartness. It was then that the Duke's mask fell off on its own accord... and everyone gasped in surprise, including the poor Devi himself.

"DEVI! THE DUKE LOOKS LIKE YOU...?!" yelled a stunned Seraphine. She was right in a way. Apart from his human appearance, there were some similarities between the Duke and Devi, including the face and the eyes. The rest was totally clear as black and white. The Duke called Whirlwind was dressed so differently from Devi himself, that oblivious even to dumb Tetris that the two people were not same. The truth took a few minutes to sink in, then everyone looked weirdly upon Devi, confused.  
"AARRRRHHH...! Shimeeeeeeiii." Devi screamed in annoyance, "So all the Oeykens here liked..." He gagged in utter shock.

"What?" responded Duke the Whirlwind, recovering from the incident of meeting Devi the pilot...  
"Great, great, grandfather? But alas, it cannot be! You shouldn't have been here in this time-period...!"  
The Necromantress from earlier before, ran onto the scene: "What in LORE is going on here? Answer me,"  
"Does anyone else find this weird?!" yelled Misako as she realised what had happened, "Oh no."...  
The lady Necromantress with blazing eyes stood in front of the Oeyken, she was also in shock and denial...  
"Scald my eyes, can it be...? Great, great grandmother! It's Trinenna!" Trinenna stated rather darkly.  
("Oh no, Lorithia!!" Misako responded.)


	13. Dreams and Schemes

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

Note: Not quite finished yet, but wait few weeks longer before reviewing...! :)

"Go on, admit it!" Tetris dared Trinenna with a smug smile as the two chatted in room 42 of Yulgar's Inn...  
The mage had a hungry look about him - whereas poor necromantress looked as though she would rather JUMP off the nearest bridge...  
"I would rather leap into Anzu Lake than confess that," the necromantress rolled her eyes in boredom.  
Somehow the conversation was less electrifying than expected and it fizzled out quickly...  
Trinenna rather sulky about the whole incident as she avoided his loud and rather low-brow chatter...  
"And did I mention I like those sporks? They're pointy and round..."  
"Yeah, I know," Trinenna glared at the mage, looking him over with a quizzical expression. "You told me three times already."  
_Trinenna! Trinenna! I like a girl named Trinenna, and what a marvellous night it would be!_ thought Tetris in delight...

Tetris leant closer to her, "Hey, I've heard that you're the descendant of Misako. Right?!" The mage was excited, feeling went back into his fingertips and he leant even closer to the girl. "So you and meself have a lot in common...!" _It won't be long now!_  
"With all the gloom and doom more like," scowled the lady, dark sooty lashes blinking, charms and trinklets... err, tinkled.  
"For starters, you like to raise the dead back to life - and I'm like am dead technically," Tetris began in happiness. She scoffed.  
"If you're dead, shouldn't you be in a graveyard by now?!" Trinenna smiled with humour. He blushed with emotion.

"Another thing, we think alike - in most matters."  
she now looked horrified at being on the same level as the mage.  
"Rather be tied to the top of the Guardian tower with Zorbak than think same as you." she put it bluntly.  
"Even Zorbak admits your beauty cannot compare," Tetris spouted very random poetry, "To a zombie's... afro."  
(WTF? Trinenna blinked at the words. He was a very strange teen indeed.)  
"I'm not impressed," she confessed dully.  
The mage scowled, he was running out of options, dammit! Either he starves tonight or he waits for another lady.

"Come on, one tiny pash?" pleaded Tetris, weedling like a little Undead puppy, "No one else is here, not even that ancestor."  
"Wellll..." considered the lady Trinenna, blushing very red. "If you do me ONE single favour for me tonight. Don't tell _her."  
_"You mean, that ancestor of yours?! Yeah, yeah." he said nodding his head quickly... "Misako will here nothing from this ol' mage! I was right, you're as dirty minded as me!" Tetris almost wept with joy at the situation - a lovely lady wanting a kiss!  
"Your hands are so cold - like frozen ice." admitted Trinenna, "That's very odd. Have you wrapped up warm recently?!"  
By now, his incisors were just centimetres away from her neck, he was soooo close. Trinenna looked alarmed.

_"HOWLLLLL!!"_ Suddenly Seraphine bounded from the back-door of room 42, in full Collie-lycan form. "TETRIS!"  
_"Stay away from him, lady Trinenna! He's a blood-sucking, dirty-minded vampire who only uses pretty ladies!"_ WHAM! Trinenna slapped Tetris so hard with her silver trinklets that it was a whip-crack. "So you're that vampire from Moonridge!"  
"Thanks a lot, Seraphine," Tetris scowled, baring his teeth, "Now I lost a free meal, and so pretty too!" Seraphine snickered.  
_"I shall keep you from preying on those innocent ladies, can't have a repeat of what happened! It's a half-moon tonight."_  
"I bet you had a lot of fun with your lycan buddies," Trinenna smiled, not surprised at the fact she was talking to a beast.  
_"Yes, but there's many very strange sight: Have you seen any of Rostrum lycans? There's a lycan-exterminating vampress from around Doomwood around the west of Battleon!"  
_  
"Hmph, I'll look into it, but don't go all hairy on me tonight!" Trinenna grinned. "You better change ba-"  
"Already changed," Seraphine announced, before realising... "I'm naked...?! _NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"  
_"Oh Lorithia, shut up!" Trinenna giggled, "All the more gloom, the better it is to me." Tetris oggled Seraphine.  
"I never ever realised you have such nennen-" Tetris's eyes grew wide at the Slayer's figure.

"Name one of the reasons -why- I shouldn't slay you right about now." Seraphine glowered at him with a pale face.  
"Wait till we get Kabroz to lift the spell on us and THEN I'll consider doing the deed." she continued darkly.  
"I hope that day never comes," Tetris muttered to the female Slayer as he looked scarlet-red.  
"Cause I might prove useful someday, you just never ever ever know, Seraphine Newt."  
"Useful? You? Hah, I'll laugh the day you prove useful, blood-sucker!"

* * *

"Devi, I demand you come out right now!" Hyperion-Tek yelled at the locked door. Devi was in there, still tramatised by the encounter of his descendant - he was busy worrying that he had impacted the timeline in some major unforseen way...  
"I don't wanna come out!" Devi sounded just like an immature child, whiny and stubborn. "YAWA!" Tek blinked in surprise.  
"Is he still in there?" questioned Duke Whirlwind as he checked on his young ancestor, "I would like to meet him."

"It has been three months already," sighed Misako, "Three dreary long months of chaos and mayhem... Devi, ever considered the fact that as long as this distorted timeline remains, we're stuck here?" Inside his room, Devi listened and shook head.  
"NO! I don't want to risk erasing myself from the timeline? Have you watched _'the Butterfly'_ sci-fic movie?"  
"Is it one of those crazy movies where this guy happens to go to the past and erases the future instead?" The Oeyken asked.  
"Yeah-! Exactly. And I don't want to do that!" Devi shuddered in fear... Whirlwind quirked his eyebrow in surprise.

"Maybe we were sent here not to interfere, but to cause something major to happen here." offered Vixen supportively.  
"Anyway, the fact most of us met our descendants musty mean at some point the Starship went back to Soluna city..." "I still don't understand, if me and Devi met our great-grandchildren, then where is your one Vixen?" Spooky music played...  
"Don't ask me questions, you're the most philosophical one here, besides time logic makes my head hurt...!"  
"And where are we going to find crystallised Dragon-Fire?! This town doesn't produce Dragon-Fire crystals." Devi yelled.  
"Don't know." Misako gave up on this confusing talk. Too confusing!

* * *

  
"Augerthorne has fallen!" screamed Artix as he ran through the inn, flapping his arms like a wingless chicken.  
Everyone looked up in shock. "You heard me, there's not much hope now!" the Paladin continued saying. Seraphine stepped out (she borrowed someone's dress to wear) "So, what's the big news, ol' gold Paladin?"  
"The town of Augerthorne has been lost to the Devourer - we have no choice but to attack instead of defend towns."  
"Whoa, whoa, whoa." Devi protested, lifting his arms in confusion. "I'm not going to be dragged into one of the battles!"

"We'll drag you all kicking and screaming into the battlefield," promised Artix. "I think we have the reinforcements...!"  
Devi sweat-dropped as he realised that this was no situation he could talk out of... "Oh great," he stated.  
"What are we waiting for?!" Tetris yelled, his vampire instincts kicked in, "I love long and drawn out battles!"  
"Things have been too quiet lately, I'll join reinforcements," Seraphine glared at our Soluna trio, "... come as well."

"This has got to be an April fool's joke." Misako stated. Artix shook his head, "Sorry gal, April fool's over." She turned pale.  
"And whose smart alec idea is this anyway? Who or what is the Dakittu Devourer?!" exploded Devi. "Is it a monster?"  
"Worst, the Devourer... devours worlds, eats them. We're doomed, we only have couple of months - if we're lucky."  
Everyone turned to the new speaker, Devi's eyes popped out at the purple elf-lady. "Helllooo beautiful elf-lady!"  
"Charmed to see you, I'm Lavastria... Mighty elf lady of the south. I've heard of your arrival and the huge space-ship."  
"Are you one of the Charmed ones?" Vixen asked, everyone looked at her. "What? You never watched _Charmed?"_

"It's a loooong story, trust me!" Seraphine laughed, "You wouldn't know the gist of it."  
The Slayer looked excited and her ears stop twitching at battle - finally, something to look forwards to!  
"Can we fight them," She asked heroically, "No, we can't!" roared the rest of the mixed-up group...  
"Fine, I'll go solo then," Seraphine pouted, "Excluding Tetris and Lavastria."  
"They're coming," Tek stated, "Time to get into Mechas and start wrecking chaos and destruction around the town of-"  
_"We get the point, miss Tek."_ Twilly hopped up and down on the gold-Mecha, examining it.

"YEEEEEHAAAA! Undead from hallowed ground, spread doom and gloom throughout Augerthorne!" Trinenna yelled.  
"Wow, and I thought we were related." Misako stared at her descendant. "Seems like you're a lot stranger than me."  
"And who is the one with the huge looking Mecha then?" Tetris finally remembered what a mecha was...  
The poor mage freaked out when a zombie out of nowhere arose from the ground, along with dead dragons... "EEEK!" The 'childish' vampire leapt two feet in the air. "I told you- I detest zombies?!" he screamed at Trinenna. The necromancer glared...  
_"Not now, we have a highly dangerous battle to fight! For honour! For FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEDOOOOOMMMM!"_ Everyone did another anime fall at the statement as Twilly spoke high-pitched. _"Oh noes, did I overdoes it?"_ he squeaked afraidly.  
"Neeway, we have a lot on our side - mechas, necromancers, dukes and..." Artix glanced again, "Idiots. SO LET'S rawk this joint like its medieval!"  
"I'm scared!" Tek wailed.

"Wow, finally, the last standown, an epic moment." Seraphine said excitedly as she and Lavastria faced off... A spider?!  
"I thought there would be tougher opponents! Bring them on, bring them on!" screamed the Slayer. WHAP! WHAP! WHEW!  
"It looks like you got your wish," Lavastria commented as the huge spider splurged out several huge web-sacks...  
"Hey brain-drain spider! Look yon here, a nice vampire's coming ya way!" Tetris yelled as he plunged his fangs into the spider.  
"I'm stuck! I can't move. It's hardening over me..." Seraphine gasped as the web hardened. "Lavastria, the arrows."

WHIIIZZZZ! One arrow soared and thunked into spider, another one. Spider screeched with anger as it continued charging.  
"AAGGH!" Tetris said, "It's useless. My poor fangs." Even in her state, the female had to grin at that one.  
"I think we made it angry. You wouldn't like the spider when its angry." Lavastria commented.  
"Are you just gonna stand there, or are you helping!" Seraphine snapped as she held her weapons,  
"Trifle! Fuzzy! Aleco!" Three pet Truffles came out meeping. "Meep - meep - MEEP!" they all cried at once...  
"Attack the huge hairy one!" Slayer Seraphine said, pointing mistakenly at the wrong direction.  
"MEEP!" They all attacked Tetris and the owner sighed in fustration at how the battle was... "Not that one-!"  
"AAARRRHH! My hairs on fire, now I'm drenched and hair-dried at the same time!" The mage was very angry.  
The dark spider jabbed at once with its long and pincer-like claws.

"Owch! Tetris, you're just standing there... Do something... errr... vampric for a change." Seraphine's voice was now a tiny bit dazed as Lavastria just stood there looking at the monster... "Alright-! Here I come! It's me time to shine! Firebat swarm!" boomed the vampire mage as he summoned the best of his ability - which very sadly wasn't much compensation...  
The brain-draining spider just dodged the firey elemental animals...  
"Oh dammit!" Tetris swore as Lavastria took a step back in fear...

* * *

"What is that thing?!" exclaimed Robina as a huge green Drakel with too many legs entered the scene.  
"It's ghastly and awful to behold... Look at its legs too many legs and arms to hit"  
"I don't want to know, looks like its flexing its muscles." Gold mecha observed. "But you can't make me go near it...!"  
"I dare you to go ten feet near it," yelled Trinenna, "But we can handle it, right Devi? DEVI?" There was the sound of running.  
"I honestly don't want to participate in any major events!" the red mecha screamed as the Superfreake Drakel roared and started to charge... Just then, there was a loud yell from our favourite Paladin as Superfreak looked up.  
"Hey big boofy Drakel," called Artix as he cleaved one of the Drakel's arms, green liquid spurted eveywhere.

"What dowedo? what dowedo?" Misako yelled in a panic as the monster approached the mecha.  
"I have a great idea!" inputted Devi brightly, "Time to play Mechaball!" Everyone stared... "Hardcore bowling-" he translated.  
"Oh no, you're not going to test it out! Watch out!" Robina yelled as Devi punted Misako's robot at the Superfreak.  
"Devi! If I survive this, I'm going to rue you for what haaaaappppennns!" yelled the green haired Oeyken as she ejected from her mecha just in time... The Superfreak was surprised as the gold mecha exploded just like that - the monster now fainted due to pure shock.  
"Time to do the Rick roll' dance!" cheered Devi's mecha as it started to dance on top of the green Drakel. "oooh yeah...!"  
Trinenna was of course dismayed by these events, she glared at Devi with anger in her blazing eyes.  
"Pilot DEVI! You shouldn't be celebrating! What about my ancestor!" the lady roared at the Soluna pilot who looked stunned...  
"Oops," realised Devi as at that moment, by pure luck, his mecha caught Misako's eject-pod in midair... "There ya go! Saved...!"  
"This is even weirder than seeing Cysero turning the Guardian Tower upside down!" commented Robina as Artix nodded...  
"I probably need to contact Juan, I haven't heard from that Paladin youth for awhile," Artix commented as he sliced an undead.  
"AAAARRRHHH!" yelled Tetris at the other side of the messy (noisy) battlefield. "We have a situation here! Everyone!"

* * *

"(pant) (pant) Spider's too strong, must perserve energy." Tetris panted as he tried to keep Brain-drain spider away. "Seraphine, are you alright in that corner of the battlefield?!" Unfortunately, the spider seemed to have drained her wits away.  
"Duhhhh... Of course I'm ooookay." Seraphine sounded REALLY dopey right now. Tetris sweatdropped, now he had a situation.  
"Great, at this rate she'll be dumber that moi, which isn't a bad thing. Hopefully not permenent." He shuddered at the thought. Other than that, the poor Slayer kept missing her target, WHOOSH! Lavastria was kneeling as Spider radiated darkness.  
"Hurry up Seraphine, that spider's already gaining on us! RRRAAARRRH!" Tetris launched himself on the spider and it bucked...  
"We shall prevail, we are the three Soluna pilots! (hey that should be our catchphrase!)" said Devi. Everyone disagreed.  
"Whatever, CHARRRRRGE!" yelled the three musketeers (oops, typo) Soluna pilots... They crashed into each other. SMASHHH!  
"Next time, I shall lead the charge." screamed Vixen as her mecha kicked uselessly in a ditch. "Who shall save us all?!"

Just then... "AVAUST! I, the Whirlwind, shall spiral away all rivals!" Duke Whirlwind came onto the scene, whirling like a blustery... tornado. The Duke was so happy at this turn of events that he transformed into his element - centrifugal air...  
His wind was so strong, the tornado literally blew away the spider, which crashed into the Devourer's soldiers...  
The response of the Darkness soldiers and monsters was to run away from the Duke...  
"Tornado!" They screamed, "Run for coverrrraaahhh!"

"That was pretty much uncalled for!" yelled everyone over the rushing and roaring winds the Duke was creating.  
Instantly... "So how did everyone like my wind magic?" asked Duke happily oblivious of the destruction and chaos he had caused... Everyone was staring daggers at the Duke, but was grateful that the monster rampage had stopped.  
"That was very well done," stated Artix as Trinenna glared at the Duke Whirlwind at the Paladin's comment.  
"Excuse me, Paladin, but how long is that Slayer going to be like that for?" asked one of the girls. Artix grimaced .  
"Approximately half a day, so plenty of time to spare...!" Artix stated. Everyone did another anime-fall at that...  
"What are you guys all falling for?" giggled Seraphine childishly. Tetris sweatdropped, hopefully it would wear off soon.

On the West side of Battleon...  
"NOOOO! You can't." yelled a stranger with slitted eyes and normal peasant clothing... Juan grinned at the response as he held a Brain-slug in one gloved hand... "Sorry, but I'm on Nightbane's orders, beastly Lycan... Purple Squid octopus thingy attach!"  
The brain-slug (or should it be squid) squeaked before it attached to its new owner who fell like a stone.  
_"I am under your commands, Paladin Juan. What you wish for me, I will do at the discrement of - Hey, there's mud! YAAAAYYY!" _yelled the infested owner, who leapt in a puddle happily splashing... Juan sighed, back to square one...!  
"Hopefully those slugs breed asexually and will multiply over short time. Nightbane shall be pleased with the progress."


	14. Of Slayers, Lycans and Fleas

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

After spending a untypically naive day of complete easy questions, such as 'Where is the Guardian tower?' over and over again and 'Where are we going? Wheee!', Seraphine felt rather tired and worn out and fell into the inn bed (with anguished looks from Tetris) snoring like a prehistoric monster... Artix and all the others, especially Tek, sighed with relief after that ordeal - the Slayer had regressed to the mentality of a five year old and had the super-high hyperactivity to go with it... Including the whining and complaining... "Gwzzzrrrr... grrrllzzz..." Grizzled sounds blasted off the walls.

"I'm glad that stage's over." Devi commented with a half-grin, "Babysitting's no easy task...!" The pilot complained.  
"Yes, riiiight." Misako was laughing at the irony, "We have a regressive Slayer here. What could go wrong...?"  
"Uhhh. Guys," Vixen pointed out - "It looks like Seraphine needs..." she whispered as her friend groaned.  
"Why does all the babysitting tasks go to us?!" grumbled Devi, "Yay for us. Official nannies. It looks like Sera hasn't washed her hair in ages... Ewww. Look at her hair, it's still bright green. I have a bright idea." Mischief filled smile filled his face. "Tonight-"  
"Tonight we trim her hair?!" Misako added, nodding cheerfully. "Sure! Seraphine needs a new hairstyle." Vixen shook her head.  
"Then it's settled. Get out the scissors...! It's just gonna be like HAL over again." Devi cheered.  
Misako facefaulted, "Only one question- two actually! Where's the shampoo and hair products?" A lone cricket chirped...

"Aw, she looks so innocent," snickered Twig much later, "Like a little baby...!" The yellow Moglin bounced around in glee as Twilly glared at Twig. "Uhh... I mean, I wuv ice-cream and fishes." Twig squeaked as Tek squee-ed in delight at Twig...  
"SQUEE! Cute Moglins!" Tek added, hugging the Moglin like a plushie. "I am not a Care bear?!" Twig protested.  
Tetris, being a vampire, hated the entire day after Augerthorne - why was he stuck with a childish teenager for the day?! So the idiotic mage-assistant took to his dark closet and closed the door behind him... "AITSCHOO!" he sneezed, it was dusty.

"Geisunheit." stated Artix cheerfully. Everyone (minus Seraphine) was surprised. "What? Oh, I know lots of languages!"  
"Says you." yelled Duke Whirlwind, "I know about eight languages by heart..." Trinenna rolled her eyes in vain, she knew all of his tricks and trades from travelling. Tek the mechanic sniggled at the weird statement.  
"Name one of them then...!" she dared the The Duke's masked face turned purple, as he tried to remember something... "Uhhhh... I can't think of them right now, senorita. Jescher Auytri non Sager...!" FLWMP! Everyone fell. "Well, amigos, it's are late and we have a busy day herd of us. Night!" added the Duke. Everyone sweatdropped. "He has bad grammar...?!"

* * *

Then... "Ah, at least that Alvenos, Finch won't be bothering me tonight...! All the merrier!" Misako grinned as she went to her 'room' to sleep (which was right next to you-know-who's room)... She was humming cheerfully a familar tune from a movie.  
"I can't even wait for tommorow! Monsters here I come. Heheheh." The Oeyken chuckled... "Night Devi."

"Night Misako!" screamed Devi as he tumbled out of the bunk bed at once, "HEY! I told you not to move the bed!" A male Berserker smirked and swore in a weird language. "AJEHRIRHRURUE..." he stated. Devi growled and sweatdropped.  
"Forget it, for last time I'm not going to fluff your firking-" Devi shouted, before he saw the bloody-big mace hanging near the bed... "I'll reconsider." the Soluna pilot added hastily as Mr. Berserker grinned sinsterly... "I don't like the look you're giving me." His friend burst out laughing. "IT'S NOT FREAKING FUNNY, Koko. I can hear you from the other side!" Silence. "Better...!"  
"Scene from _the Godfather_ movie." Berserker said to Devi as the Pilot awoke again. And found giant Drakel head next to him...!  
"AAAAHHH! A head!" Devi screamed, tossed the head away and had nightmares hours later...

In the middle of the night- "WARK! RAFF! RAFF!" Misako woke up again and found herself - hanging from the ceiling for a very spooky reason... "HUH-? HowthekelfdidIgetup here?!" The girl yelled in terror as she spotted that Seraphine's bed next room was empty...! Tetris was sleepwalking around upstairs as usual. "Someone! Get me down from here! Please for toffees?!"  
"Raffk...?" A large human-sized wolf padded in, a ball in its mouth, large pink tongue lolled on the side. Misako froze. "A dog?"

"WARK-! WARK-!" The collie-wolf had a puppyish expression on its face, smiling happily. It crouched and pounced around.  
Misako let go of the ceiling and landed on her bed again. "It's so cute...! You want to play." The 'dog' nodded childishly...  
"WAFF! ARC! ARC! Tyoof." The animal bounced around, waking everyone up at once... They were furious.  
"Who let the dogs outtttt?!" Artix and Han's roared. "No animals in here...! Out...!" They yelled at wolfie who shot outside.  
"Seraphine's missing." Vixen ran in, "She's gone!" Everyone stared. "Only her Slayers clothes were left." People gasped...

* * *

"Urrff." groaned Seraphine the puppy-Lycan

To be continued, so watch this chapter for updates!


	15. Anzu Lake switch

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage - **The 'Anzu Lake Switch'

Author's note: This chapter's mainly a parody of Ranma 1/2 and Transformers. Enjoy!

_'Time to fly,' reasoned a bat-winged figure arising from the darkness like a soaring jet, whirling and soaring above the bluish-black cloud-hued skies. Casting away all its hellish thoughts, the furred creature embraced the instincts as it roared in rage, in sorrow for what had become of it... Would anyone forgive the tyranny of races that had shunned these creatures of mixed purity, they were always fighting against them... And yet, it felt at peace, observing the aerial domain... It was the creature of both the rushing air and the encroaching darkness of Darkovia woodland. All subraces cowered at the thought of it. Clutching the silvery charm bracelet in its large clawed paws, it howled for freedom and mercy for itself... It was a release of the anger it had felt licking against the forbidding night. The shining charm shone with a cold bright light, harsh in its brilliance... If Seraphine knew its dark secret, she would never forgive it. 'Never.'_

* * *

"Devi!" Seraphine roared once she stormed back to the inn, once realising what happened earlier those last nights. Once the Slayer had regained her thoughts and intellect, she had found that her hair was cropped off by someone. Someone who had shoddy skills at cutting hair (Now the hair Seraphine had looked as bad as a Mermazon's worst hair day). And who better to question than the new arrivals? _Surely they had something to do with the shameful act?!_ Seraphine felt the hairs at the back of her neck rising in renewed anger as she slammed open the door with a ferocious growl that would hopefully scare Devi and the others... But then she froze. No one was there... Except for that idiot Tetris who seemed happy. And that blind Sage.

"Hello," said Sage Uldor, grasping her hand and feeling it blindly. _Oh, its that fortune telling mage again._ Seraphine reasoned, rolling her eyes in the way her luck had turned out... She had no time for this nonsense, she didn't believe in the divination anyway, it was useless for Adventurers like herself. Plus, that sage didn't seem to tell the difference between yogurt and tomato sauce, if that proved something... And he nearly always got his prophecy wrong, Seraphine remembered the time that that Sage predicted that she would win the lottery at Kroves-Port - Only to be chased out of town by swashbackin' pirates of the 'Carribean Seas' who tried to steal the rest of her shiny gold... "Got any more unfortunate events for me?"

Sage Uldor seemed to sense agitation at his upcoming doomed prediction, "I can see the future," the Sage said mysteriously.  
"Ohhhh... I don't have time for this." The slayer muttered, gritting her teeth as she noticed that Uldor was laughing. Seraphine was confused at this, why was he laughing...?  
"What did you see in my future?" Tetris asked very eagerly, the fun-loving mage was soaking up everything Uldor said. "You see vict- Umm... girls for me to su- I mean donate for charity?" Uldor chuckled mysteriously... VERY mysteriously.

"Neither, I see your future is clouded. Arktos, it seems as though you will find girls of your dream in many months to come - only to be slayed by a familar person, or even a Avatar from the Greenguard Temple." Sage Uldor laughed at the irony... Tetris face-faulted at this and glaring at Seraphine, who seemed curious at this prediction. "Mysterious," he muttered.  
"WE know that already!" yelled the Slayer rather impatiently. Uldor looked disraught. "Your 'third eye' needs fixing, sage."  
"Oh really. Then I see a doomed future for you." Uldor commented dramatically. _BOOM-!_ Loud thunder flashed outside.  
"Where did the thunder come from?" Tetris wondered, looking around excitedly. Seraphine said, 'Coincidence.' _BOOM-!  
_  
"What did you say??" The Sage rasped as he cupped his ears in profound deafness. _BOOM-!_ The scary thunder crashed again... "I said... COINCIDENCE." Seraphine yelled loudly, only for the bright lighting to flash again. Uldor nodded gravely, grasping her hand on his gnarled elderly cane. He looked sleepy (His facial expressions looked slacking) Sage went to sleep, snoring like an old man - Well he WAS an old man anyway. Seraphine sweatdropped and shaking him awake. "What's my fated?!"  
"One pepperoni Dragon-Deluxe pizza, Maza... Wha-?" Uldor grumbled, glaring through the blindfold. Tetris had a fit of laughter at his weary expression.

"Yes, your future is fated. You are destinied to find out an ancient history that you never had wished to discover, and you will learn of a dark little proverb: Blood is thicker than water... Transcend on the ink-splattered pages of Darkovian Lore, changing the fate of thousands of subraces and humans as you progress towards your goal. An enemy will turn out to be closer than you think. Many races conjure plans against your Solunian friends, wishing to gain vast powers of past and present. Don't let those races capture those Solunians and all will go well. If not... DOOOM awaits you all and darkness will rise."  
Seraphine looked skeptical at this, but she was concerned at the prophecy about the three Solunian people...

"You shall always be a fugitive, accepted by no subrace. This is what your new fate holds, but it is all up to your final decisons. Are you up to the task?! Your next location you seek is Anzu Lake." Sage continued, fierce little glint in his 'eyes'.  
"Okay, the ol' man is scaring me," Seraphine admitted loudly, yanking Tetris with her as she rushed out the door...  
"Come on, we're off to that Anzu Lake, like that hippy old Sage said... I bet I can have a word with Devi...!"

"I didn't ask to come, Slayer Seraphine... Ahh! The light, it's so bright!" Tetris winced as Seraphine started towing him as she transformed back into her Lycan form... Seraphine started running at the speed of sound, zooming past meadows and other growling monsters who chased after them with a strange little venagence...  
"Slow down! GEEZ, you're breaking the speed limit, wanna ticket?" Tetris complained, glaring. "You're going supersonic."  
_"You mean like really, really fast?"_ The Slayer winked, _"Thanks." _Tetris groaned, he didn't mean that as a compliment...!

* * *

"- and that's how I managed to fix that Sea-dragon good. my mecha bashed the ebil monstorous Thefarus with a whopping big hammer the size of Soluna and then it fainted and landed on ten naval Star-ships which were the size of the Walque-Sun temples, the end. Finale, conclusion. Plus I got a big bonus." finished Devi as he relaxed at the Anzu Lake resort, reading a scroll written by Wurthiner the mage. He was wearing a pair of spectacles for reading. "Perchance, I love a good tale every now and then. Hah, I hope Seraphine doesn't come after me for that trick with her hair and all! Hey, is that Trinenna?" The trickster questioned.

Duke Whirlwind who was listening to the story, was in awe at this 'recount' that Devi gave out. "Sanchos-! Wow, you were so brrrrave and powerful." Duke stated as he sat on the ground cross-legged. He never took off his mask, not even now. He was very impressed with the whole tale. Devi smiled more, his boast paid off. "Why thank you," he said conscendenly at this.  
"No sire," The scholar, Ranhma Lamaa Diquon stated, suddenly approaching. Devi jumped, scattering his scrolls everywhere.

"You scared me," Devi yelled nervously as the scholar gave a small gentle smile. "Must you enter with no warning?"  
"A deadly, mysterious lady - Lady Aki of the 'Sneak' Martial-Art temple - requests for you." Ranhma yelled. Devi blinked.  
"Wowzers, must you talk like that?" Devi demanded. Scholar grinned at that statement, it was Lady Aki's request.  
"She's arriving just to see you..." At this Devi's face started blushing furiously, Scholar Ranhma looked comically puzzled.

"Did I alarm you?" the monk spoke softly. Duke was at once running towards the temple at the statement 'Mysterious lady.'  
"Not at all, not at all...!" Devi laughed bravely, hiding his face. "Woohoo! A lovely Oeyken to see," he muttered lustfully.  
"And a gutsy one too," added Ranhma, asking the Alvenous to stand "The test she will send out is to make sure you are an eunuch..." Devi looked alarmed at provoking statement, he did not want to be made an 'eunuch', whatever that was...?!  
"AAARRRG." screamed Devi once Ranhma explained the meaning, his eyes twitched, "Ewww." Ranhma grinned.  
"It's a very painless procedure, I went through it... Are your other friends male?" he questioned. Devi shook his head.  
"I want my mama." Devi whimpered softly as he gripped the statue of the silvered Sneak... "I thought this custom died out...!"  
"Times a-changing," yelled Ranhma, dragging Devi's feet. "When ya gotta go," Devi screamed in anger at this response... "NO!" The Martin cried out, trying in vain to get away from the monk.

Meanwhile, Vixen was on her own, staring at the lake as another monk blabbed about all sorts of info about the mystical powers it possessed, including the ancient legends associated with it. "So, this is Anzu Lake," Vixen glanced at the shimmering lake, it sparkled quietly and peacefully and... well, what did you expect? "Hmm, I wonder where that Martin has gotten to?" she wondered, not knowing that the monk was STILL talking about the Lake's curse for over fifteen minutes. If she was listening to that old monk, then she would have heard this information (but she didn't):

"If you look to your left, that's the legendary Anzu Lake. Now, legend has it that Anzu Lake has been cursed for nearly 100 years aforementioned at least once before, ever since the four legendary martial arts temples were raised up by the scholars of Keld Ner Island. No one had ever dared to touch the lake's waters because of sacred beliefs of its intensity to curse anything that goes within its depths. Even a few drops of the precious water is required for the curse to activate as a whole. It is therefore mentioned that the last person who dived to the bottom of the lake had drowned in the lake and the magical innate power or Force emited from his once pure body then turned him into the opposite gender... Ecetera, ecetera ad-infinium..." the monk droned on, as suddenly there was heard a loud scream from the other side of the lake. Vixen turned, "What?"

"I've got you now," screeched Seraphine back in human form as she grabbed Devi by the white hair, "You did what to my gorgeous hair?! You're really getting on my nerves, you Martin." Ranhma tried to pull the growling Slayer back towards the temple. "Obliviate him, extinguish that Martin, whatever it takes to get what he deserves...!" Seraphine began yelling as the young scholar kicked off the vampire still at her feet. The silly vampire-mage laughed dumbly and Ranhma blundered clumsily...  
"Hey, kicks won't work!" Tetris laughed as he started baring his regrown teeth... "Immortal plus your worst nightmare."  
"WAAAAH?! A nightmare?!" Ranhma screamed in fright and released Devi at once, making the alien fall backwards...

Steam poured from the Slayer's ears as she glared at Devi, yelling curses at him for the entire country of Anzu town to hear...  
"Scoundrel! Sneaky-eyed, livered coward who performs pedicure! Skull of Eldron the good." Seraphine now shouted, storming up to the poor Martin who looked so scared. "You were a trickster who elks shampoo! RAAARR!!" Everyone looked up.  
"I can't take this anymore." At this, Devi rushed up the pier, with the Slayer still hot on his trail and plunged into the lake. Seraphine lost her footing on the wooden deck and tripped into the cursed lake as well, "Oh for Lariat's-" _SPLASH!  
_"Oh no, they're drowning!" shouted Ranhma, he was hopping on one foot then the other in absolute panic and waving his arms frantically. Vixen was just about ready to dive in.  
"Hang on!" The human yelled out to the water, "Grab my hands!"

_"Hell!" _A masculine voice screamed as Seraphine nearly went under... Bubbles floated past as suddenly someone burst out of the water as well, gasping for air. But unexpectedly it was discovered much easier to swim, doing the freestyle easily with powerful haunches and arms which kicked up foam and water.

The Slayer secretly wasn't sure why, but it seemt that it was easier to see other things as well, such as cold objects and hot objects... Vixen grabbed the arm which was free and dragged, pulling the person out of the water. "Devi! You're okay!" she grinned happily. At the name, Seraphine froze at this, touching the nauesating white shimmering hair in disgusted terror...  
Freaking voice she yelled out wasn't hers! Sounded macho and upbeat. What the- was more egostatic and... Did she dare say it? Sexy. _Shooot. _Glancing at new reflection in the water, the 'shemale' noticed... This was worst than she thought, glancing at the lake. Her 'body' was over there, frantically paddling back to shore in a funny fashion befitting of Devi.  
"I'm a freaking alien teenage male?! How am I gonna fight?!" Seraphine screamed out. Vixen looked confused at this.

_"Kelf!"_ yelled a feminine voice, nearly drowning in Devi's attempt to dog-paddle back to the shore. Being a Martin, he wasn't used to swimming, much less getting soaked! He was startled and horrified by the high-pitched voice he had literally screeched out, _the shame!_ "This better work." he cursed, "I can't swim to shooooooore!" Finally making it (after over 20 minutes of non-stop paddling), Devi panted on the shore and heaved with exhaustion. Shocked, he realised the worst news... Clutching 'his' chest and staring down the collar of 'his' Slayer Uniform, Devi looked like a pervert just about then:  
"Wace?! Those firking bumps on my chest! Am I gonna fight with my uber mecha as an useless Oeyken?! Oooh, how embarrasing this is!" Devi stated girlishly as Ranhma fell off in pure shock at hearing this information.

After a couple of stupid minutes, the two kept staring at each other in horror. Staring and blinking. Staring and-  
"If you are who I think they are, there's simple test to identify you two." Vixen smirked with glee. Devi and Seraphine stared.  
"AND you going to do that? I'm a freaking Oeyken!" Devi hissed, "See?!" The human just pointed at the clear sky (which very luckily was void of anything other than winged Eye-monsters... Or Eye-pods)  
"Look! Eragon's gonna get behind you!" she announced calmy. At once, Devi's 'female' body looked frantic at this...

"Where?! Lorithia's sake?! A dragon?? I want to go home!" Devi screamed, looking like he had a bad case of fear... Looking very scared, the switched Martin nearly jumped in the lake again... (if Tetris didn't stop him, who knows what happens)  
"Out of this alien body, don't wanna have a sausage... er, what's the word." Seraphine yelled deeply, "Tetris! Slap him, right now... He's stealing my form... Body-snatcher and coward." Devi looked weird, covering up 'his' chest as much as possible.  
"Are you calling me a firking coward?! Pacman feeeever." Devi glared. Vixen sighed, this was a crazy situation...

The 'female' Soluna pilot grinned at an idea. "I'm gonna... Dance in a disco! YEEEHA!" The pilot boogied and scatted a weird rap as Seraphine's face was... bored and furious. "I didn't know that form coolski!" giggled Devi, "I could danc-"  
The Slayer mustered up a yell,"Don't you dare! Don't use my form in this crude manner. After all, it's my bod-"  
"Morning. Must be the pilot I assume?" A firm hand slammed on Seraphine's shoulder. Tetris goggled at the lady, _GIIIIIRLLS_. his parasite mind screamed in delight. Poor Vixen glanced as Lady Lady Aki came through the glade, bringing escorts.  
"Good morning," stated Misako cheerfully as she came out from the escorts, "Hi Seraphine, great to see you Devi!" Devi looked like he would die than let Koko see him as a girl. "Wace? Oh great," she cocked her head, "Jumped in the cursed lake like you always do. Just as I had predicted! Typical Alvenos." Seraphine let out little laugh at Devi's frowned face...!

"Explanation?" Lushian looked confused at Vixen, "Maybe your friends here can request our assistance." Ranhma looked eager, Lushian sweatdropped. "Not you, Ranhma!" the lady scolded. "You are always lying to newcomers to Anzu..."  
"Eheheh..." sweated the scholar as Devi realised the lie. "But that curse DID do the deed." Lushian sighed in regret...  
"This always happens. First was the noodle incident, then was the merging spell and now this... I really should put warning signs around the lake saying: _Keep out of the Water_ or _Cursed Lake is closer than appears." _

"Give me my dignity back!" argued Seraphine as Devi examined the censored bits mentioned earlier... 'He' chuckled at seeing the new form, twirling around in joy. "WHEEE!" The pilot yelled, "Finally, a way to hit on the Oeykens faster than anyone!" He had a charming smile on stolen face, "Cheer up Que-Sera-Sera! At least you're not worse off than before. Get used to this kind of treatment... Just think, girls walk up to me, the next minute KAPOW! Instant date."  
"You're gonna have blind-dates back in Soluna in that body..." Tetris grinned, "Can I hitch a ride?!"  
"100 ways to lose a blind date," groaned Misako at that prospect. "I can imagine your intro: Hi I'm Devi and I am a handsome girl, with matchmaker vampire. That'll _really_ turn on the Oeykens." Seraphine said nothing.

BOOM! _"TRANSFARMERS- Farmers in Disguise!"_ yelled a farmer, wearing 10 pieces of ammunition, five missiles and nothing but an iron cast-body. Nobody took notice of the farmer, who did anime fall at this. "HELLLOOOO?!" screamed the farmer.  
_"Did you hear something?"_ asked Twilly who arrived out of nowhere. Tek shook her head, "Nope." The farmer-mecha screamed om agony, but still no one noticed his yells and screams. "AAAARRRRH!" The farmer shot a huge missile at the temple.  
"Hyperion Tek Jutsu!" yelled Tek, transforming into... A small chibi. "Oops," yelled an annoying high pitched voice which squeaked, "I blame this on the author!" Tek ran back and forths trying to dodge the missles. _VROOM! FSSSH! KAPOW!_

* * *

BOOM! RKKRIIR! KAPOOOZ! CHAKA CHAKA! the sounds grew louder.  
"What the effing heck was that?!" exclaimed Tetris, being a bad boy as always. Seraphine forgot she was 'borrowing' Devi's body (or at least she hoped so) and slapped him again. WHAM-! Big mistake, the mage bared his teeth and flew 7 metres away. The result meant that Tetris saw flashihg stars for a minute. "WHAT was that for?! screamed Tetris-" Tetris realised he was talking in the third person and blushed. It was a weird experience. That never happened to him before. It was fun.

"That was for swearing," Seraphine yelled as she noticed something _worse_. Devi's response was to check out 'his' new body, earning another slap from the Slayer. _WHAM-! _"Don't look at myself that way!" she screamed.  
"I like being you so far... I wouldn't wanna swap this for the world!" yelled Devi in delight... KAFOOOSH! A missle landed near the lake. Devi's look facepalmed. "Except for that. How do I fight in this state?!" 'He' added, while running away... 'He' tripped over. Everyone near the lake had to run as well...

"Lessee... Weapons- Ice arrows, some sort of gooky Dakittu staff, light-sabre, a shield... WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?!" Devi realised that he didn't know anything about fighting by hand... Just his stupid luck!  
"Devi or whatever you are right now." Ranhma shouted, "You can't win this fight!" Seraphine nodded.  
"I'm gonna try!" raged Devi, grabbing an (unplugged) microphone and a speaker from nowhere. "I'm gonna sing Karoke and get killed trying! _We are the CHAAAMPIONS, flyyyinnggg withoooout winnngs!" _Awful loud high-pitched singing echoed.

At this awful singing everyone didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this...  
"Why can't we command our mechas?" Misako added as she ran for her life, "Oh no. They're back in Battleon...!" Seraphine realised something. "Not all of them. I saw Devi's mecha right over near this area... NOW if I can just touch it from here..."  
"This is like commiting a major death-wish... For you that is. You don't have a pilot's liscene, Sera." groaned Vixen, "You want to try? Go ahead and make our day... TRASH that missile." Tetris sneered at that...  
"Whew, all in a day's work." The mage laughed.Seraphine climbed up the red mecha. It was hard since she didn't have the keys with her. Oh wait, now she did...

"Ooookay. This should be easy." The slayer looked upon rows of flashing buttons and levers in the cockpit. She cursed whoever designed the mecha. "Or maybe not..." the she-male looked blankly upon the screen in front of 'her'. What?! If 'she' just put her foot on the hollow shiny thingy, maybe there would be working. "Here goes nothing-!" Seraphine yelled excitedly. Hell, even this was exhilirating! Now she could see why dumb boys were so excited by gadgets... First trial. 'PRESS!' went the green shiny button. _KABOOM-!_ The mecha jerked forwards and collasped in a heap...

"WHAT JUST HAPPENED...!!" Seraphine screamed as the screen flickered to life. "This is a junk! Devi should get a better mecha for any event. Wait till I get my claws on him." This sucked even more. 'She' wanted to get this fight done as soon as possible, if even sooner. "I wonder what this bit _does."_ 'She' pulled the lever and immediately got a warning signal: _Prepare to liftoff.  
__"Lift-off?!"_ she wasn't prepared for that, slamming a four-fingered hand on the controls, "I don't like this mecha already..." 'She' looked towards the readers in acknowledgement. "Oh drat, I need to get this junk off the ground."_ KAAAAAPOOOSH! _it went.  
YYYYAAAAAAHHHHH! Poor Seraphine yelled as the mecha took off at 20 km/ph. But it wasn't the red mecha itself...

It was... It was... THE DOOOOMMMM! Nah, just kidding. It was the farmer-mecha spinning the red one around. :)

"I assume that Slayer's annoyed," Tetris grinned in satisfaction, "Serves her right for messing with da man! Devi is da man!"  
"I forgot to tell Sera you don't press the green button," Devi laughed as everyone stared... Did he get out of that one?  
"YOU COULD HAAAAVE toold me that!" Seraphine screeched when farmer-mecha exploded near her. Devi smirked.  
"You know how I feel at failure!" Already girly-hormones making the Soluna pilot giddy-hyper now...  
Twilly gave him looks of confusement at this... _"Are you sure you're alright?!"_ Huge Twilly pointed out (zapped by a growing ray), carrying a heavy Chibi-Tek on his back. Everyone sighed.

"Long story..." stated Duke succintly after he had a bruised ego... "What's up honchos?" Ranhma took a deep breath.  
"Well-it-appears-that-a-male-alien-and-a-female-Slayer-swapped and (pause) a farmer-machine." This was confusing for all.  
"Who did no what in the siesta now?" Duke yelled, "Harotre!" Vixen had to explain in Spanish what happened to Duke...  
"Ooohhh... Nukes." Duke frowned, "And with Hyperion-Tek like small child, how we ganna fix this?" Twilly had a grin.  
_"You beauty!"_ yelled Twilly, "Attack farmer-mecha now... Twee!" Everyone anime-fall (except for Seraphine).  
"Remind me to wake up from this daydream," Vixen said as the Farmer-mecha said...

"You can call... HUGGY!" The mecha-farmer squealed, hugging red-mecha. "Let's be frieeends!" Happy annoying and childish music played in the background along with rainbows and happy bunnies. _LAALALAALAAADEEE!_ Seraphine wasn't grateful.  
"This is so obnoxious," The Slayer scowled, pressing all buttons on the control. A fireball blasted a hole in the ground.  
"SERA?" Devi yelled. "You're alive or something?? Great, I get to keep this body for a while. YIPEE KAY AY YA!"

Misako looked worried for a second at this, not sure how to handle Devi being an Oeyken. Two was enough already, but three? _BOOM!_ Immediately, the seat ejected and the pod landed near Twilly. A iron door opened in the pod and fell out.  
"Sorry 'bout your Mecha, good Devi." Seraphine apologised in a male voice, Devi looked like he was going to explode again...  
"WACE?! You destroyed my mecha?" Devi yelled, "Unbelievable! Of all-" Chibi-Tek smiled cutely, she knew she could repair.  
"At least that annoying farmer-mecha is gone," said Tek in relief once everyone looked weirdly at her...  
"One question: How do we get back to normal?!" Devi yelled desperately, changing his mind about keeping it.  
_SPLASH!_ A sopping cold wet Devi glared at Vixen, who tossed a bowl of cold water, "I'm sorry, but that didn't work..."  
_SPLASH! _"Nor hot water! OW OW OW!" Seraphine yelped in pain as Devi used a hot water using Dragon spell.  
"THIS ISN'T FUNNY!" They both yelled.

"Sure this is going to work?!" screamed Seraphine, her 'male body' tied to a machine that dumped said subject into water once kicked (kinda like a 'dunking-tank' at a carnival) Devi likewise was tied to it. "I hate this machine! Isn't there any other way?!" Misako shook her head, "Nope, Sera." she chuckled at the sight as she prepared the kick that would send them plunged...  
"On command." Luishan said quietly. "You shall go now, dump that cursed water on those two..." Two of them sweat-dropped.  
"Kay! Let me see... I shall do- erm... how does '' sound?" Misako said happily as she excecuted a strong kick. FWAAP!  
"You missed again." yelled Devi gleefully. Wham! "Missed another time." Bang WIZZ WHAM! "You're really awful at this..." "You're not helping me out." said the Oeyken with gritted teeth at his comment. Seraphine was also enjoying this.

At last after countless tries, she managed to complete the tough move... "THIS IS GONNA BE MY LAST martial-arts move!" yelled Misako as at last the results happened. At once a tidal wave occured as the two switched species got dunked. The wave dumped itself on the shoreline. Shouts yelled as the two emerged from the lake water. "Wow I'm back! Thankies!" smiled Seraphine, Devi looked pleased, but disappointed that the bumps disappeared.  
_"Did anyone say NOES?!"_ Everyone turned around in shock. Wet Tek was standing behind them speaking.  
"You didn't say-?" Vixen stuttered, realising what had happened.  
"Wow?! I'm a cute Moglin!" Twilly said in Tek's voice, "KYAAAA!" She hugged itself in happiness  
"AAAAWWW!! KELF AND HELL!" Everyone freaked out at that sight and fainted...  
"Harsjir!" Duke yelled


	16. Arrival of Hope

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage -** The Arrival of Hope

Author's note: I tried to play the final part of the Devourer's battle, but I could never get past all of the monsters...! I only saw the first bit of the end. So don't blame me if the last bit of the battle is fabricated for you readers!

_One day, Tetris the vampire mage was walking in Osprey's Cove, when he decided to kick a sea-shell into the water. KABOOM! A genie popped up in front of him and he fell in. Tetris couldn't believe his luck, a harem. "You've got three wishes!" said the 'rich' genie, who looked like a clone of Galrick, plus he had a nose-ring. The dumb mage didn't even need to think. "What the balloon, I wish for an 100-horsepower double latte espresso machine." ZING! A Knife and Spork coffee-maker appeared, but it was from Soluna. It was also broken. Oh well! "Be very careful," warned the powerful and weird genie, Tetris ignored this- as always... "I wish that I was the strongest vampire in LORE!" he laughed ebilly, like Zorbak._

_BOW-CHICKA-WOW-WOW! Britney turned poor Tetris into what he said, but his renewed strength was equal to a really weak Sneevil. "Alright, good looking gal!" screamed Tetris, "This time you can't trick me. I wish for a mansion and ten girls waiting on me, and a never-ending supply of blood in a lake. Got that?!" weeeeeeeee. "What is that sound?" Tetris looked up in time, stating at this annoying noise, "I wish I did not make that wish." Too late. Weeeeeeewwww-CRAAAASH! The three storey house and all the items fell on unsuspecting vampire, squishing him. At this the ebil genie giggled 'Oops, looks like bad magic again.' The genie disappeared into sea-shell as Celestia picked it up now, wonering what it was. (DUN-DUN!)_

"It's over now, your reign of terror has been usurped from all the world. How can you desist the fate which now awaits your downfall. How can your brother (?) Slayer E overcome this tragedy. The Gailin deems you unworthy. You must be wiped away from existance. Have not been a very good boy while my master was around - have you," smirked Bailius to the Dracopyre Nightbane. The dark-brown furred Dragon-lycan looked towards the coast-shore of the Temple of Hope, realising his time was up. Flexing his dragon wings, he raged and roared as Bailius snapped his fingers twice.

The mighty Nightbane felt his strength weaken as he changed weak and weaker, until he turned into an extremely old man. He was surprised. Hoiw could Nightbane, powerful of all he reigned, now exist as a feeble and worthless man. As now the human form remerged from the snarling beast, the tall dark man-creature called the Gailin ordered his servant to stab the old man. Nightbane didn't even have time to call out revenge as he fell down. The great Nightbane had fallen.

On the sidelines, Paladin Juan looked alarmed that one of his masters had fallen, it was impossible. "Nightbane, my master! Oh how the mighty has yet to transcend," he whispered on his golden Axe, his red hair brushed metal. Juan was shocked, he never knew such power could arise from the Devourer. He felt the Gailin's red eyes set its eyes on him and he froze. He adjusted his goggles at this scene, he couldn't see well. Now he wished that Artix was there to defend him. It would be far better than this!

"Juan, false servant of Nightbane." Gailin said. The Devourer was calm. Too calm. "I have seen your power. It is weak."  
False laughs escaped from Juan's lips. "Oh, of course," Juan laughed, "I cant compare to your almighty power." He grinned, but Gailin saw through this. "Say, want to play Uno while we're at this? Poker?! Pinball." Gailin laughed in delight.  
"Ten rounds of this Terra game called... Pinball. However, the stakes are high. If I win, you forfeit your soul. If you win, you and all Paladins will be spared from Uncreation. Do we have a deal?" Poor Juan looked like he was about to faint.  
"I can't HEAR YOU!" roared the Gailin, snarling. Juan was forced to nod. _Oh dear, it's times like this, really dancing the Can-Can or the cha-cha would be easier...!_

* * *

"The Devourer's here!" shrieked Artix once more. He burst through the room waving his arms and running. "There shall be doom and damnation and even more random chaos! The end is here. The Revelations! The Aprocalypse! The UNCREATION of all Lore." No one responded, they were shocked like nothing else. They kept still. Until Robina said, "Come again?"  
"Finally, my three favourite things in the world." Trienna smiled at this speech, "Spoken by a witless nobody - specifically, cowardly Artix Von Krieger." Artix glared at the female and ran into a door. BANG! Tetris flew in as a Werebat before turning back into a vampire.

"Wowzers! The Devourer! YAY!" the mage cheered, fangs showing. He laughed stupidly at Artix's speech. Duke Whirlwind looked disturbed at the news... He knew the Devourer was no laughing matter, it was more of a threat than any evil...  
"The Devourer awaits at the peak of the Temple of Hope." Artix gasped, "And he wants a word with Tetris and Seraphine." Everyone's jaw dropped at this, almost everyone fainted... Except for Sage Uldor, who said, "The Prophecy's in motion,"  
"Carnsanit!" swore Valencia, getting up again. The treasure-hunter looked really angry, "That evil gangster Cartwright's not getting any flake from us!" Tek looked more confused at this.

"That's right, and according to Balius, Cartwright the Devourer waiting." Trienna announced, "We need an Avatar."  
"Aang from that TV series, Avatar the Last Airbender?" Vixen wondered, Artix sweatdropped. What was a TV?  
_"No time for jokes!"_ Twilly announced, _"We need to go there! AS SOOOON AS POSSIBLE!"  
_"One question, how do they all get to a temple... Miles away in Greenguard Forest!" raged Blackhawke.  
"May be I of assistance, fishes!" Twig bounced on the stairway as Devi pounced on him.  
"Gotcha ya little fiend!" Devi yelled, "Now, teleport us!" Twig shook his head as Devi got covered in ice.

* * *

"Are we there yet!" everyone yelled as a guardian Dragon carried them on their back, with Dragonlord Cyrus.  
_NOOOOEEEEES! Now shut up before I decide to crunch on your bones and eat your meals!_ yelled Alqwar. Everyone fell silent.  
"I don't like this," admitted Seraphine, arms around the dragon's neck "I have a fear of heights... Eeeeekkk! I want off!"  
"Yah? What about me!" moaned Tetris, he could feel the heating sun blistering his pale skin. "Get me off! rahaahaaa!" he glibbered in fear as Devi likewise was scared for his life, Vixen was reading a scroll.  
"At last, free air travel...!" Vixen didn't seem scared or anything and didn't seemed worried at landing... WELL, they should.  
The giant dragon went into a steep curve before landing on the sandy. ground, throwing everyone off. They landed with their heads buried in sand. "I can't breathe!" shrieked Duke, clawing at his sandy face, "My eyes are full of grit and my mouth tastes like a sandwich! _Bequaralamegos!_" Blackhawke looked funny for a moment at this statement.

"They're here," announced Bailaius to the Devourer, "every last one of those pathetic tutu-wearing dancers!" He was pleased. "Send the two known as Seraphine Newt and Tetris Arktos to me... NOW! I want to assess and examine them all." Seraphine stood her ground, defiant but worried. Tetris leapt up in the air and clawed the ground. "WAAAAHHHH! I don't wanna be an uncreated nobody with no blood and wandering the unknown for eons and ages!" the mage wailed.  
"What about Tek? She's a gooooood canditate." Devi offered, "She couldn't even fix-" The Devourer hissed, no way.  
"Seraphine, you are as unclean as those minions you serve. How dare you defy the Uncreator's ways. You even carry the Black and Red Shield of Chaos and Realignment, which shows your contempt for all Lore kind. Therefore you're worthless."  
"My origins may be suiting of chaos, but I still serve for the justice!" Seraphine yelled, "I defy your words! Ask Artix!"

"Tetris Arktos, I foresaw you are as pure as the Uncreator wishes for a servant. You are worthy of reprisal." Seraphine's eyes widened as the Devourer grinned. "No way, Tetris gets spared!" The Slayer couldn't believe the words. "NOOOOOO!!" she yelled as the Soluna pilots booed the Uncreator's comments. "I can change! I can change!" begged Sera, "I can do anything you ask for! Just spare me!" the Devourer created a ball of shadow and threw it at the Slayer repeatively and before too long, she fell to the ground, lifeless. Everyone else couldn't believe their eyes. _"WACE?!"_ they all yelled.  
"Your opponent proved most pathetic," nodded Balius to the Devourer. "Want some entrees?"  
"No thanks," Devourer laughed haughtily. "I had enough for one day."  
"Seraphine served to the bitter end." Artix announced mournfully.  
"Who's Seraphine?" asked Valencia, the Galin trying to wipe all traces of the Slayer away.

* * *

_"Am I dead? I hate this new existance!" raged a now ghostly Seraphine as she realised what happened, "crud! I never even got a chance to serve the Faluno tribe and this is how I'm repaid! A new plane of reality for me, just what I have to look forwards to. I want my mummy! I wanted to have first love! I wanted to see a Chickencow, and now I shall-" It was then she tripped over a rocky ledge. "Why me! why the humanity?! Why did the Uncreator deem me as unworthy?" Seraphine stopped her ranting once she saw the Avatar of Death. "What the hell (literally) are you doing here?" The Slayer exclaimed. "Can't you see I'm busy yelling?"  
"I can see that, Seraphine." Death said patiently, "And now I would like my item back. The hourglass."_

_"No," Seraphine's eyes knitted in sadness, clutching the hourglass to her chest. It was the only thing that she had to remind her of the outside world, the previous life she had in LORE... She turned her back on the Avatar of Death. Suddenly, she saw a figure running through the mist, it was a familiar figure she knew. The words were out before she could stop them, "Vampire Slayer E?" she spoke aloud. The cloaked figure stopped running and looked towards the remants of the Slayer, before coming forwards them._

_"Stop, Avatar of Death" commanded Slayer E softly, "Stop this. The commands of new Avatar of Death is of grave importance, your replacement is coming forth. By Ninnius's skull, you shan't harm this female Avatar of Hope!" The Slayer was confused of this... But the skeleton rose up, glaring at the man, eyes aglow. He didn't like to be called names by a mere mortal... Let alone a serious one._

_"If you expect me to retire anytime soon, you are mistaken!" gyrated Death, "I had claimed countless souls. This is no exception." Slayer E paused for a moment, eyes upon Seraphine, "But I'm your replacement, Sir Death! And by my claim, the Avatar shall go free... If she gives me something of minor importance." Death grumbled for a minute, glancing at E's contract with fine print.  
"Fine," Death yelled, reading glasses astrew. "I terminate the contract I drew up before this Seraphine came along. But mark my deadly words. If I do this, she will an ultimate immortal - When this Avatar least expects it, I shall hunt her down!"  
"Sounds threatening," Seraphine commented, Slayer E rolled his eyes as Death vanished from sight._

_"You don't wanna know the gist of it." E muttered. "Great to see you Seraphine! Long time no see!" Seraphine just blinked.  
"So... What's going on E, explain slowly!" Seraphine said, back to her sarcastic voice. It was good to have normality!  
"Basically, I am the new Avatar of Death, personly you can call me 'Deacon E'!" E explained (sweatdrop from Sera). "Avatars in this world, though Death kept a record of them. Unfortunately he lost track after the 5th one. What a shame."_

_"Riiiight. That's cool. Keep going." Seraphine was interested in this tale, leaning on the jagged rock.  
"Death drew up contracts of each Avatar's hosts. Avatar of Hope was unknown. But now we think we know who that is..." E stated, he pointed directly at Seraphine. "Forsaken Avatar of Hope is residing within... Heh, but in order to resurrect you again, there's one thing I need- Can I borrow your Fuschia Bunny costume? I think I shall cosplay as one! Bunny E! If the Devourer senses you're a host, he will attack you. I need to ask the Avatar to leave, making you an immortal by taking pieces of mortality."  
"Sure" Seraphine stated, still in shock at this, "So I'm basically immortal now?" E nodded.  
"Now is the time, Avatar. You will feel a slight tingling sensation and will feel like a zombie for a few minutes."  
"WHAT?" Seraphine yelled before everything went black._

* * *

"AAAAARRGGGGGHHHH! Muffins!" screamed Seraphine as she was jolted back to life. Devi and everyone was shocked beyond belief at the noise as Seraphine rose from the 'ashes', full of energy. Immediately everyone remembered her again  
"Seraphine?! My LORE!" Robina yelled, "She's back from the DEEEAAAADD!" Everyone screamed at this as immediately something creepy happened. First Tetris noticed that a green-blue mist with the exact same appearance approached the Slayer. At the same time, another kind of mist formed and seperated from the body of the Slayer.

"EEEEEYYYAAAAHHH!" Devi shrieked, "A ghost from the dead! Another one!" Vixen was fascinated, "Wow!".  
"I wish I knew what occultic art had created this being" Trienna mused, "Definately advanced magic-"  
I am the Avatar of Hope which coexisted within the body of this Slayer since my creation. The 'Hope' being stated to the others, I have been commanded to leave this body to coinhabit another dimension by a certain person.

"Please let this not be real," Artix begged the Hope. "I don't want to squish you!" Hope smiled with a whisper, Of course not Artix Von Krieger. That other mist you see there? Ummm... How do I put it to you. That's the pure essence of the psyche, the mind of the Slayer, I have communicated to it and I shall leave so that Seraphine can continue to fight without my assistance.

"Why is this Hope person talking in high techno-babble? She's even more weirder than you Tek." glared Tetris. At once, Hope disappeared as someone murmured that it was too quick to even see. Seraphine stood up and the second mist vanished. That was a wierd experience that no body wanted to repeat.  
"RIGHT I'm going to really diss you off, Devourer. NOW IT'S REALLY PERSONAL!" Seraphine yelled as she held up her Aegis shield which was glowing a brighter green. If it couldn't get any more weirder, everyone was forced to do the polka.  
"And I thought that was weird, HELP ME, my legs are disobeying me!" commented Artix, kicking up his steely legs in rhythm. Only three people were still standing there: The Slayer, the Mage and the Devourer.  
"So... Seraphine, you came back- as predicted." the Devourer smiled toothily, "Came prepared... Selpuchure, bring FLUFFY!"  
"FLUFFY?!" Tetris gibbered, "Who's that person? Your pet?!"

Suddenly a huge skeleton dragon (wearing a pink dog's collar around his neck) roared as it landed. Devi screamed like the hell-hounds were after him... "Oh pleeeezzzz. That is extremely 'gay' by anyone's standards." Seraphine commented, "We have a male dragon wearing... PINK? We need a dragon-Slayer by the name of... Dragon-Tamer Fin-Schaets!" Suddenly a blur came swooping in... A tall lady wearing sparkling red and gold flashing armour. Her large jewels shone like diamonds and she looked way older than the Slayer, at least twenty years of age. She carried gigantic mace the size of a ham.

"You called my name? Dragon slaying is my game! Heheheh!" laughed D-T Larosin haughtily, leaning on her huge sword. ("Looks like to me, a crossover too many," Devi spoke to the audience, breaking the 4th wall) The Gailin smirked in glee.  
"You think that this -puuuuuuuny- Dragon Slayer can defeat the mighty power of the Fluffiness?!" roared the Devourer with laughter at this event. D-T Larosin sweatdropped before she charged kamikaze style at undead Fluffy.

"I learnt a trick of the trade! Chain Axe Massarce!" yelled the older Dragon-Slayer, plunging her axe into the bone. Fluffy reared up and tailed her... "Could this get any more paaaattttthheettttttic!" screeched D-T Larosin in rage, "Messed up my foilicles again! Ya gonna paaaaaayyy!" The dragonslayer screeched some more, enraged by the dragon.

"Oh boy," said Artix sarcastically, "I want to slay this Undead dwagon, but I can't do it." He started shaking... "Must resist inner-call telling me to slay... Whew, that's better. 5 percent life!" Everyone stared and stopped doing the polka (wow, that's a breather for sure). It was just then that Fluffy breathed a whole lot of Darkness element at the two fighters, but D-T Larosin swiped it away with a whirling weapon, if you looked reaaally closely (and squint) it was the Fortunato Axe.  
"Ha! Look at my axe spin." taunted D-T Larosin, "Your dwagon won't last long!" A gust of strong wind spread outwards.

"Grrzl? LAORRR!" Fluffy questioned before the wind hit the skeleton dragon and it shook in the breeze. The Gailin looked like it was cheering for Selpuchure's dragon. Unaffected by the axe's magic, the bony dragon eyed D-T Larosin. Then the beast grinned wickedly and gave her the eviiiil eye... The Slayer scoffed as she held bow of Ice arrows, "I shall aim fire!"  
"WTF?!" the Dragon-Tamer yelled as Fluffy tried to gnaw metal, "My expensive axe is not a bone for pet dragons!"  
Too bad Fluffy just wasn't listening. D-T Larosin looked like she was going to faint as she watched this.

"HA! You see, Seraphine, your choice of partner is ill suited... Better say your prayers." The Gailin announced.  
"NOT SO FAST!" Dragon-Tamer yelled, suddenly unsheathing a Dragon-blade from behind her back (Hammerspace).  
"In all actuality, law of physics disallow carrying a weapon larger than your own weight." Seraphine muttered.  
"SCREW THE LAW OF PHYSICS!" D-T Larosin announced, "I don't care for such petty things. Luckily I have backup...!"  
An Emperor penguin carrying a laser gun waddled out of nowhere, "Darstol, you know what to do... Shrink the dragon!" the Linus nodded and shot a laser at the Undead Fluffy.  
("Is it just me or is this seemingly epic battle... Kinda silly?" Tek wondered)  
"Seraphine, hand me your Vistrium Orb." ordered the Dragon-Tamer. Seraphine rolled her eyes and handed a shining Orb.  
"I better get repaid," Seraphine muttered as D-T Larosin asked an important question:  
"How do I look? Does my hair out of place?" Everyone's response was to fall anime style.  
"Gracious, the end of our world- and miss Shoes is concerned about appearances!" glared Vixen, she saw something dark and blurry on Larosin's neck. "What is that mark?"  
"Oh... That's my birthmark," The Dragon-Tamer shouted, "Had it since I was born in Orpesy Cove."

_"Merge!"_ D-T Larosin yelled as she commanded the Orb and the Dragonblade to melt together. When the light cleared, the new weapon formed. _"Shining Ultimate Despair,"_ The Dragonslayer yelled as the blade cleaved through ground like melted butter... Fluffy's response was to fall down and faint when hit by the blade, looking like a very large puppy-dog.  
"NO!" Selpuchure screamed at this, "I can't believe I got beat by a Dragon-slayer! Master, what do I do?"  
He looked like crybaby. The Dooom-Blade hummed and a voice snapped.  
"Master wants you to run! Pronto!" Selpuchure argued with the Blade.  
"Can't!" yelled the Doooomknight, crying a river.  
"Will!" screamed the Devourer, sick of this affair, "I am tired of your charade!"

* * *

"Is it just me- this Alvenos schizophrenic?" wondered Misako. the Selpuchure glared at her, "Uhhh... what are you looking?"  
"You won this round for now, pathetic Slayers." The Gailin muttered, watching Selpuchure running away - with the weird DOOOOM blade floating after him. What a crybaby, the semi-God thought in disgust.  
"Can't mess with the Slayer! I'm THE immortal Slayer of Hope." agreed Seraphine, "I have whole of Battleon behind my back!"  
_"Quick, let's awwwlll hide behind her!"_ Twig stated happily, the Slayer sweat-dropped. "Not literally," she added.

"I have one more surprise," grinned the Gailin, BOOOOM! "That was Pinball," he grinned, "with your own worst foe!".  
"Wha-" Seraphine yelled. A pin-ball machine came out of nowhere. "JUAN!" she roared as she saw who was playing it.  
"Dirty Lycan Slayer!" Juan yelled, "I should have known," He shook his fist in anger as the silver ball spun.  
"I have challenged Juan for the fate of Paladins," Gailin said wickedly, "He shall challenge me for pinball." (Oooh, said Tek.)  
"See if I care," Seraphine smiled, "I'm not interested in Juan. I'm currently immortal - and I kick yo ass,"  
"Plus we assisted each other," Dragon Tamer added proudly, "Isn't that coolskis?" The Devourer snickered.  
"You should, The Avatar of Hope is related to Juan, HA!" Silence for 1 sec...  
"WHAT?!" screamed both of them so loud it reached the sky. "We can't be related to that dirty Lycan/Paladin!"  
"oooh, twist plot," jeered Devi, "plottttt twist! PLOOOOOT TWIIIIST!"  
"You lie!" Paladin Juan said, having an idea. He only had three balls left, but if he tilt table, the Devourer's score would be even, "Want to have another go?" He gestured. The Devourer smiled, but to his rage his final ball went straight for the hole.  
"NOOAAAYYRRRGGGHHH!" yelled the Devourer, "I am unbeatable! We have a tiiiie." He glared at Juan, "Fair play."

Thus the world was saved from the Devourer... Sort of. Seraphine sighed relief. "Juan... I hope we can reconcile."  
"Fat chance of that," Juan said upon his sword, "Since when do I take orders from Dieties."  
"I think you mean Deities," corrected Seraphine with a sneer. "Nyahahaa!" she stuck her tongue out.  
"I did not ask for your opinion, O lousy Slayer." Paladin Juan yelled. "Being related to an IMMORTAL werewolf... Who you weree the host to a god-like being... and is annoying and witty. I hate the mere thought of that-!" He seethed.  
"ooooh, sibling rivalry." teased Twilly with a laugh. Tetris the Vampire mage couldn't resist a laugh at this.


	17. A Duke's Tale

The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage

_Author's Notes:_ Ehhh, I got kinda emotional when I was halfway through writing Officer Misako (chap 19) so I decided to write some funny random stuff to relieve the tension. :) And then I had a lightning strike - I hadn't let the descendants of Devi or Misako (Duke Whirlwind and Trinenna) tell their side of the story after all this time...?! Heehee, what a novel concept. So here it is! The 'mostly true' story of Duke Whirlwind and Trinenna the necromancer. Have fun readin'!  
PS: The other characters are listening to the tale too and they interrupt quite often with "this kind of writing".

* * *

_"Sanchos!_ Hello Yulgar, Duke formerly known as Whirlwind payin' for a rooooom. What? You want to hear my side o' the tale?! Really, I thought that things like bowlin' for sneevils went out years ago! That and Sunnyboy icecream. Why aren't you surprised I'm not speakin' in an Lore-Spaniard accent? That's a really interesting aspect of the _solasite_ story of m' life, _amigos._ And yeah, I know I am not as rich as I had originally stated out to be... And these flashy jewels I wear around my chest? That is a different story altogether? And this mask I wore around my face? That is my mask of sorrow, which I shall never ever ever ever reveal. Muhaahaha." gloated the Duke with humour as he paid Yulgar several large gold coins.  
"You're not rich or famous originally?!"interrupted Tetris with a sneer, "But all the other gals out there say you're famous outside LORE!" Twilly peered at the Duke.

"Errhhh... Just let me finish! Annnyyway, mah friends, gather' up and listen to a ravishing tale full of swashbuck'ng pirates and the likes and hauunted _darit_ castles! Ooooh, did I mention it had a crystal cave with the lady-bat? it alll started out when I was livin' in Dwarf moutains with my human parents in a frostly cauld mining villiage not far from Paxia, predictably..." Duke began cautiously as Yulgar stared at gold coins spilling from his money-bags. Yulgar grabbed some of the coins. The maulderer noticed and slammed his hand upon Yuglar's fist. CRRRAAASH! The innkeeper groaned in pain at this. "AAAARRRHHH!"  
_  
"Oh no, not another of those silly flashbacks."_ Twilly chattered as Tek leant on the banister, "We get enough of these memory things whenever Falerin comes to visits!" In the background, Devi had plugged his ears and was singing loudly as to avoid listening to his descendant's tale. It was annoying... and irritating!  
"Not interested. LAALALALALALAAAA...!" Devi yelled as he stuck his fingers in his ears continiously. Vixen now wished that the piolt would stop acting _so_ immature for his current age.

_Three years before the current AQ timeline...  
Believe it or not beringalos, I was born to a miner's family by the 'Alrino' name of... Well a generally embarassing first name if you mind... Eugeniro. Family tradition, no? I didn't mind so much the name, but I wanted to do bigger stuff like sometang amazing. I spent tall day learning how to polish jewels from my grandpapa, ol' Quterotos. And it took for'eva! Then we moved onto the hardee stuff - Rock shatterin'. It's not as easy as it looks, you needa fists of coconuts and the strength ta match. It didn't help that I was handed a tiny_ _pickaxe the size of my tween' fingers... The first weeks of jewel craftin' was haaarrrd-  
_  
"You mean three fingers?" interrupted Seraphine boredly. The Duke looked confused, "I bet you mean three."  
"Nay, I meant tween," Duke Whirlwind stated with a dazzling grin, "Itsa cute word, no?"  
_  
Anyway, I was going to say, it waas HAAAARD. I dropped the wrock and it shattered into a billion lil pieces. I picked it up  
with my cool kettle tongs and I had ta spend the next day tending my wounds cause the rock wouldn't stay 'till, it was even worse when I dropped that same rock on my toes. HANCHOS! Ouchies, that was the time I leant an interesting moral: Never pick up rocks with a wooden tong. Anyway I moved onto mine-picking half year later - soo sweaty - and learnt to yodel in the mines - YAAAAHHOOOO...! You know, like the search engine. I fetched a big price for jewels as large as Sneaks in Dwalf Mountain markets but noone wanna buy my wares?! That was until I figured out that they weren't jewels, they were fossilised pieces of Ruby Golems...! I spent a full week trying ta return those jewels back to their teerrritory-  
_"Ruby Golems?!" Tetris yelled excitedly, "How did you figure that out?" The Duke looked smart, "Come ON?" Eugeniro winked. "I'll tell you the secret, look one between the eyes and poke it with a good sharpish stick, amigos!"  
_  
Okaaay. Now, where was I up to. It wasn't until several week later that everything changed for mah, I was waltzing as usual wishing that I had another gold coin to my name when I saw this weird dude. He was wearing a white coat and had white hair like a ebil old man and everything, he even had a goatee... And whizzed round in the air using a Jajion device. Naturally, I was like "Hiya there eeebil dude." Then he introduced himself as the Technomancer, Voltabolt the 25th. Then he told me to get off his lawn... But I didn't.  
"You want unimaginable power?! You want success?" this Voltabolt guy kept asking silly ol' me. Then he narrowed his eyes, "You want... FAME?" I shook mah silly head eagerly. "Then you neeed to go to this location!" He showed me a treasure map...! WITH A HUGE X shape in the middle. The location was Orpesy Cove...! Dollar signs went off in my eyes.  
_"OH come on, Duke. You're not silly enough to fall for that, surely." laughed Tek but the Duke nodded his head and answered her question. "I was silly back then, what else would I be?"

_I said goodbye to my parents and left Dwarfhold mountains for a long time. I travelled for days, over dales and everything. Naturally I had no idea where Orpesy cave was, so I kept asking everyone I met... AND ASKING, cause I lost the map. It was then that I found it. Or so I thought. Instead I came across.. The Thursday Mansion in Amytville! It was creeeepy Iwiaro! I met a gothic girl (Thursday) outside the house, but I thought she was weird. She said she could help me if I found her red pendant... Pendant?! It was sooooo hard to find it - I wasted two hours of mah life finding the tiny thing! The pay wasn't good too. I was nearly eaten by a snappy carnivorous flower called Aburey Two - then got chased by a bitey, bitey Lycan gaurd called Lon...! To mah relief, she showed me the way out. Too bad it was the WRONG direction, skejidht!  
_"So where did you end up next?" Trinenna grinned.  
_HMMM. Lets just say I ended up in 'two tickets to paradise'. Notu just kidding! I just ended up involved in a Undead Heist at Oakslore Keeps, but somehow... I had enought, so I go back, but... Pirates stopped me! No kidding. I ended up listening to The Lamaa Song as they tried to take all my valuables, fortunately I just gave them a bag full of mined rocks! Another time, I was spelunking in a cave and a human bat came in and I nearly freaaaaked out!_

_The bat-creature told me not to worry - "I'm only after a Vistrium Orb". Luckily I always carry a spare orb around. In return, there was a secreeet fortress where treasures has been stored. HA, do you think I'm REALLY going to tell you guys the location? I got there by accident, I was soooo clumsy I kept tumblin' down the mine - 12 times.  
"AAAAHH" I kept screaming and screaaaaming, until I stopped. The castley underground I saw was giagantic! I was like 'Splendifrus!"_

_The fortress had these weird computers, knight statues and gold furnituture, and good ol' emblems. Oh, and a coffee machine... No one had lived here for several years, dust and cobwebs were on everything and it looked mouldy. Ewww. I saw a sign saying 'Rajak Isle Castle'. Just then I heard a rattle and something erupted from the floor... It was a ghastly thing! I freaaaaked out anrrhit and ran to another room! I panted and ran and ran and ran and ran awwwwaaay-_

"A monster," interceded Yulgar, "Interesting. You sure you're not a scaredly Ice cat?"  
_Of course not, I'm brave like my name indicates! My eyes bugged out. HERE was enough items and golden treasure to last me several lifetimes. I sneaked some in my secret bottomless satchel Adventurers always carried. But then I stopped._

I saw a locked chest and using my lock'picking skills I opened it. It contained nothing but a maroon 'Phantom of the Opera' mask. "Ow! curious," I observed, "Should I try it on?" As soon as I put it on... I changed. NOT physically, but still I changed.  
I became more sexy and more alluring in appearance, I grew more muscles and was charming! I knew how to speak several alien languages and LORE-spaniard. A risk well worth taking, Wereiro!

As a side effect - I involuntarily speak now like that. But smarts didn't change! But still it was my secret sorrow, because I could never go back to that simple life I led when I was a miner... From then on I was Duke Whirlwind, the ravishing-! As soon as I walked out of that cave, girls were onto me like glue. It was as if I cast a spell on them. My fame grew and I learnt trades. I don't want to bore you, but a year later, I was walking in Paxia and suddenly, I knocked into someone. It was a cynical Necromancer, wearing full black with silver trinklets and charms around her wrists. She said that she heard of me, but wasn't interested in trading goods.

"You mentioned me," quirked Trinenna as Duke finished his epic tale. "Now, shall I take up my doom recount?!"  
"...LAALALALAALA-" continued Devi until the Necromancer slapped him on the face.  
"You can stop singing now." Trinenna stated blankly, "Now it's time for my gloomy tale... Muhahaha."


	18. The 'Mecrodity' of Devi Whirl

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

_"ALL HAIL THE GREAT DRAGON AVATAR! yoaaaarrrreeee! Lwwweeeeoooorrr! Hana, hana, kishiane!" chanted the Dracomancers as they stood in a circle upon the weeping rock of the Dragon's cleft. Shelia, Cyrus's sister was amongst them as they danced the weird sliding dance of their culture, their wingtips outspread and touching the tips.  
"The dragon of desparing Chaos, the dragon of obtaining Order, and now! The dragon of ultimate BALANCE!" they droned monotone, as suddenly two 'Adventurers' leapt up. The party was stopped and the three dragon-people looked confused. In the name of Arkiloth. "Stop this party! We're gatecrashin' tha cosplaying convention and we don't are about no Avatar!" they all screamed. Nobody was confused at their talk, but Sheila looked furious at this. The Dracomancer's sister flew after mistaking them for Dragonslayers._

"WATCH YOUR GRAMMAR!" she shouted as immediately she punched the 'ground' with her fist. The impact shattered and the twodraco-slayers found themselves a hundred metres in the air. They vanished into the distance, with a dinging sound.  
"WE'RE BLASTING OFF AGAAAAIIIIN!! Galaaaaannnnooottthhh!" The twosome screeched. Cyrus looked worried.  
"Woah, Shelia babe! That's a nice Earth-Breaker move! Think they're be okay?" he chuckled. Shelia looked 'naughty' for a minute.  
"That is if... They land on their feet. Cats have nine lives." Shelia winked. The 'Dragonslayers' weren't cats! Cyrus sweatdropped.

* * *

"Whatever!" Paladin Juan frowned as he was polishing his axe very fast, "Even if that Devourer stated we're kinda related, I won't ever believe him! Heck, we don't even have tha same hair colour and the likes. And-" He pointed towards Tetris, "WHY in the name of all Grogs did you travel with this mangly fellow?! Huh. I shall never understand the likes of your kind." The cocky Paladin blew his red hair out of his eyes. Tetris heard the comment. The idiotic mage approached Juan with a kipper in his shoe. His fangs were tight as the mage squinted. Out of nowhere a tumbleweed appeared (like in a cowboy movie).

"Why you say that? That's naught thary nice." Tetris mocked, "You should know, goody Seraphine and moi (meaning me) goes a long way back. We don't even know you, or who you side with or even what you intends! Now back off before I shove this cold kips down your pants." (The longest speech poor Tetris had ever made!) The mage held up a brown fish which flop.  
"Us Paladins don't have pants." Juan laughed hard at this, "We have metal undies." Tetris blinked dimwittedly, letting it sink in for full ten minutes. Vampires don't have long attention spans.

After ten mins of this, Tetris said confusely, "I think you mean Long Johns. Yayness. Now, where's the nearest virgin-" Juan giggled at this. "What's soooo funny?" Tetris asked in a bitter tone across the counter, "I don't see the joke. What was?" The mage looked pathetic. Seraphine  
"Virgins. How appropiate. The sounds of it you sound like you're ordering a Bloody Mary?" Juan laughed. Tetris joined in, but in the town of Krovesport, it was really hard not to stare at anything. Especially at THAT. Tetris was eying a meal once again and he grinned. Free meals, alright he was a daywalker, but he could... snag a virgin while the Slayer wasn't-  
"Don't even think of that." Seraphine interrupted, at that Tetris sulked some more. All that excitement made a vamp hungry! Tetris cast a glance at Juan, it sure was quiet here without the Solunians! The threesome were elsewhere - exploring some silly ol' Vamprook Sprye (where Leeeroy Jenkins lived) At this point he 'snoozed' off.

* * *

"So why are we here at Dragonbane?!" said an annoyed Vixen, glaring at our fave Martin, "Instead of visiting a Leeroy?" Misako crossed her arms and glared at Devi, wondering same reason... Devi sweatdropped as he grinned like a comic...  
"Sick of staying in this timeline, missin' the action back home. So we gonna get some crystalised dragon-fire...! And I know just the Alvenos to get some fresh flamin' dragon-fire! Major horse-power! Yehaa. Da man, Galanoth...! So that visit was a fabrication so that Seraphine won't know of no plans of mine." Devi bragged. (Learning from ol' Tetris, there). All on a huge cliff overlooking Weeping Dragon's cliff... Stunned silence. The two stared at this, 'Oh boy,' muttered Vixen in her mecha.  
"Then why did you bring Sir Warlic along, silly Devlin?" asked Misako, looking at Mage Warlic who stared.

"So we can get magic happenin', need some crystalisation, time for some action. Action packed holographic movieeeees..." Devi sang terribly. (everyone fell anime style at this once again. Devi sure needed singing lessons!)  
"Riiight. Any need to bring me along then?!" yelled another voice, a yellow Twig tied up on the red mecha.  
"This is your just desserts for icing me." Devi laughed with cheek at poor Twiggy. "Twiggly wiggly Twig..."  
"Devi's misbehaving really really badly," admitted Misako aside to Vixen, "And that aint no joke." Tek agreed, not having anything to say otherwise as she slogged upwards the hill for now.

"AAARRRHH!" suddenly TWO people fell from the sky, just as Warlic looked up. They both landed on a soft surface...  
"My name Thagalon... Aieee! Wakanouuiiii! A huuuuuge monster! Dwagon." screamed one of the people, looking flustered at their 'arrival'. Hyperion Tek who transformed underneath the little girl, used her superpowers. Everyone sweatdropped at this.  
"Has to be the most random event we've seen," commented Misako. It was then that someone spoke.  
"The what?" blundered Warlic, confused at incidents of the falling people in the daytime (lol). Confused, the silly mage lept onto the first thing he pulled- it wasn't what he expected. "Where did you come from?" The girl blinked.

"A message for Galanoth!" squeaked the girl Adventurer, imitating Twig's voice. That annoyed Devi even more.  
"Random, can we move on with this?" smiled Devi, "We need to find Galanoth and get some dragon-fire." The man lifted his head out of the large crater, it was... Everyone did another anime fall at this new arrival. This was chaos, utter chaos for the whole group.  
"LEEEEEEERRRRRROOOOOOOYYYY JEEEENNNKKKIIIINS!" screeched the man, introducing himself, everyone clasped their hands to their ears. "Nice to meet you! We have a message for the great Dragonbane Galanoth...!"

Tek looked erked (If she could even call that). 'Sorry, I'm used to shouting random catchphrases!' Leeroy said before sticking out a glad hand, "Stick 'em here pardner!" All the group- Misako, Devi, Vixen, Archmage Warlic, Twig, Superheroine Hyperion-Tek and little Thagalon- just sweatdropped again. This was unexpected.  
"We... weren't expecting you two to appear," admitted Vixen happily, siding up with the man. Leeroy looked miffed.  
"I didn't ask for this," Leeroy commented, just then Hyperion-Tek realised something of importance...

"Where's Archmage Warlic?" Tek said, looking around in confusion. Leeroy looked like a fish just slapped him in the face. Devi meanwhile was arguing with Vixen once again, with one of their oh-so-famous feuds. They always argued in their spare time.  
"We're not lost, we're just geographically challenged...! The contours of the land match with our mountain landscapes which overlap the famous Wyvern territories." He yelled out as Vixen stared at the weird words Devi was speaking.

"Well, oh so much for your genius. Like your weird, silly plans ever GETS us anywhere. Now that a Leeroy is cross with us and Warlic's abandoned us!" Vixen pointed out, "So we're pratically lost in this desert, due to your ideas?" Everyone stared.  
"I was hoping ya wouldn't say that to da Martin," Devi groaned, "Now you're in for it..." Twig laughed at his teaser.  
"Uhhh... Everyone?" Misako pointed out suddenly, "Like we have unexpected company..." Suddenly, the sky turned dark with beating of blue Wyvern wings, with Keliare at the fore! "Any famous last words?"  
"You just had to go off and say that, didn't you, Koko?! Now we're BBQ Wveryn meat!" glared Devi. Misako cringed as the small girl Thagalon spoke: "Uh... Technically, Wveryns aren't fire breathing. They're poisionous dragon-birds with a mean green attitude... Plus they peck at anything shiny and metallic in large flocks." Devi paled at this info.  
"Don't tell me this is a spoof of that classic holo-movie _The Birds!"_

"So, it's awfully quiet here, don'tcha think Sera?" commented Tetris, yawning as he 'left' the Inn with the Slayer. "There's not enough guff with the 'steal from the poor' Krovesport rogues. With exceptions to 'Val' gal of course." the dumb mage winked cheerfully as he whistled a tune from Pirates of Sixpence. Juan cast a shifty look towards Tetris. He was liking this idiot less and less as time went on. As he wondered, the young Paladin sneered at the vampire. Seraphine happened to notice.  
"So, how are things, Juan?" glared Seraphine with oniminous tones, she didn't wanna admit to Juan. That she 'didn't like him' would be a bit of understatement - for her anyway! Juan smiled. Tetris didn't like this at all.

"For starters, I just want to make up for what I said earlier. Sera, you rock. Secondly, you need to get rid of this plain ol' sucker! It's pure baaaad for your rep as a Slayer of Undead creatures." pointed Juan cheerfully. (Poor Tetris bared his yellow fangs at that, eyes glowing red and claws unsheathed) He laughed long and hard.  
"Say that again and you get punted to the Aeris battledome," muttered Tetris under his breathe. Juan heard that comment...  
"Is that a challenge, Sucker?!" hollered Juan, swinging his golden axe. He looked like cinema movie-star at that time.

"Yeah, that's a challenge..." Tetris yelled out loud, Seraphine grinned at that. "What's so twisted, Sera?" he asked aside.  
"Finally, Tetris. You show Juan some of your hardcore spunk. I likes a guy with that sorta attitude." Seraphine smiled. ("Wait - Are you supporting him? I'm your close kin." Juan was annoyed at this!) At this Tetris made an ultra weird move! He flipped backwards before running right up to the Slayer. He squished his little face up against Seraphine, before pressing his hand against hers. It was more than weird, it was out of the Twilight Zone.

"Icecream truck!" The redhead yelled with emotion. Everyone sweatdropped. "No, really... Oright, I was kidding,"  
Juan insisted. Slayer Seraphine stared at this even more. "Great." the Lycan-girl said humourless, "I get a weird Paladin joker as a cousin... No comment," Tetris knocked the goggles of Juan's reddish head. Juan saw something in the hedge rustle... Made a dramatic stance, distracting our favourite mage. "Silence, you fowl cretin. Avust the decent sucker is here."  
"What you saying?" Tetris grinned, "Jules, talkst like thou art an ancient Loremaster?" Juan facefault.

Suddenly something clawed its way out of the bushes,- "WRRAAAAAHHH!" It screamed with a warcry as it revealed itself to the terrified three. "AAAARRRRRHHHH!" screamed the Slayer and the Paladin as they prepared to battle. The 'enemy' had dark bat-like wings curled up, dark lashes and a nice figure that put any paprazzi out of business. She had stripes of red upon the face. Seraphine stared. Juan stared. Even Tetris stared, it was not who he expected!

"Aleysia, my dear gal!" begged Tetris, "You didn't hear that small chat to Seraphine did you?" Female vampire with shockin' mauve plaited hair sniggered. The vampire scout put her fingers to her silent sacchurine lips, Alyesia still said nothing. This relieved Tetris, but then he saw a flash of bronze hilt. Flapping her bat-like wings - Aleysia had a wild Chesire's cat look about her, she looked feral like a wildcat. The scout licked the blade of the hilt _(Clearly she never heard of hygiene,_ Tetris noted).  
"Ballyhoo's deed- what da heck you plan, Aleysia?" Juan yelled out, before Seraphine realised something.  
"Juan... Let me get this straight. You KNOW her?" Seraphine blinked, her new 'cousin' must know a lot of people! The young Paladin blinked, before slapping his own face in anger. _(Damn IITTTT!_ Juan thought, _Now my 'cousin' knows my secret_.)

Before Tetris could react, scout Aleysia took action. Raising the dagger, she took aim and tossed the knife right at Seraphine... Juan After a full five minutes, Tetris realised what had happened between then and now. "RRRAAAAAHHHH!! You touched Seraphine," roared the angered vamp at the scout. The mage pounced right at Aleysia, growling like a tiger and his fingernails extended to 4 cms long (what the). Before anyone could do anything, Aleysia screeched and launched into the sky like a rocket - taking Tetris with her. It wasn't easy to hang onto 4000 m of pure speed...!

"I'll hang onto heeeerrrr," promised Tetris, turning into a bat-like version of himself to Juan's surprise, he was clawing at Aleysia ferociously as she headed towards Safira's castle. The scout looked put off... :P  
"..." Juan ran towards Seraphine who now gagged, looking at the dagger with disgust. Surprisingly (or not) Seraphine was still alive. She was still immortal. With a wet slide, Juan pulled the blade out of her chest and the wound healed anew...  
"Wow," Juan yelled, "oohhh. The blood... Gaaaakk. I haaaaattttee bloood!" screamed the Paladin. He swooned with fear.  
"YOU should been more supportive. There's no time for phobias, Juan." noted the Slayer, her hair raised with anger.  
"YOU should have been slaying Undead." Juan added, "Not hanging around with that mangly excuse for a mage!"  
"Is not!" retorted Seraphine, "You just hanging around," Seraphine's eyes glowed.  
"You're also not doing your job," Juan pointed out, "What you do all day?! Dig up old bones?"

* * *

"Calm down," reasoned Devi using reverse psychology on himself! "They're not dragons, they're harmless, gentle non-robotic birds that LOOK like dragons!" Everyone facefaulted. "Plus, they might screech, but they're oh so perfectly-" At this a Wyvern dove down onto Devi's mecha like a bomber and pecked rapidly. "HEY! Firking dragon bird!" yelled the Martin, "Go peck something your own size!" It now acted like a woodpecker. _RrrRRRRrrrRRRTTttTTTtt!_ He swatted the monster, but it returned - bringing three more. "Oh (censored)!" yelled Devi, lying on the desert plain.

"Ever considered asking US to help?! Geez," said Leeroy happily, twacking the many Wyverns like a Whack-A-Mole contest, "Cheese burgers and ragmuffins!" The adventurer yelled. Everyone sweatdropped at the scene! It looked like a horror film. Misako (or rather her mecha) was busy hiding behind a rock while a tied Twig hopped on one leg.  
"Go fishes go!" squeaked Twiggy happily, with pom-pom balls, "Fwishes all rawk!" The chubby yellow 'mouse' dodged. Suddenly, one of the Wyverns wheeled around, squawking as Keliare charged straight at them. "WACE?!"  
As Devi's mecha stepped back from Wyverns he never noticed a huge hole in the ground that mysteriously appeared...

* * *

"Wha-?!" exclaimed Vixen as the air shimmered in front of her, she was starting to feel wary of whoever was going to appear in front of her, but she kept calm even as another person stepped in front of her. The stranger had two differently coloured irises, one of which was silver, another of which was blue as the ocean. "What in kelf is going on?!" she screamed in fright, but the stranger caught her. "... Don't tell me you're from the far distant future or whatever." She noticed the staff the stranger was holding in her hand, it sparkled in the breeze. It looked familiar.  
"I should have expected this from you, still the same no matter when I see you," sighed the stranger, "Vincor? Don't question how I can apparently materialise in two or time-lines at once, too complicated for me to tell you. You could call me 'Mel' if you like. It's not as if the Queen's gonna rue me for this time-loop paradox, but you probably won't believe any of what I'm going to tell you. Anyway... I have a message for your friends." Vixen's face changed, this person whoever she was, seemed knowledgeable and yet there was an urgency to the matter that forced her to listen. The cloak fluttered behind the person, it seemed as though she was rushing a bit in her speech.

There was a familiar look to Mel, but Vixen ignored this and pushed it aside in her curiosity, probably a strange coincidence. The cloak the figure wore flapped in the breeze, the stranger's long hair seemed unaffected by the climate, which was very strange in itself. There was a sad look to the lady.  
"Gah, oh right..." chuckled Vixen, having gotten over her fright of the person, "So what's so urgent? Why don't you just tell them yourself?" Mel looked shocked at the fact. "Did I just say something wrong? Which friends in particular do you want me to tell?" Vixen asked, Mel shook her head seeming aloof. Something similar to the guestures made. "So are you a Time-Lord? Or a deity of some kind?" Vixen chuckled. Mel smiled, but didn't say anything. Vixen guessed that Mel liked her jokes. _Whoever this person was..._ Vixen wondered, but she kept waiting.

"Not at all, it's not as it seems." muttered Mel solemnly, covering part of her face with her hood. "You remind me of someone I know." Vixen retorted, Mel looked mortified but retained her calmness, "How did you get that scar? Did you hurt yourself?" asked the Spanish lady in curiousity.  
"That is not for you to know, this information is something no Solunian ought to know. I have two things to ask in favour: Can you get Mako to collect some (and I'll be very specific at this) Crystallised Dragon Breath crystals from this valley? It will come in useful later, Vincor. I might use it to 'enhance' a few weapons in the future." Vixen winced at this, the name again. "You might be confused now, but this info is important for me."  
"Alright, anything to assist you," said the Spanish girl cheerfully, "Are you sure you don't need any further help, Mel?" Mel shook her head again.  
"I just want to tell you that... Your friends love you more than you'll ever know, they'll be grateful if you support them."

* * *

Clawing and tearing, Tetris STILL couldn't prevent the Vampire scout from reaching her destination. Tossing off the mage with an echoing roar, Aleysia shook off him. Striding to the castle steps, she just glanced at Tetris with a snigger before the 'moat' slid its waters by itself. Tetris attempted to frantically climb the drawbridge, but fell into the receeding red water...  
"Safira, my Majesty." Aleysia called the regal heir, "I have confirmed that the Slayer and Tetris has done the most heinious crime to our pure bloodline... They have interacted!" Safiria traced the silver cup on her chair-lounge (she was bored).  
"Have you anything to confirm this?" Aleysia did a fall of exaspration. The vampiresses stared at each other.

"YES! When I tried to slay the Lycan Slayer, Tetris reacted by restraining me from my task. He screamed that he 'forbid' me, a fellow vampire, from touching HIS dearest Seraphine. Highly unusual for our kind to act this way towards another. But I have failed, somehow she still LIVES."  
"Immortality? How dare that Lycan attain arts of undying! Influencing our newest generation to rebel against our current ways. Defeating the godlike Devourer on her own. There's no telling what she's capable of!" Safiria imagined (with a shudder) Lycans and Vampires joining hands in peace. Safiria's screams were soooo loud that every vampire in Dakovia flocked to her side, demanding orders.

"Take up arms against Werepyres and werekind, fellow kin - this means... CIVIL WAR! And we won't stop there. We must avenge departed Nightbane. Questions?" General Grimweld held up his hand (as Worsh shuddered in the background),  
"Can I please go to the bathroom? I might need to take a little whizz over here." Embarrased silence.  
"NO! Vampires don't need ettiqué!"Safiria yelled, "Plus, we're to be undead, it would ruin our reputation."


	19. Good Were Cunning

**The Rogue, the Slayer and the Mage**

**Chapter XIV: Good Were Cunning.  
**Darkovian War Arc (part 1 of 4)

**Author's Notes: **(Not finished, this is becoming quite a habit with me... mainly because I have to study) Well, I decided to switch to 'serious mode' once again for this chapter, but this will only be temporary. Oh, this will contain a lot of ancient folklore kind of traditions and random surprises! The crazy frog song is the most annoying thing I ever heard.

They say bad news travels fast. Well, in Darkovia, terrible news travels even faster. Within the space of just _two weeks,_ every subterranian-creature in the forsaken woods knew of Tetris's betrayal and word spread even more out... Except for a few isolated people and some dragons that is. Keliare the Ninja-Cat stirred after night fell. Looking upon the vast grey terrain that stretched towards Alpha Alphonse's lair, she spotted grey figures running to and fro. They looked anguished about something and they kept touching the tops of their furry little heads.

It seemed as though they were distressed to her eyes. Flicking back an annoying sneak with her claws, Keliare remembered the times when Cyrus congratulated her on a well-earned flight around the area, but it seemed to her that the very thought was fading more each night, waning with passing time. Sometimes she was scared at the prospect that she would lose her identify altogether, the sense of who she truly was before the day it began. Now that phase was over, she imprisoned by the Queen until it commanded her to fly out and scout (She refused to call Safiria a she, seeing it as a creature of the night). _Sharp claws. Night black._ she noted, her eyes gleamed with worry. The Queen disallowed her dragon-form for now.

So Keliare often clung to each second with total dread, hoping that Safiria's 'victory' over her would be called off soon. And hopefuly, the contract with Death would be terminated. She tried to recall soaring through the air, as she once did, on dragon's wings. All she now felt was a gnawing black emptiness. _This can't be._ The small feline squeaked with terror at this.  
The former rogue stared at her stubby paws, trying to remember sleek smooth touch of steel and how warm it felt against her palms. Nothing. Oh, and she remembered the day she rescued a Boog with an air-Guitar. Oh how she longed for friends.  
As the week passed the annoying nightmare became even worse, more detailed and every time she awoke, the poor Rogue awondered whether if it was truly the reality. Or a dream. Or a dream within a dream. But still, she persisted.

How Keliare managed each night (without going insane) was a wonder. Until one week later... The Queen told her.  
"What have we here." yelled Safiria in surprise at their prisoner, a bedridden Worsh stared out from his captivity. General Grimweld stared tensively, poking the 'worst pilot' hard with a claw. Worsh just gasped and pushed his back against the cell.  
"Is he to remain here?" Grimweld sniggered, "He used to be under the caring ward of Nightbane... Until recently."  
Safiria grinned, already she was starting to have plans for this Worsh-thing. Keliare watched with sappy emotions as Worsh shrank back from Miss Vampire Queen. Then Keliare leapt, swooping low against the prison ceiling and the wings unfolded.

"Shall I do the honours of keeping Worsh here?" she asked. Safiria nodded eagerly, dragon body-guards would be ideal.  
"Wace? Why ARE you all pale?! Why are you here with me?? Lorithia!" yelped Worsh. The vampires teased him.  
"Nyah, nyah! That's for you to know," said Grimweld in sheer delight, "and for US to find out! Keliare shall keep watch!" Smiles widened, "Keep you in the highest Darkovian mountain in the highest dungeon, like in the Shrek movie." Worsh binked. He didn't like this idea at all. Then he heard something that made his 'blood run cold':  
"Oh yeah - We listen to the 'Crazy Frog' song all night long!" said another, putting in an pesky torturous voice: "DinglingdiinlinglinlingDOOOOONdijeleleleeleee." They say in Darkovia, no one can hear you scream...  
Obliviously, they never heard Worsh cry (like a girl).

* * *

SMASH! A cup shattered across the floor as Juan picked it up briskly, wiping on it with a damp cloth. Being a trainee Paladin, he had the habit of polishing anything hard that he came across... Including boots, shoes and people's noses. Humming a girly song which sounded VERY familiar, Juan wiped his goggles as he stared at the Mage and sneered. That vampire was a competitor, and he couldn't allow it! Well, how about mentioning the 'cousin', shouldn't that raise a few hackles from him? No, he'll just think of a bad pun. A giggle escaped his lips as the less smart mage looked up. "Tetris, ol' buddy pal! Had a few Blood Marys along this way? What about another round? I'll shout for more!" he offered gleefully. The vampire clearly hadn't drank for over three weeks and was trying to scrape his fingers across the bar-table.

"Whaddyawant Juan?" asked Tetris with a deep voice, less understandable from the accent. Maybe it was time to back away... Slowly. Juan just stared at the words. Mages were weird, but the undead were WEIRDER. Tossed another glass. SMASH! Tetris just watched blankly. Outside, a wind-wracked sign creaked as lightning flashed.  
"That's an glass oft Tomatoc Klause ya wasted!" said innskeeper Boog, shaking his head. The green giant threw in the towel... At Juan. The red haired suddenly found himself in _The Attack of the Fluffy Inn's Towel!_ It messed up his goggles.  
"Hey, it wasn't my fault," Juan pointed out, pointing to Tetris. Tetris shrugged, fangs glinting.

They heard a high-pitched growl which sent them scurrying up the nearest staircase. Juan was shocked. It was his 'dirty Lycan cousin' - she didn't look too pleased... Clearly, was it full moon fever or what? The Paladin was nervous now.  
"RRRRRRR...! Juan. How many times didihavetotellyou you don't put your freakin' Axe at the Inn?" Seraphine said 'quietly'.  
Now THAT was an understatement! Juan noticed that it was 'that time of the month.' And now this phase was worse.  
Boog looked scared of the Slayer as she glared. "One large Cowchicken steak... rare." The green giant stared.  
"Sorry, we huaff roan out a few minutes ago." Slurred speech. Banewaer just panted, his tongue sticking out.  
Drumming her fingers really fast on the table, the Slayer looked irritated... and impatient, if she didn't calm down soon - the change would begin. And it wouldn't be pretty.

DING DONG! Juan ran towards the doorknob and turned the handle. Inviting in whoever it was. It was Robina.  
"Hey there," said Robina cheerfully, "I've brought along my trio of MARRIED women." Juan's jaw hit the ground, when she realised her grammar mistake. "Juan, I meant merry women." she laughed.  
Tetris's eyes looked up. Finally, someone who would be easy pickings. _This is going to be easy, heheheheh!_  
"Hangin' there rockin' babe." he 'complimented' a female figure. Too bad this idea went bad.  
The 'female' turned out to be a long haired page boy who was barely 14! Muhahahaha!

Butler Gerald (of Robina's trio) looked offended. "I am not your babe," the male pointed out. The mage thought of a way to distract Robina's friends - until one of them threw a tong. That left his face flat like a pancake.  
"YEOW! tha' hits mah farce! Mah farce!" wailed the vampire mage. Gerald whistled innocently when Robina looked.  
"Serves you right," said the male page, saluting Tetris's scowl, "Don't mess with da Gerald!"  
"You got that from Zohan," muttered Tetris, Gerald looked confused at that, "Never mind." Tetris smiled smartly.  
Having access to _the Great one_ could be handy after all!

Suddenly, a figure darkened the doorway! It was a huge shadow that stretched across the room. The door turned really really slowly. And a figure stepped in. Everyone except Tetris gasped. It was another aristocrat, except he had _claws._  
"Blake Hurst," said Robina in dead pan as everyone else went 'WTF?!' Well, except for the Slayer, just stared daggers.  
"I say," Blake Hurst looked rather fizzed off. he scratched his head in a lazy manner like a mongrel, "A vampire in the middle of Grameor, can't say that's unusual." Blake glanced at Juan. He grinned with a weird puppyish look. Juan groan.  
"I have business with you, Tetris." Blake said quietly, "Time to take the trash out." At this he got a huge fishing rod- and literally reeled in the prize catch. "HEY! That's my poncho!" Tetris screeched. Blake ignored him.  
"Can I have a word with you?! Blake!!" yelled Seraphine. Valencia and Robina gave each other facefaults.  
"Yeah, whatever." Blake shrugged, "Got any flea collars?" The Slayer looked scared at this. "... you can borrow it later."

As Blake dragged Tetris (and Seraphine) towards outside a wall, Valencia crept outside. Robina did too.  
"We're gonna get to the bottom of this!" whispered Valencia LOUDLY. Tek looked excited as her Farbit said SAY!  
"ooooh, can I join too? We can be a trio! YAYYAYAYAYYAY Uno, Dos, Tres!" Tek yelled, hopping. Valencia shrugged.  
"You wish!" Valencia sweatdropped, "We're just here for favours! Not love-dovey ones." she yelled, looking at Robina.

* * *

"Whelp Seraphine," accused Blake Hurst, "You are in major trouble. Doggy running round?! Carvoting round with Paladins! Mixing scents around and overall, that behavior puts our Faluno clan to shame!" Seraphine growled, "I don't know why."  
At this the three peeping-toms' eyes bugged out. Robina looked strangely at rogue Valencia, who looked... shocked.  
"The Slayer, owning a doggy." Robina stated, "Well, that's new! never knew Banewaer runs around town."  
"And fleas, her pet wolf has fleas!" shuddered Valencia, "Thank goodness - washed before I touch backpack."

Tek felt like shaking some sense into the two. She COULDN'T believe how 'dense' they were.  
"Wace. Want me to spell it out for you?! She's Xanatolv." Tek yelled. The two looked confused.  
"Xanatolv? How you pronounce?" Robina say brightly, "Xan-no-toff." Tek said 'No! You can't even say.'  
"Well, you try it. Werewolf. Just say it." Valencia hissed. Tek stared before saying her best accent.  
"Wario-WHUFF. Ruff!" Tek yelled. Valencia just slapped her head in stress... The bush they were behind rustled.  
"Tetris!" Blake growled, "I got a present for you." Tetris was eager... Until Blake dumped a 1 km dog-leash around his neck.  
"WHAT?? I was BORN FREE! _As free as the wind blows- as freeeeeeeeee -!"_ Tetris yelled as Blake kicked him right into the Darkovia woods. Seraphine just shook her head and screamed at the man to stop his antics.

The Blake just loped into the woods without word, dragging the Slayer along. The three screamed at this idea.  
"Oh bother, it looks like we have to follow them," muttered Valencia as sulking at Tetris's joke. "LET'S GO GIRLS!"  
"Oeykens," corrected Tek brightly, "That's the way to say it! lalalalala. On the good starship lollipop-"  
"I said lets go!" roared Valencia. Everyone fainted at hearing this, Robina just fell in shock. "It's a good thing daddy Trey Surehunter's not here to see this. He would think, _Boy it's shame mah daughter's not a leader!"_

* * *

_At Faluno Clan villiage...  
_Valencia looked at the earthly huts of the clan. Children (and toddlers) were running around on all fours as the adults and whelps worked on 'decorating' their lairs and dens. They looked normal enough. Child laughed happily and played fetch with the others. Some of the adult Lycans wore a fang talisman upon their necks. Some were scruffy like they rolled in mud. One child scampered over to bushes, curiously sniffling. He had a small ball in his mouth and looked weirdly at them...  
"Wow, it looks normal as villiage to me. Nothing to worry about!" Tek waved her hands. The cute toddler cocked his head.  
"Hey there little fella," Valencia picked the boy up. Startled, the child growled a little. _"Alpha! Two-legs hug me! It tickles!"_ Before Robina's eyes the toddler turned into a small bitey half-dog cub. But he was so _cute!_ Valencia put the child down carefully, he snarled and ran back to play with other Lycan-children. Seemed to have forgotten the bush. "You were saying?"

Suddenly the Slayer and Blake Hurst crashed into the villiage. Blake Hurst looked raged, foaming at the mouth. The other Lycans stepped aside for him in due respect. Seraphine kept begging for forgiveness as he stormed away from her. They formed a circle around her, a curious one. There was silence. Too much silence. Then Blake Hurst spoke quietly: "Is it true that you've kept contact with this vampire, whelp of the Faluno clan? We differ from that of Rostrum in that we change purely on adrenaline rush, no full moon required. Anyway, that is UNACCEPTABLE conduct of Slayers- and other beings. This was a second home to you here because of your remarkable skills in Slaying undead. How you repaid us like this! Those secrets kept from new generations of noble Lycans. A disgraceful act,"

One lady ran to comfort Seraphine, but she was stopped by the others. Robina looked scared of this. Blake Hurst accused the Slayer, poking her in the ribs. "You know what happens now." The Hurst's clothes burst off, revealing a monstrous Lycan man with a shocking fur of cream. Seraphine responded in rage, form changing rapidly. Already long fangs appeared as her muzzle lengthened and toffee fur flowed downwards. Her fingernails were sharper. It only took a few seconds.  
"Alpha Bratwurst; _I DID NOT have anything to do with Tetris!" _she insisted. Valencia was shocked, the Faluno leader had the name of a German sausage of all things. Bratwurst just threw a hissy fit, Alpha wasn't use to disobedience.

"Ostracism!" called Bratwurst, "Who don't comply with our clan are exiled for three years- if there are 600+ votes. Paws with claws up if you want the Slayer to be exiled from Faluno clan!" Some of the Lycans put up their palms. Bratwurst frowned and theey hurriedly raised their paws. "The great Slayer is now EXILED!" howled the beast. Just then, a scent of meat wafted from the bushes. Nostrils flared as each of the Lycans surrounding the Slayer sniffed. They growled eagerly, tails wagged.  
_"Let's join the hunt!"_ yelled one boy eagerly. Seraphine saw Tetris straggle through the bushes still with a dog collar around his neck, Bratwurst smiled. "Come on pathetic Vampire pet, you pale skinned rat!" the Alpha yelled. That was the last staw for the Slayer, seeing the Mage teased like that. _"NO! He's mine, all mine. Go get your own prey, I claim Tetris as my own bounty!"_

Surprised by her own courage (or maybe just hunger), the Collie-Lycan leapt, putting herself between the pale mage and her Lycan clan. Others smelling her scent were afraid of the Whelp's territory. They whimpered like cowardly animals.  
"The HECK?! The Slayer is protecting me from this Psycho pack?" yelled Tetris, believing what he saw. The hunted became protected? Weird. Something out of Twilight Zone (lol). Seraphine crouched low, "Go get your own prey."  
Robina, Valencia and Tek realised the worst thing: They were 'prey'! "CURSE YOU!" yelled Robina running in the dark (lol!) Valencia tossed her dagger right at one of the Lycans, but he ducked. "Have better luck performing in a circus!"  
Tek wished she never talked into this 'mission' as the three ran into trees, leapt over logs and crashed into Sneevils... repeated infinitely. The Lycans were gaining on them. "Are two legs better than four? Think we can outrun them?!"

"NO! Keep running, Tek!" Robina yelled, "I could shoot them like in Monster Hunt...! Doh!" KABLAM! She crashed into a well.  
"Knicky-knack paddy-wack give Xanatolvs a bone, the ol' doggies all ran home!" Tek sang at Valencia. They still running, a minute later they hid in the bushes. The Lycans ran past them. "Think, Valley! What could get these Xanatolvs off us?"  
"I've heard that Silver wards them off." Valencia suggested. Tek laughed, "Got any silver Credit coins?" No. "Wolfbane plant?" No. "Steak and Hammer?!" Valencia shooked in her boots. "We're doomed."


	20. Enter the Shifter

Author's notes: I'm sorry, I'm sorry for not updating! It's because I needed to finish off the OM saga and write a side-story project (with Olapen, no doubt) and I went out and had fun and who knows what else. Some people are confused on how to pronounce some names. Trinenna is pronounced 'Trin-enna', Diaglo is 'Di-a-glow' (with emphasis on the glow) and Harlinique is 'Har-li-ne-queue'. As for Melkior... I'm stumped. XD And who is Melkior? SEEEECRET! hehee. I'm not revealing who she is until AQWorlds main story gets started! You guys might have seen Diaglo, Trinenna and Melkior running around that recently though! If so, say hi! I understand this is quite short, but I will work on this more after Christmas ends

This chapter will intensify everything and have randomness! Plus: Devi looses his humour and jokes!

* * *

"Like I said," Seraphine repeated, "Who are you three calling a Xanatolv?! Are you," her lips quivered, "Referring to me?" The three Solunians shook their heads in fear, Valencia just stood. "What are Xanatolvs anyway," she shrugged cheerfully. She was rather oblivious to it all.  
"Nothing! In fact, I think someone's calling us!" replied Vixen hurriedly, "Can't you hear it Val?" Valencia looked confused at this.  
"We can't hear anything with that noi-" Devi began, but Vixen just glared and gave him the ebil eye. Oooohhh. "Yeah, I hear it too! It must be Zorbak! We're apprentices to that lil ebil mouse!... (why are we doing this again)" he whispered back to Vixen as they dragged Misako back to their rooms. Three doors slammed right in Seraphine's face. A minute later, Valencia was dragged in too. "What? No invitations?! The nerve of them!" The slayer growled. "I wanna be invited!!!" She scratched at doors hopefully. "Damn, and to think Trinenna's up to something. I better eavesdrop."

"Did you call me?" Trinenna appeared in a poof of smoke, chuckling. "Nothing like some Undead to liven up a party." she clinked some ice in a wine glass. "I was in the cemetery chatting up ghouls and scaring dark Ravens." Tetris gave her a weird look. "It's a hobby of mine." Tetris just stared at this blankly, "You have some weird hobbies! And strange habits!" The vampire laughed at this. "How did you come?"  
"By the gumdrop fairy in farieland," Trinenna said sarcastically, "And she lives in a holey shoe near Dragonclaw Island."  
"Really? Wow! Where can I see her!" Tetris said excitedly, looking around. "She better arrive soon! WHEE-!"  
"I was being Sarcastic," replied Trinenna, standing. "Don't you know sarcasm?" Good ol' mage, back to his dumbness! That was uncalled for. She punted Tetris for good measure. Tetris fell on his backside after being tossed 2 m into the atmosphere.  
"YEOWWWWWCH!" The vampire yelled. At this everyone in Battleon looked up. "There! Feeling better now?" Trinenna snickered.  
"It hurts!" complained the mage, rubbing "Thanks a lot!"

"Guuuys!" Seraphine yelled, "Please be quiet! I CAN'T hear with all that racket you shout!" she shushed the two, she put her ear to the doorway. Trinenna and Tetris did too out of pure boredom. "Can you hear what they're saying??" Tetris shook his head.  
"Shouldn't we just barge in and ask them?" asked Tetris with humour. Trinenna just glared, he was the weird one, not her.  
"What? And ruin all the fun?" Trinenna snickered, "Not if my ancestor got anything to do with this." Guys, could NEVER understand them. Tetris had a random thought about her. "Aren't you silly? You didn't put 'doom and gloom' into any sentences yet." Facefault. It was then that she pulled out a inflatable hammer... from hammer space. Tetris looked like silly putty. Seraphine groaned: she only asked them to listen!  
_"It'll be the doom and gloom of both of you if you don't shut up!"_ roared Seraphine. She howled and silent with fear as they listened to the conversation. A few seconds passed and then -

"It burns! Every word burns! GYAAAAHHH!" exclaimed Tetris falling to the ground. Trinenna sweatdropped at this drama. "Ok, I'm done!" he exclaimed jumping back up with a happy hop. "Seriously," he added, "Every word they speak is incomprehensible! Must be some kind of morse code." Shifty eyes. Seraphine's eyes bugged out at this, "Just what are those pilots saying!" the Slayer squeaked, "I cant understand a THING they're saying! Whoever had the mind to create this language-?" Just then Duke Whirlwind sat in the bathtub with his squeaky rubby duckie, borrowed from Cysero singing 'Splish Splash' and then ran out, 'I forgot my towel, _Falrjiyu_!' he screamed, ''I need my toowweeelll!" Just then his mask slipped off. "My MAAAASK! It's slipped-" the Duke continued screaming as he fell down 30 stairs of Yulgar's inn, "Stairs- YAAAAGGHH!!!".

"Gloomy forcast, if it can't get any worse," muttered Trinenna watching the clumsy Duke stumble his way around after rolling down the stairs. The Duke Whirlwind managed to catch his mask, but then it fell to pieces to his horror. "The horror of it all," noted Trinenna in a flat voice.  
"My mask! I need a replacement, and fast." shrieked the poor Duke Whirlwind, "I can't stand being in the nude, and without my precious!" He looked around for a towel and grabbed... Furry blue paws belonging to a certain blue short Moglin. "ZORBAK! You've got to help me!"  
"Help you?! I am the great Ebil Zorbak, cower before my awesomeness and undead shoppin' bags! Meh, and when since do I help pathetic adventurer's friends such as Seraphine?" said the blue animal as he winked, he had someone with him, "Right ol' bro Kabroz?" One of them was sniffling: 'AAACHEW!' Duke Whirlwind stepped back in disgust as green goo splattered over him. _BLOOOSH!_

"Eugh! I hate germs!" commented the Duke, wiping off Moglin mucus (pretty disgusting), "Do you have anything that can help me?"  
"Wellll..." Zorbak snickered as he looked at his brother, "I DO have something for you and that nasty Seraphine." The Moglin handed Duke Whirlwind what looked like two small potion bottles marked: 'Do not touch, or drink.'. "Take that to that ratty Lycan shrew, and whatever you do... DON'T DRINK IT!" he yelled at the Duke, just about to drink it. "It's not a love potion. Can't you FOLLOW simple instructions? Numb-skull." At this the Duke shrugged, pocketing it. If the Duke cared to notice, he would notice an empty table next to him with the label 'Drink me' taken off. But as he was rather simpleminded, he ignored the note. "Meheheheh!" laughed Zorbak as a lamppost crashed on his face, 'MEH.' Kabroz sneezed loudly, so loudly that everyone heard him. The roof rattled as it was taken off. 'whoops!'

"What's this? Another note?!" asked Seraphine as the Duke handed her the note from Zorbie, "Duke Eugeniro, that note is full of... BOY GERMS!" Thirty minutes afterwards the poor Slayer started sneezing loudly, it sounded like she had a cold. A really bad one, snot started running out her nose and dribbling everywhere. She looked a mess. "I mudst avood andys contact!" she glared at the Duke, "Thunks to ya, I neez an armourz moor powafuel than usuaaal if I cant be undastood wid a (ggrreuu) could." she sniffled. What did she say? "I SED EYE HAD DA COULD!" Seraphine yelled at the sentence, aiming her bow already. We get it already. "Duhz, i hatez thaze coulds, rar." she swore, "Itz naught vary often eye get onez." Well, it's not very often anyone gets sick is it? _"Yah, whet?"_ the girl Lycan scowled, _"I caaan't goez on andy advenchez waan eye ham stick."_ Ham-stick? "AAARRRGGGHHH!" yelled Seraphine in frustration at her new cold. "Wan I am sick." Wan is sick? "Ergh."

_"How much is that Xuntolv in the window the one with a wiggly tail?"_ spoke up Juan, at this the Slayer groaned with this cliche. He was a bit cheeky, it wasn't funny to her. _"but I certainly hope she's for-_ GAH!" he shouted, seeing her runny nose, he stepped away. She sniffed at this, curling her lips in anger, "Do you mind being a LITTLE more polite, where did you learn that song?" Juan said 'awww' in sympathy at this, before saying: 'This song from Vixen should cheer you up, _who's afraid of the big bad -er- good Xuntolv? Balalaika.'  
_"That's a grreat song," winked Tetris thinking of girls to suck, "but I am the badass bat out of Hell for Rock and Roll!"

While Juan sang to Seraphine, Artix and Hans opened the Inn. Hans paled and Artix got out his Zardian newspaper and pointed to the entrance, "Wolfie, get out of the Inn." Juan looked protective and stuttered. "But, Trixie, you can-not-t, she's special." Artix's brow lifted in confusion, 'In what way? Is this Lycan even related?!' He seemed to have forgotten something about her. Very important~!  
"Yeah, cousin Seraphine." Juan responded, Artix's jaw dropped to the ground. "WHAAAAT?!" screamed poor Artix like a girl, "That isn't possible, I've trained you to vanquish the dark creatures of the forsaken night! But that child I delivered to Xaru just happens to be-" At this the oh-so noble Paladin fainted after recognizing Seraphine after so many years ago. He just couldn't believe his eyes. After a melodramatic pause:  
"Well, I certainly cracked his nerve," Juan chuckled awkwardly at his 'sister', "I don't think he's up to exorcising spirits for a while! Unlike say Frostvale a couple of years ago." Seraphine chuckled, noodling Tetris.

Meanwhile, Misako and her two friends inched past Seraphine's back as she talked to Tetris. They were clearly scared of her and weren't used to Xanatolves as of yet. "Fweep?" asked Seraphine. They froze. "Are you scared of me?" asked the Slayer. Devi gulped with fear at this, the Martin just shook his head, as Misako and Vixen both nodded. The three had never seen a real Xanatolv until now. "Well, there's nothing to be afraid of," grinned the Slayer doggedly, tongue hanging out as she licked her muzzle, "Recognise me?" she asked Koko. she inched back.  
"... You're that doggy I played with months earlier at night?" winced Misako, "But you were so cute then, how come you're talking now on two legs?" Seraphine looked sus at Koko, whuffing with curiosity. "Tetris, you can explain to them?" she asked the damp vampire mage.  
"WEEEEELLLL," Tetris yelled, "That is suspicious and it's kinda weird how things turned out, ain't it? You see, when a mummy Lorian and a daddy wolf love each other very muccch... OW!" Juan slapped Tetris in the face, the Paladin blushin'.

"That was rather unnecessary! ... Tetris?!" Juan grinned, before noticing the mage drooling at the three people. Devi and Vixen ran back to wall. "So what are you going to do the rest of the day?!" the redhead said. Devi just shrugged, "The ghost of Galrick told us about this cool thing called the Rip in the Sky. Anyone up to coming?!" Five hands shot up. "Me, me, pick us!" yelled Duke and Tetris, banging their heads together. Tetris scowled at the Duke. "US, US, US, US!" Duke Eugeniro continued shouting, knockin' into poor Tetris. The mage was NOT impressed.  
"YAY! We're getting out after being trapped in Battleon for so long, _Gelatino!"_ cheered the Duke, "In your face, blocky!"  
"Blocky?!" retorted Tetris, "Not the sun again, Nero!" he pounced on the Duke, snarling.  
"Heeeey! No fighting in here, brawlers!" Hans yelled as Yuglar entered.  
"Less punting, more swashing! We only talk about four things in the Fight Club!" Yuglar yelled as everyone did an anime fall.

* * *


	21. Heart of the beast

Devi was confused, more than confused. How did he end up in this situation? The last thing he remembered was that a coy stranger shoved him into the back of a carriage heading for the dark woods of Amyteville - right after crashing into a high cliff. At high noon. Firking, Alyesia seemed persuasive. Perhaps more-so than Devi could admit, but anyhow, he ended up... Where? He sat in the local Darkovian inn, trying to get his thoughts together as the misfit crowd at the bar cheered for more drinks to pass around. Devi looked anxious as the patrons eyed him with instinctual hunger, he struggled to get his thoughts together.

This FACT wouldn't be SO awful if the customers at this rowdy nightclub turned out to be humans, but they weren't. they were the some of the worst bargainers imaginable! They were... Vampire-traders. That's right. Devi had found himself right in the middle of a rabid rave-party. And the looks they were giving him suggested that he'd be next on their limited menu... UNLESS-!

"Muaha." responded an elder vampire, by the name of... Rafi the Impaler, "There's a lot... At stake, wouldn't you say, meatloaf? We only serve the living impaired."  
Devi gave a grim look at his hidden and ingrown claws, full of dirt from the grave. "I'm only staying for a little while! There's no tab on the drinks?" Devi managed to squeak out, terrified. The Vampires laughed in irony at the naive mecha pilot. "Relax, it's only the Unhappy hour, there's FREE DRINKS, and a fresh supply... out there." Rafi pointed to the barrels out the back, dripping with some distinct reddish-hued 'sauce', there was another tap for the same blueish liquid. Devi's eye twitched with fear at this, but the Rafi's hands snapped onto his arm.

"It's 'tomato sauce' for the rest of the bat clan," replied Rafi with a thick accent, giving a wink at the rest who knowingly chuckled and tilted their small glasses and martini. "It is after all! HALLOWEeeeeeEEEeeEN!" Rafi gave a raspy cheer that sounded more like a screech and Devi clasped his large hands over his pointed ears. The cry broke several glasses behind the bar. The gloomy atmosphere subsided instantly, as the others glared. "RAFI!" the un-proud undead responded.  
"Oops, my bad." responded the living impaired, sighing, "That'll cost a fortune!" Another patron glided into the bar, before morphing into a tuxedo pretty-boy vampire, with bleached hair... he glittered with the moonlight. "Ah, Eduardo, whatya have?"

"NO TABS. This is the whim of a Hunter, Rafi. and if I hear about Tetris and his idiotic escapades with that SLAYER one more time-!!!" Eduardo replied, snapping before staring at Devi. A slow smile crept on his gaunt face. "But I'll pass for a bit-" Suddenly there was an interruption and the Vampires grew silent with... uh, silent rapture.

Alyesia appeared through the curtains, dressed in a stipperific costume. The other vampires stopped ganging up and started drooling at this display, whereas Devi looked ... floored, "Oh my Lorithia, MY EYES! I cannot unsee that!". Haunted and jaunty music drifted through the curtains. "I like sweet tonic and I cannot lie, why don't you patronise?"


	22. Battleon of the Nexus April fools

Time: Thursday, 8 April 2010

** Battleon of the Nexus** - 2010 April fools chapter - to be updated soon xD Also: An appearance by One Eyed Doll and... let's find out!

There was an annual Fool magic fizzing in the cooling night breeze as the early sun peeped over the horizon. The cockerel crowed twice as a brawny hand reached out and slammed a fist against the cliff-face, sleepily turning over and yawning as Larosin, Dragon Tamer, awakens to a brand new 'morning', complaining about how uneasy the ground felt as her room-mate complained loudly about how the tent felt "Cramped" somehow. "Morning, Rayne." Rosia sleepily said as she stared at her reflection in the pool outside their tent (Yes, Rayne and Rosia both share a tent at the moment...) At feeling around for her mirror, she noticed her fringe was cropped shorter and flowed much more ragged over her shoulders. Then Rayne replied in amazement at the reflection:

"Is it just me or has your voice deepened a few octaves?" said Rayne's gender-swapped voice... Then 'he' appeared, Rayne's lips full-blown and his figure changed to be much more slimmer and curvier in the hermaphrodite's regular Rogue outfit, "watcha think? Rosia? Whoa! WHAT HAPPENED TO US? Is this a joke?" 'Ray' looked at the Dragon-Tamer's rippling abs, and fainted from how muscular she appeared from his view. "AAAAGGGHHHHH! MY FIRKING HAIR!" The only reply was Rosia's loud scream that shook the trees from their roots. "I'M so ANGRY!" The male Rosia grabbed Twilly in rage and growled at the brown furball, "Ask Warlic what he did to us! OR ELSE. And bring lotsa Alvenos shampoo and some Cowchickens ta slaughter for breakfast,"

"Hey, this is so deja vu," The older female Lorian, Ray answered, "But didn't this happen last year?" Rosia burned with distaste at Rayne's false explanation. "HULK SMASH! You don't get me angry over my hair! I must lotion and lather my cropped hair with shaving cream and wax! And I need a shower! A manly shower."  
"OH NOES!" Twilly yelled exitting from Rosia's tent, "this is a catastrophe! I AM GONNA get outta here!" The furry Moglin squeaked loudly as Rosia stared at Twilly, about to punt him. He ran as fast as a speeding Night-mare! "Warlic! We hafta situation!" At this announcement 'Seraph' awoke in Darkovia, disorientated, the male Slayer shook her fur like a regular Xunatolv, before his eyes widened- time seemed to freeze. He glanced at his hands, then touched his sparkling hair and noticed glitter everywhere, "Dammit, I turned into a sparkling bishie." Seraph realised, not pleased at the transformation, then he glanced at his PANTS.

"What the hell happened here?" The former female Slayer yelled, "I'm male! AARRGGHH! THIS ALMOST IS LIKE HELL, ArooOOo!" Needless to say, Seraph had a lot at angst over this incident and wasn't the bit miffed by the fact that she now had the muscles and power of a dominant Alpha Lycan. He fell over immediately as a Super Saiyan Drakel called Pi came over over to see the commotion. The small Drakel laughed. "Haha! The Slayer of Darkovia! Turned to the opposite gender! Well, well."  
"I'll demand!" Seraph yelled to Pi-squared, "It's not funny!" His fur bristled as the draconian Pi continued fooling and floating around, dodging his every hit. "Whaddya want?" Pi's eye glinted. "To give ya something, in exchange for..." His eyes narrowed, "Pie. I like pie. Do ya like mudkips?" Seraph fell over anime style. "No? Ha."  
"I like pie, but I hate mudkips!" seethed an irate Seraph, "I got pie, come and get it~" he added playfully.

"Where da pie? Where's the R? Or a square?" Seraph added mockingly before tossing his backpack containing Baneware at poor Pi. The Drakel squawked in protest.  
"Got any more pot roast?" Pi was scared at the large pet Wolf and cringed before tossing her hurriedly a package, "Here's your much needed power up!" Pi added playfully, "It'll make ya super! And turns your hair blonder! You'll become just like me!"

"Why in Lore would I want BLONDER hair?" Seraph wondered, "I already look like a dork with my male getup garb!" His question went unanswered as Pi gave an enigmatic smile, but he looked rather furious. "Up up and that's your Takeaway!" Before you can say 'Fie' the Drakel zoomed off to outer space to have a small chat to the LSS Alteon where a special visitor awaited him. "Special message for..." A shadowy form with silver eyes accepted the offer, before smirking rather secretly...

_"Well, it's about time, what's the news, Pi. Make it quick."_ A blonde captain with a lazy ponytail nuzzled the seductress's hand, "You're mine, Odaxitar." Launce said in lieu of her blushing, "And you can't even protest about it, hmm." Just then a Holommunitar rang and Launce answered it, crooking his arm around the Soul Weaver. "Wace? Uh huh... One Eyed Doll? Chaos? Mayhem? Battle of the Bands? Yahuh... hm," Launce had a secretive smirk on his face, "I just had an idea. A good one, since the dreaded One-Eyed Doll of Chaos is situated in Battleon for the week... mehehheh." He rubbed his hands with glee before kissing his captive on the cheek.

* * *

"Then why are we affected?" Deeta demanded of Masoti and Vixen, "And why the flagjog is Vixen of all people unaffected?" Seraph paused for awhile, thinking it over, "It's because she's not a native to Lore." Deeta's feminine face flushed, "I'M also not a native to this continent!" The female Martin insisted, "And I'm still affected!"  
"Well, it might be because she's a human. Humans are unaffected, but aliens as well as Lorians are affected, the only people unaffected are those in out of space!"  
"What the double tee-eff does that mean?" asked Demeter (Tetris), her dumbness still evident.

"Oh look! It's the She-man of the Puny-verse," teased Vixen as a raging Rosia appeared, "And she's armed! With rifles, and hammers and swords, oh my." She pushed Masoti into a log pile as Rosia entered the compound (OW! commented Masoti as he knocked his head on a Twig, 'FWISHES!' responded Twig as he started stuffing his cwute face of Masoti's hair). "Sorry Misa- I mean Masoti. Hey, who are you?" she yelled playfully at the male Dragon Tamer. Masoti shivered in his log-pile as Rosia looked suspiciously at the quivering heap of logs. Rosia grunted and dismissed the shaking logs, before turning to Vixen.

"I am the greatest Rosetta stone." Rosia announced, before he realised what he said, "I mean," He cleared his throat loudly as Vixen laughed hysterically at his mistake, "I MEAN, I am the great ROSIA! I am strong! I am not the Mighty Moron! I am almost half the hulk- but don't get my hair messed up~!" Rosia had a death glare at Vixen's face, trying to hide her glee at the Dragon Tamer's response at everything. "Did I say anything that offended you." Rosia glared some more, having a glaring contest with Vixen. "Because I AM... A DRAGON TAMER~" he announced operatically, "And I'm here to promote my hair lotion!" Rosia flaunted his dazzling shiny hair full of glossiness and swung it in reeeeeallllyyyyy slooooow motion to the opening tune of 'Carlifornia, Here we come'... "Oh, have you seen Warlic? Ya know, the one with the biiig staff." Vixen tried desperately not to laugh at Rosia's extravagant face, but it was too hard to resist.

"BWAHahaha..." Vixen spluttered, before realising Rosia glaring at her, "... it's not a joke?" she said sheepishly, "please don't do anything you'll regret," Rosia sheathed his Jeffery Can Opener and shoved in the poor Vixen's face, "MAAASOOTTTIII!" she screamed as Rosia started chasing her around with death threats raining down. "WHY-youlittlefirking-snobbishoeyken-whodarestolaugh-inmyface!" Rosia ran around, trying to slash at his opponent and frothing at the mouth. "RAAAAWWWRRRRRRRRR!" The Dragon Tamer looked rather feral, "HULK HAMMER NAOWWW!" Just then Masoti couldn't bear it any longer and exploded from the log-pile, before tackling the rabid Dragon Tamer. _SMAAAASSHHH! SHATTER!_ "BWAHAHAHAHA!" Seraph said as the Slayer saw the scene before him, laughing at their antics.  
"LEAVE MY FRIEND OUT OF THIS!" Masoti yelled, punching Rosia in the face, "I shall duel you!" Rosia deflected the blow and came to his senses briefly.  
"Feh, call that a measly small punch? THIS IS A PUNCH!" Rosia summoned up his rippling abs full of extra hard muscles as his eyes glowed yellow, "Ultra mega falcon spinning poke!" With this, Rosia launched three precise blows at Masoti and the Force exploded, sending him through three walls of concrete. CRASSHH! CLATTER! wrrrl  
"Ow my arm!" Masoti screamed, clutching his arm as Tetris came to the commotion. Coincidentally, Tetris was a... "A frog?" Masoti facepalmed.

"Ribbit!" offered Tetris slimily, "I cannot help you, I need my skin to be nourished with water. Worm?" Seraph just screamed at Tetris's temporary appearance.  
"AROOOOOOO! Ah!" Seraph over reacted, activating his Chi as he saw Tetris's form, he forgot he was wearing his Saiyan suit while floating 400 feet. "FROOOGGG!" Just then a huge mega-loud explosion occurred in the vicinity, accidentally activated by the panicky bishounen Slayer. Rosia looked up to see a huge glowing white comet heading for him. "Saiyan comet overloaaaaaadddddd! AAAAHHHHHHHHHH! FRROOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGG!" Seraph managed to scream. He missed.

"Oh cr-" Rosia said before it hit him with full power. KAAAPOWWWW! "-Raaaaapppp!" he managed to finish, face-down with eyes spinning in swirly circles. Masoti got up from the rubble, covered in dust as the fallen walls protected him from the brunt of the comet-powered force. Masoti cautiously inched away from the unconscious Rosia, picking up a shaken Vixen, "Let's find Deeta and Seraph and get this sorted out." They both ran for the direction of the woods.

* * *

"Come to me, music lovers!" crooned a wonderful deep masculine voice of the Darkovian Forest, "Come to me, lovers of soft gentle awesome music!" proclaimed the voice of... The Phantom X! Classical music erupted from the woods, the Lycans and Vampires crowding around the organ which continued to play the... you get the point? The Phantom X had a black cloak and streaming blonde hair, hidden under a poorly disguised face-makeup.  
"yesss!" groaned the rest of the Battleon crowd, eager to hear more of the lovely music, "we want to hear more... more rock music!" The Phantom X face-faulted, before readjusting his tiny mask. ('Clearly, this isn't working' Launce in disguise as the Phantom, stated to a hypnotized Odaxitar behind the organ.) _Dah dah duhh duh!_  
"We want to hear more Chaos!" proclaimed Tek as Valencia groped the Phantom's gown, "We want you to strip for us! For we shall do so if you-" They proceeded to do so, under the Phantom's command. The Lycans snarled their approval as the music continued, "For those who'd seen my face, strip under my command!"  
"Not another song sequence~" groaned Twilly at this. "This awesome trance over you, you cannot desist." The Phantom X continued, "In your dreams, I'm game for you, you already slept," He continued leering at Odaxitar, "And your desire always burnt for me, though you've turned. What is this mask you wore? For others to see." He urged his captive, "The Phantom X is always there, for love is blind."

"Those who had seen my true face, drew back if seared." Odaxitar began in her entranced state, "For the mask I always wore, is now discarded." Everyone face-faulted, clearly she wasn't good at rhyming. But no one bothered to look behind the organ, so they wondered who else was speaking. "Your awesome power over us grew stronger yet... Although I tend to forfeit." Everyone else began dancing the Polka and started stripping some more.  
"It's me they heard!" The Phantom X chuckled, "Your futile soul and my awesome mega-powerful voice, had now combined, for the Phantom X is controlling everyone's miiiiiiinnnndds..." Launce chuckled secretly, at his ploy.


End file.
